Days Eight & Nine — At The Half

Sorry for no update yesterday.  Real life interfered. 

Well, we have our first party foul of the Games — Scotty Lago forced back to the States, after the publication of racy photos of him with a woman getting an up-close-and-personal look at his snowboarding bronze medal.  As you know: achievement and dedication are American hallmarks, celebrated especially during the Games.  Another grand American tradition: insufferable prudishness.  God bless America! (Sniff.)

So: what else have we learned?  Team USA-USA-USA has done well thus far — the notable exception being the curlers, who have disappointed.  (The men’s skip got benched.  That’s how bad they have been.)  USA Men’s hockey could win their preliminary group by beating the Canadians tomorrow.  Canada, more broadly, has four golds, and eight medals total.  That’d be enough to call it a successful run at the end of the day, and the Games are only half done.  Great Britain has an individual gold (wimmin’s skeleton, yesterday) — their first in 30 years — and thus can go home happy.  Norway and Sweden are doing well in nordic events — this, of course, is a recording.  Figure skating remains impossible to understand.  And Stephen Colbert is in real danger of becoming overexposed.

Today, then.  The wimmin have their Super-G tonight, and there’s more speedskating.  Lotsa cross-country in the afternoon, along with freestyle aerial skiing.  Curling and hockey throughout as normal.


Marginally related, due to the massive commercialization at the Games:


It’s apparently up for an Oscar, and is pretty unique – it’s an short action flick, with the twist that nearly everything is a corporate logo of some sort. And really, how can you go wrong arming Ronald McDonald with an AK-47?

What is the point of winning an Olympic medal (and frankly having those abs – yum!) if you can’t get a simulated blow job in public every now and then. And if he wants a real one, he can feel free to call.

This is the downside of everyone and they mama having a cell phone camera. TEAM SNOW BOARD DUDE!


Just kidding.

Some nail biting among the idiots up here because Canada City expected MORE. I’m proud of all the athletes that competed and that won, but the dimwits at VanOC thought they’d win many many many more medals because Canada City is so AWESOME and they blew bajillions of taxpayer dollars to make it all possible. Like the rest of the world would let us…

I got into an argument with my housemate about Canada City being more patriotic or U-S-A!ish. I’d rather be quiet dull polite boring Canada City than get all “in your face” flag waving. Just more a sign of major personal insecurity than anything (and I’d never accuse anyone here of being that way.)

One should be proud of their nation, just not be a dick about it.

I’m mesmerized by curling. And Chris Plys is hawt – in that Midwestern goth sort of way.

Re: curling, I’m no expert, but the commentary on the tail end of the USA/France match gave one the impression that the win was kind of a big deal, no?

@homofascist: What is the point of winning an Olympic medal … if you can’t get a simulated blow job in public every now and then.

It would certainly make award ceremonies more interesting. Especially with your national anthem being played. And Bob Costas describing the action.

@nojo: It would have to be the Jimi Hendrix version of the SSB. Nothing else would set the proper mood.

What did they expect would happen when they designed the medals to look like large, shiny cock rings?

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: I thought they’d found a way to recycle all those CD-ROMs.

@homofascist: My thoughts exactly – if he’d been French, the country would have given him another medal. Our fucking Protestant forebears …

mellbell: The thing is that the USA men have totally stunk — bad shots at precisely the worst times. They won today against the Swedes — barely. And they have to run the table (including a win against the Canucks) to have even a sniff at a medal. Getting a win against France was a positive must for ’em.

@chicago bureau: Ah, ok. I read that as underdogs, not underperforming.

Honestly, I never really paid attention to curling until, like, two days ago. Now Mom and I agree that it’s the best sport ever. In any case, yeah, our men’s team sucks. Like I said, I’m fairly new to the sport, but even I could see the difference in skill levels between the women’s Canada/Denmark game and the men’s US/Sweden game.

As far as the snowboarding thing goes, maybe it’s just because I’m so young, but I really don’t see what the big deal is. It’s not like they were photos of him hitting a bong or flashing a cop or something. People have sex drives. People take goofy pictures of themselves. Just because you’ve participated in the Olympics does not make you super human or something. I mean, next thing you know, you’ll be seeing Evan Lysacek giving his medal back because a guy he knew broke into his bathroom while he was taking a dump, snapped a few photos, then posted them on the internet.

@homofascist: Fuck that. In fact, what is the use of winning a medal if you can’t take out a harem of groupies and pestork yourself into a trembling coma on the course where you won it – after everyone goes home for the day, of course. Then light out for an evening of drunken debauchery in the hot tub with a fresh cadre of groupies and a savage feast of barbequed lamb, then commandeering a car for a drive into town to hit every fucking bar to announce to on and all that you are “an Olympian! Sit on my face Vancouver!” If anything, the US OC should have censured the kid for teasing the girl and not giving her the good news right then and there as a gentleman and olympian should.

TJ/ Do the Aussie wimmin speed skaters have awesome bodysuits, or what?

OK, when you see a skier you never heard of from Slovenia on the tape delay coverage you think it’s ’cause the crash involved flames and loss of body parts but this woman goes out and snatches the silver from the grasp of America’s Sweetheart (TM) Lindsey Vonn. The Austrian woman who won the Super G gold was hard.core.

I am not down with the curling. I watched “Red Dawn” on G4 instead while handloading some rifle ammo today. Wolverines!

Off to the ancestral land tomorrow for gun inspection by the War Chief’s office with Son of RML. I’ll see about shooting a picture of us in traditional dress packing the heat.

@redmanlaw: There’s only one channel with Olympic coverage over here, and it has been all speed skating, all morning. One of the Korean dudes made a desperate grab at the Canadian brother who was trailing Ohno in the semis, but didn’t get his skate across.

I was in Manchu’s ancestral lands when the Ohno-Korea grudge match started up, so I dig this stuff.

What did the many Mrs. Grundys expect him to do? Shove the young woman away, then endure decades of speculation about his sexual orientation?

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