Go Pluck Yourself

Are you supposed to choke your chicken(s) before or after you get to the doctor’s office?

this chicken thing is pure gold

I will need to come up with 514 chickens for my upcoming colonoscopy.
seems very reasonable actually.

MRI: 462
Colonoscopy: 514
What the surgeons thought I had-Colon Cancer: 8738
What I actually had X3 Appendectomy: 3057
Glad I’m live in Canada City and my taxes pay for a lot of this: priceless

Where could anyone get approx 4000 chickens to pay for all this?

Will they take KFC? Assuming:
A 9 piece box = 1 chicken
A 15 piece bucket = 1 2/3 chickens

Yeah this is pretty fucking stupid.

@ManchuCandidate:
I am so glad you did not have what they thought you had

@Capt Howdy:
You could probably shave down that number if you don’t want anesthesia. I don’t recommend that though.

@Capt Howdy:
Tell me about it. I was not really looking forward to life without a colon/prostate/bladder.

And someone writes in to TPM…

I just went to my doctor’s office for a sinus/ear infection. I had never seen this particular physician before and certainly didn’t bring up politics with him, but as I was about to pay my bill, he volunteered, “We take cash, check, credit or debit card. No chickens.” I’m in Indiana, mind you.

The Chicken Meme has legs. Or wings. Whatever.

@ManchuCandidate:
no
it is not my first. I have been having them with regularity since the very early 90s. started early because of a bad family history. hence my comment.
I was speaking from personal family experience.

my usual line is “I have a much higher tolerance for drugs than I do for pain. I do not want to feel this”. and I never have.

BREAKING: AZ Gov. Brewer signs the immigration bill. Says at signing ceremony that she expects the rest of the country is watching Arizona waiting for someone here to make a mistake “so they can get face time” on tv.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: No surprise there. She can throw it to the courts to determine the legality of the bill and bad guys get to blast “activist judges” the DOJ and the Eagle over the litigation.

Meanwhile, my Latino/Hispanic/Mexican friends are calling for a boycott of AZ. I say: Brown Flood. Have a major Latino event there every fucking weekend TFN.

I believe there is a 90 day window before the act takes effect. That will permit my Mexicano Iraq War vet buddy who took one for George Bush to drive across the state with his pregnant Anglo wife and their infant. They’re coming back to New Mexico, where we treat people like fucking human beings for the most part.

@redmanlaw: Yep to all that. There was no way she wasn’t going to sign it considering the flack she’s gotten from her primary opponents on the far right. It’s got 90 days until it goes into effect, but I’m sure the first lawsuit will be filed before then. I’ve heard the usual legal suspects have already started preparing the complaints.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ:
Who’s going to serve the old people their dinner and water their gardens?

One thing is that shit like this antagonizes tinted folks to stand up and fight. Way to go AZ GOP and antagonize the fastest growing segment of AZ (and who sort of liked you guys at one point, too.)

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ:
Obama responds:

Even before Governor Brewer signed the law at a 4:30 p.m. news conference here, President Obama strongly criticized it.

He said the failure of officials in Washington to act on immigration would open the door to “irresponsibility by others.” He said the Arizona bill threatened “to undermine basic notions of fairness that we cherish as Americans, as well as the trust between police and our communities that is so crucial to keeping us safe.”

I’m assuming that somebody will be assigned to the airport to arrest all the Hispanic baseball players on every team flying in to play the Diamondbacks. That’s about 2/3 of the National League.

@ManchuCandidate: Whoever is doing it now, I suppose. Most illegal immigrants took off for greener economic pastures a while ago.

Listen, this isn’t the first anti-immigrant measure that’s been signed after much hemming and hawing and threats to take people out at the polls. There was the employer sanctions legislation, the no-bail for illegals legislation, the no in-state tuition bill, the National Guard at the border executive order. All of these “tough on illegals” measures were supposed to fix the problem and get a whole lotta Latinos to vote the GOP out. Neither has happened. The only reason there are fewer illegal aliens here is because the economy is in the shitter. The GOP here isn’t worried at all because they’ve had free rein to do as they please and they will continue to do so as long as legislative districts are gerrymandered and Arpaio-loving, 4pm-dinner-eating Maricopa County types outnumber brown people in Tucson.

Oh, and the Guard at the border? That was Napolitano’s doing. Yeah, same shit different day.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: Coming soon: “A Day Without Mexicans II – A State Without Mexicans.”

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ:
do you think Hayworth can win if he is the nominee.

I love dogs

Dog Leads Rescuers to Burning Building

“I just told him, ‘We need to get help,’ and then that’s the last time I seen him,” Heinrichs told the News-Tribune. “I didn’t train him or nothing. He just took off and went and did what he did. … He was just being a good dog.”

It’s a good thing Buddy sprung into action because trooper Terrence Shanigan, who was responding to the call about a fire, was having trouble with his vehicle’s global positioning system, which wasn’t working properly, reports the News-Tribune. “Shanigan, who almost took the long way around the neighborhood, came across Buddy on Caswell Loop Road,” reports the News-Tribune. “The dog took off, and acting on a hunch, Shanigan followed the dog down a side road.”

show me a cat that can do that

Good thing it isn’t turkeys, right RML?

@Capt Howdy: Yes. There is only one person running on the Dem side and he’s a one term Tucson councilman and professional student. I think DeConcini was the last person south of the Gila to be elected to statewide federal office and that was in the 1970s after a bruising GOP primary weakened their nominee. However, DeConcini ran as a conservative and had name recognition as the son of a prominent state AG and Arizona Supreme Court justice. No one’s ever heard of this Glassman guy. Except me. I’ve met him and he’s a lightweight. I fear all is lost if McCain doesn’t pull this out.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ:
that surprises me because he is demonstrably batshit crazy.
I hope you are wrong but on the other hand how much worse could it be than with McStain talking a centrist game and voting as right wing as you can vote.

@Capt Howdy: Cats have been known to attack intruders who threaten their human/food source. In this case, of course, they would have let the guy burn and then snacked on his tasty roasted flesh. They look out for #1.

@Capt Howdy: Batshit crazy is in vogue out here.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: The next time the teabaggers rally in Arizona, the law enforcement officials who opposed the bill (and I see that there was a big split), should go to the rally and demand every teabagger produce his or her proof of citizenship papers and take them to jail if they don’t have them. It’s not like your average teabagger has a passport.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ:
It’s a dry crazy, right?

She signed it.

Holy threadjacks, Batman, Facebook is down! Call out the National Guard!

@Tommmcatt Loves The Giant Floating Head: A bearded male in season within 40 yards is fair game.

Wait . . . that sounds kind of funny . . .

@IanJ:
I hope is stays down

I am so sorry I ever got involved with that pile of shit.
every stupid classless fuckwit I ever knew or went to school with has tracked me down and sent me a friend request. between that and the “hugs” and “angels” and god knows what else.

stay down. please.

@IanJ: The Douchecopalypse!!!!

@redmanlaw:
actually its any legal male in 100 yards

@Mistress Cynica: In this case, of course, they would have let the guy burn and then snacked on his tasty roasted flesh. All the while looking for a new sucker to rub up against and pull into her feline web. Catz R kewl, word.

@Nabisco:
cats are kewl. I have one.
Jedi is very cool
but I wouldnt expect him to pull me from my burning house as I would totally expect either of my dogs to do.

btw
anyone interested in synthetic weed this is the place to go

I recommend Demon.

@Capt Howdy: That link wasn’t coming up, but here’s the dashboard video* of the dog leading the deputy to the burning building.

*Click on the top .wmv file listed

@IanJ: It’s not officially down until it shows up on TechMeme.

@nojo: It’s back up now. May have been a local-to-Seattle outage, but it didn’t last more than about 5 minutes.

@Capt Howdy: “A how how how how how.” – John Lee Hooker

Hey, for only $17,600 I can get my picture taken with Barbara Boxer and Black Eagle next month! Does that include two drinks?

@redmanlaw: And the season lasts all year round, amIright?

@SanFranLefty:
really
it works for me
this should work

the original link was to neatorama

@SanFranLefty:

I’d hold out for a badly-overcooked chicken breast and some warmish mashed potatoes.

@SanFranLefty:
wow
it should include a reacharound

And here we go…

Protesters at the capitol throwing water bottles at police. Cops in riot gear w/ pepper spray arriving at the scene.

http://twitter.com/arizonaguardian

@SanFranLefty: Cash bar only. But I hear you get strippers if you go to the Republican fundraiser.

@Pedonator: Depends on what you’re going after.

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: Shall we set today’s date as the start of the civil war?

@Capt Howdy:

Those prices are a little ridiculous, especially since they’re obviously intended for resale. If the store’s paying $11/g (the 50-packs of 1g), the price after markup will barely be cheaper than what I’ve *heard* the going rate for locally grown high-grade is.

@Mistress Cynica: To be more specific, they’re Asian MTF tranny strippers at the GOP receptions.

@redmanlaw:

They’d fuck with you if you crossed the State Line, right?

God in heaven, I am so sorry. I am ashamed to be an American today, and anyone who knows me knows what a serious thing it is for me to say that.

This is a blow to your rights, my partner’s rights, JNOV’s rights…the list goes on and on. The mistake that we might make right now is to cast this in an impersonal light, but we shouldn’t forget: This is personal. The rights of every single person of color in this country have been curtailed. It’s not the first time this has happened since Jim Crow, but it is certainly one of the worst.

This will not stand.

@redmanlaw: maybe not. Turns out the cops were arresting a guy who was stealing from protesters but the protesters thought the crackdown on brown had begun so they started chanting and throwing water bottles. The police told organizers what was going on and they calmed the protesters down. Only one arrest made. There are more peaceful protests in Tempe and Mesa.

I want to be sure I understand this correctly. Some of the same people who have been screaming about the intrusion of bigger government into our lives have now created a state law requiring the law enforcement officers to detain anyone suspected of being an illegal immigrant. Because illegal immigrants can come in all colors, shapes and sizes this means that anyone venturing outdoors in Arizona must carry documentation at all times to prove their citizenship.

Congratulations to AZ for leading the US into depths we’ve never seen here before. The Deputy Mayor of Phoenix told Jon Stewart he was advising the police to demand citizenship papers from everyone they stopped to avoid lawsuits for discrimination, which he said they couldn’t afford. Are forged birth certificates available on e-bay or Craigs List yet?

@Dave H: I have a few friends who carry their passports at all times since they don’t have a driver’s license to produce…for reasons we won’t discuss…so the eye-leets who leave US ‘Merika from time to time will be able to produce proof of citizenship. It’s the teabaggers who have never left who will be getting questioned. Ha!

My folks are in SoCal right now and headed back to Texas. They may have to take the long way home via Nevada (ugh!) and Utah (ugh! ugh), what with my dad’s hippie Jew-man beard and my mom looking all black Irish and dark skinned.

But srsly, this is so totally fucked beyond belief. What are they going to do with all the illegals they stumble upon? Put them in camps? Welcome to 1936 Germany, courtesy of the Arizona GOP.

@Dave H: Don’t you get it? This is all code for WHITE FUCKING POWER! WHITE FUCKING POWER! WHITE FUCKING POWER! No taxes to support a government or government services that involve ANYONE DARKER THAN ME! We’re hours away from the teabaggers, militianmen, neonazis and jesufascist fusing into one twisted white supremacist Adkisson/Stack/McVeigh Army.

i had the the most interesting dinner last night talking to a US coast guard who was sitting next to me at the bar. he told me a tale of 150 haitians in a boat that was hand made, and falling apart by the time it reached T&C water last week. the capacity was a third of what it was carrying…poor brown people. he explained how he and his buddies had to wrestle them in the water and all manner of horrors. incidents like this have been going on long before the earthquake.
my question to him, why is the US protecting the coast? where the hell is the queen? the royals don’t have a coast guard? how about canada?
thought you would like to know where else our tax dollars go.

@baked:
If we “owned” the T&C then yeah. It would also be the most popular CG post in Canada City.

From what I read this is a joint USCG/DEA operation that helps the Bahamas and T&C dealing with drugs and illegal immigration. Sort of a “deport/intercept’em over there and not over here” kind of thing.

Note to Arizona GOP: when you fuckers run out of water in a few years, don’t try coming to California. We’ll have the CHP at the ports of entry with orders to shoot on sight.

In other crazee people news:

Minnesota Republicans make a bid to reclaim the “batshit-craziest” title

They’ve introduced a bill that would declare Minnesota “sovereign” and require a 2/3rds vote in the state Congress to approve federal laws. Apparently Ms. Bachmann’s been sharing whatever it is she’s been smoking.

@ManchuCandidate:
you are 100% correct. a joint (heh) operation with the DEA and lets get ’em there, in the bahamas before the drugs get any closer.
it’s like we’re still fighting in cambodia. ronnie, nancy, you LOST.
but these people weren’t drug runners, they were escaping a nightmare, they barely had pants on, let alone bales of cocaine!
and yes, he told me T&C is their fave deployment :-)
some of them do get in, starving, penniless. so instead of having an immigration policy they deal with me. carrying on because my fucking kayak was stolen right off my dock due to cruel, insane and ineffective policies. sounds familiar huh.