Down and Out in Swampy Acres

Our guest columnist filed the following complaint with the Alaska Division of Elections on February 21. We previously heard from him a year ago, when he challenged the election of Lisa Murkowski on the grounds that “women or non-white citizens” are not Constitutionally qualified to hold office.

COMES NOW Gordon Warren Epperly, Pro Se, challenging the Nomination Petition of Barack Hussein Obama II, Aka Barack Hussein Obama, Aka Barack H. Obama or his Electors to appear on the Primary and General Election Ballots of the State of Alaska as a Candidate for the Office of President of the United States of America…

Standing of Complainant

I, Gordon Warren Epperly, has been domiciled within the State of Alaska since the year of 1965 and has resided at 10440 Glacier Highway in Juneau, Alaska (Swampy Acres) since the year of 1967. I am eligible to register as a voter and have voted in local and State Elections in past years. I am eligible to register to vote even though I have chosen not to do so for several years.

Status of Candidate

Barack Hussein Obama II, Aka Barack Hussein Obama, Aka Barack H. Obama has the race status of being a “Mulatto.” Barack Obama’s father (Barack Hussein Obama I) was a full blood Negro being born Nyang’oma Kogelo, Nyanza Province, Kenya and raised in the Colony of Kenya. Barack Obama’s mother (Stanley Ann Dunham) was a white Caucasian women being born in Wichita, Kansas on November 29, 1942 and raised in the State of Washington and in the State of Hawaii.

Office Qualifications For President of United States

Office qualifications for the President of the United States is set forth in the Constitution for the United States of America at Article II, Section 1, Clause 5:

“No person except a natural born Citizen or a Citizen of the United States at the time of the adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the office of President; neither shall any person be eligible to that office who shall not attained to the age of thirty-five years, and been fourteen years a resident within the United States.”

and in regard to Barack Hussein Obama II as a Presidential Candidate, the citizenship qualifications set forth in the Fourteenth and Fifteenth Amendments to the United States Constitution for “Negroes” and “Mulattos” also applies…

Barack Hussein Obama II is not a “natural born Citizen” of the United States

As stated above, for an Individual to be a Candidate for the Office of President of the United States, the Candidate must meet the qualifications as set forth in the United States Constitution and one of those qualifications is that the Candidate shall be a “natural born Citizen” of the United States. As Barack Hussein Obama II is of the “Mulatto” race, his status of citizenship is founded upon the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution. Before the [purported] ratification of the Fourteenth Amendment, the race of “Negro” or “Mulatto” had no standing to be citizens of the United States under the United States Constitution.

As the Fourteenth Amendment is only a grant of “Civil Rights” and not a grant of “Political Rights,” Barack Hussein Obama II does not have any “Political Rights” under any provision of the United States Constitution to hold any Public Office of the United States government. Furthermore, there is considerable debate within the enclosed supporting documents that shows Barack Hussein Obama II was not born on the soil of the United States and that he was not subject to the jurisdiction of the United States at the time of his birth. If this is true, it would appear that Barack Hussein Obama II may not only be in want of having the status of being a “natural born Citizen,” but he may not even be a “citizen of the United States.” Being absent of proper status of Citizenship, Barack Hussein Obama II, nor his Delegates, have the qualifications to appear on the Election Ballots for the State of Alaska…

As Barack Hussein Obama II father was never a United States citizen (natualized or otherwise), Barack Obama Jr. did not have two parents who were citizens of the United States at the time of his birth and therefore, he is not a “natural born Citizen” of the United States and thus he, or his Delegate, are not qualified to appear of the Election Ballots of the State of Alaska as a Candidate for the Office of President of the United States…

Prayer for Relief

The Objector of this Complaint, Gordon Warren Epperly, hereby moves the Director of the Alaska State Division of Elections to withhold the name of Barack Hussein Obama II, Aka Barack Hussein Obama, Aka Barack H. Obama or his Electors from appearing on the Election Ballots for the State of Alaska as a Candidate for the Office of President of the United States until such time Mr. Barack Obama Jr. produces “verified” documents that declare the statements therein to be true, complete, and correct, under “Penalties of Perjury” which qualifies him to be a Candidate for the Office of President of the United States of America.

“Epperly v. Obama” [PDF, via Turning Left]

Gordon Warren Epperly, Alaska Man, Says Obama Is Ineligible To Be President Because Of His Race [HuffPo, via @AdamSerwer]


I love how dumb people incorrectly use italics and quotation marks for emphasis.

If dumb-ass is going to incorrectly read/parse “No person except a natural born Citizen or a Citizen of the United States at the time of the adoption of this Constitution…” to mean that Negros/mulattos can’t be president, then you can also incorrectly read that phrase to meant that the only people who can be president were the ones who were living as a citizen in the U.S. in 1789.

Vote Zombie Crypt-Keeper 2012!

Love the “[purported] ratification” bit – that says more about this guy than the whole rest of the thing. Must be one of those neoconfederate assclowns who’s still pissed about losing the war.


See you like in a week or so.

Sorry I missed the fapping.

Carry on.

@SanFranLefty: I just got me a zombie hunting license courtesy of RML’s post on FB. You may want one too: I’ve been to San Francisco.

Like Barry would ever win Alaska … what a maroon.

@SanFranLefty: What I love is that he seems to think that law is a series of incantations, that if you write things just so, magic happens!

That, and the adorable subject-verb mismatches.

The Epperlys filed a federal suit in 1990. The suit appears to have something to do with citizenship and the IRS. He discusses his case on the Yahoo group: Tips and Tricks for Going to Court under the moniker LegalBear7.

[9] On November 2, 1990, Appellants Gordon, Esther, Niels, and Bobbi Epperly (“Epperlys”), appearing pro se, filed an amended complaint asserting various claims including: (1) that several unidentified employees of the United States Government have “trespassed” on their real property located in Alaska by arbitrarily classifying such land as “wetlands”, and that such classification constitutes a taking of property without compensation in violation of the Fifth Amendment; (2) that Appellants are entitled to a refund of all federal income taxes paid given that they are “American Inhabitants” who possess sovereign powers and immunities and are thus “nonresident aliens” as defined by the tax code; and (3) that IRS employee number 2981806539 violated their constitutional rights under Article Four as well as the First, Fifth, Ninth, and Tenth Amendments by mailing Gordon Epperly a letter stating that he had been assessed $500 for filing a frivolous tax return.*fn1 See E.R. p. 7-15 (Amended Complaint, p. 5-13); Appellants’ Brief, p. 9-20. In their amended complaint, Appellants further request a declaration that the Fourteenth Amendment was never ratified. See E.R. p. 13 (Amended Complaint, p. 11).

@texrednface: He’s also a regular in the letters section of the local paper. Of course. Your basic Small-Town Crank. To the degree that he’s representative of Birthers Across America, I can’t say. But he’s thoroughly representative of Small-Town Cranks.

My high school social-studies teacher brought one to class one day — Dean Kennedy, because I still remember the name decades later. He regaled us with tales (and extensive documentation) of the Mulatto Conspiracy, which may have been the first time I had heard the M-word. We spent the next week snickering that somebody could be so batshit crazy.

The teacher would probably be fired today for letting such a Dangerous Individual into the room. But I’ve always seen it as an example of the value of Free Discussion. Dean Kennedy inoculated me against the Dean Kennedys of the world for life.

@nojo: Thank you. I had a question for SanFran Lefty regarding Mr. Epperly’s suit but I just ran out of steam before I could ask it. I think my question was : “Do you understand WTF is he talking about?
Oh and the crank that came to my school was Dixie Leber (rebel spelled backwards), Grand Dragoness of the local KKK. She wore her robe and tall pointy hood hat. I shit you not. And when she took took her tall pointy hood hat off her wig came off with it.

Tumblr is good for fapping. Or so I’ve heard.

@texrednface: When her wig came off, did the class laugh? (How old were her auditors/onlookers?)

@texrednface: @nojo: My 9th grade American History teacher was obsessed with the Kennedy assassination, and we spent two months “studying”* all the alternate theories. He tried to organize a field trip to go up to Dallas to see Dealy Plaza but the school put the kibbosh on it. Then he tried to tack it on to the band’s trip up there for state marching band championship. Lucky for me, I wasn’t a band geek, although all my friends were. Also lucky for me, my mom was a 8th/9th grade American History teacher and I had been helping her grade papers for years and so I already knew the information he was not teaching us. My classmates, not so lucky…

*I use quotation marks as it consisted of him showing the Zapruder film a hundred times, making us read things about how the Illumniati and the Mob were behind it, and having a few guest speakers.

Oh and texrednface: I think I know what he’s trying to say. However, reading it reminds me of some of the briefs I’ve seen from opposing counsel where they are so fucking incoherent and idiotic that to be able to respond, you first have to basically rewrite the thing so that it is coherent, and then write your response.

@lynnlightfoot: You’re here! Everything okay in your neck of the woods? No tornadoes?

@lynnlightfoot: Senior year Richardson High School. I don’t don’t remember anyone laughing at the wig misstep. This was 1973.
I hope you and your family and friends are alright up yonder.

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment