Naked Senator: Teabagger Kamikaze Just a Patriot Frustrated With Satanic Kenyan

Tora! Tora! Tora!

Freedom! Freedom! Freedom!

Pornographic magazine model Sen Scott Brown (R-Raytheon) went on Neil Cavuto’s Fox News hatecast yesterday to rationalize the teabagger kamikaze attack on the IRS building in Austin, describing it as a precipitate of the opacity and diabolical nature of the current administration.

When Cavuto asked Brown to comment on teabagger kamikaze Joe Stack’s daylight attack on an IRS office in a single-engine plane that left at least one person dead and a number wounded, the naked senator went for the narcissistic angle first and then the psychopathic.

“I can just sense, not only in my election but since being here in Washington, people are frustrated. They want transparency. They want their elected officials to be accountable and open and talk about the things that are affecting their daily lives. I am not sure if there is a connection. I certainly hope not,” the naked senator babbled.

Translation: Patriot dissidents flying airplanes into government buildings are just a normal and natural precipitate of America’s captivity in the hands of a satanic marxist Kenyan interloper.

Bizarrely, Cavuto prefaced his question with a summarization of teabagger kamikaze pilot Joe Stack’s last manifesto, a deranged rant against the IRS code relating to contractors, his wasted life as a self-pitying loser and the usual litany of teabagger grievances, and called it “crazy stuff” even though most of it comprises about half the content of Fox News feature shows a la Beck and O’Reilly.

Predictably, the tin soldier, thief and porn model Brown used the event as an opportunity to pour more gasoline on the fires of psychopathic partisanship, to legitimize if not glorify radical rightwing violence and shower himself with laurels as the first elected senator to represent the politics of pure rage.

Very senatorial, Senator Fuckface!

Question for the Stinquers: When will a Republican stand the fuck up and call out the crazies for what they are?


Since Lincoln Chaffee is no longer a Senator, and Jeffords and Specter switched parties, I’m going to say “Never” in response to your question.

FCS – oh, and har, har, har, let’s make jokes about the Texas suicide attack at the CPAC conference.

Domestic terrorism is really fucking hilarious. Just ask the 38-year-old guy with second degree burns on 25% of his body and his family, friends, and coworkers.

Or the family of the 67-year-old man killed by the selfish prick.

Or the hundreds of people in the building who experienced a plane crashing into their office and those nearby who witnessed the suicide attack.

I’m sure the CPAC crowd were howling and in stitches on 9/11. Oh, and Oklahoma City – that was a knee slapper when the day care center got the brunt of the angry patriot’s bomb.

Motherfuckers. They’re lower than the piece of dog shit smeared on the bottom of my shoe.

When? As soon as they develop a conscience and simple human decency. So as SFL said, never.

Hey TJ this is kinda cool:

“My name is Andrea Fay Friedman. I was born with Down syndrome. I played the role of Ellen on the “Extra Large Medium” episode of Family Guy that was broadcast on Valentine’s day. Although they gave me red hair on the show, I am really a blonde. I also wore a red wig for my role in ” Smudge” but I was a blonde in “Life Goes On”. I guess former Governor Palin does not have a sense of humor. I thought the line “I am the daughter of the former governor of Alaska” was very funny. I think the word is “sarcasm”.

In my family we think laughing is good. My parents raised me to have a sense of humor and to live a normal life. My mother did not carry me around under her arm like a loaf of French bread the way former Governor Palin carries her son Trig around looking for sympathy and votes.”


If Palin responds it will seal her reputation as the worst political strategist since Dan Quayle.

Please, God, I don’t ask for much… let her respond. Please.

Thoughts from commenters at re: Austin plane crash –

“If this were April 15 I could see rushing to get a tax return in, but jeez man you still have plenty of time.”

“Is it bad that I don’t feel bad about an IRS building being hit? “

That is pretty much the issue with Sarah and “special” fambli. Campaign props.

In Canada City, much loathed PM Brian Mulrooney tried to do the same with his kids, in particular, his very attractive daughter when he was trying to revive his approval ratings. It backfired when a satire magazine known as Frank decided to run a “Deflower Caroline Mulrooney Contest.” It shocked and upset many of the upper crust and the polite crowd with “I never.” On the other hand, it pretty much single handed stopped Canada City Pols from ever using their kids as campaign props unless they wanted to be subjects of ridicule.

Note: the winner of the contest was her husband, the son of US Liberal Lewis Lapham.

The funnies thing is the way that the RW appears to think that attacking an IRS building because you’re “frustrated” is OK and understandable, but then simultaneously fails to understand how our continued military adventures in the Middle East might make people over there “frustrated”. No, *those people* clearly just “hate our freedom”, whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean…

Come on guys, you know the score by now:

Foreigners blowing up buildings in US = terrorists
Americans blowing up buildings in US = patriots

@Serolf Divad:

You forgot the caveat to your last point:
Americans of Muslim religion and/or Arab ethnicity = terrorists



Americans who Terrorize Their Political Opponents= “christians”

@Tommmcatt Say Relax:

It’s White GOP christian Americans who use terror on their political opponents = “good.”

Anyone else = “bad.”

‘Cause terror’s baad, mmkay?

@texrednface: I know. This is their moderate? Hey, if he really wants to be topical why doesn’t he point at Joe Stack and ‘take a page from his playbook’ and smash the window out of big government with a fucking Cessna?

Tim’s probably too much of a pussy to do it.

@nojo: Not all of us get to sleep in until 11 am Sandy Eggo time, m’dear. ;-)

Seems our Internecine Labeling Argument yesterday was completely moot: Doesn’t matter whether the pilot himself was a teabagger — he’s being adopted as one anyway.

@SanFranLefty: Sleeping in is my substitute for health insurance.

@nojo: He would be labeled as such in any event and, hey, when you’re chartered to bring on the apocalyptic vulgarity there are certain memes which you just have to claim as your own.

@ManchuCandidate: No shit. Guy’s as constructive and wholesome as the Talibunny.

@FlyingChainSaw: A teabagging suicide-bomber hero is something to be.


Check this the fuck out – there is a Twitter aggregator feed called PoliticalTwits that lists the tweets of one BaRRackObama:

@FlyingChainSaw: OMG. I wonder how long that will last…

@FlyingChainSaw: There’s an old link to it on HuffPo, but I can’t (quickly) determine who else uses the aggregator as a reference.

But we can always hope for that wonderful moment in the future when someone runs with a barrackobama tweet as the real thing.

@FlyingChainSaw: Oh, I know. Meant how long before the Political Twits people get wise.

Sorry, no, he was not a ‘bagger. If anything, I suppose Paultard might be the closest, but even that doesn’t quite fit. Only about 10% of Americans have what could be generously called a coherent political belief system, which is one of many reasons why everything voters want is completely self-contradictory and illogical.

He was just overwhelmed and self-pitying. Strange though, that in a 3,000 word suicide note/diatribe (too long!), he somehow missed managing to explain exactly why he shouldn’t have to pay taxes as a contractor or whatever. Kamikaze Fail.

@Original Andrew: No, he’s not a teabagger, but it’s too late for that. Pro-pilot Facebook groups sprang up immediately yesterday, and CPACers are treating him as something of a hero. We’ve reached Print the Legend very quickly with this one.

@Original Andrew: Seems to me he was a narcissistic child who not get EVERYTHING he wanted for Christmas.

Pretty much a teabagger in my book.


He did commit several unforgivable sins, without question. Using “insure” vs. ensure pissed me off the most.

@Original Andrew: Maybe the rant was the problem. Reading it sure made me want to kill myself.

We stand corrected, Chainsaw. At least one Republican has denounced this guy AND used the t-word. Granted, he’s one of the Congresscritters from Austin, but it’s a start.

U.S. Rep. Michael McCaul, R-Austin, who attended an afternoon briefing, said the whole affair smacked of terrorism.

“When you fly an airplane into a federal building (to kill federal employees), it sounds like (terrorism) to me,” said McCaul, a member of the House Homeland Security Committee.

U.S. Rep. Lloyd Doggett, D-Austin, in a prepared statement, also called the plane crash “a cowardly act of domestic terrorism,” and said Stack’s apparent Web site message “reflects the steadily increasing flow of ‘the government is out to get me’ paranoia.”

Doggett also had harsh words for comments praising Stack that were posted on several Facebook Fan sites that emerged Thursday.

@SanFranLefty: Asshole calls himself a Republican? Lemme peek. . . one sec. Actually, Lefty, the R called it terrorism but it was up to the demrat to connect it to tea-baggeresque paranoia. So, I posit we are still waiting for a Republican to call out the wackos for what they are: hand servants to domestic terrorism and treason.

@FlyingChainSaw: Well, let’s see where the CPAC whackjobs are…

During one point in the debate, Barr condemned the right’s call to try terror suspects exclusively in military tribunals and defended plans to try suspects in civilian courts. He then insisted that waterboarding is torture, which prompted the crowd to start booing.

Nope. Not there yet.

Yes, it’s always the woman’s fault.
In Wingnutistan, everything is everybody else’s fault – everyone but poor little Joe the Pilot’s fault.

@texrednface: This all has verisimilitude. It is true. If YOU call the IRS, you will be treated like someone who needs help. They live and die by voluntary compliance and they can’t get enough stories out there telling folks, ‘Hey, they weren’t so bad. Waived the fines and worked it out.’ State revenue agencies are far nastier, also true. IRS has seen it all. If he showed up and said he was blind sided dollars to donuts they’d have worked something out. I’ve sent people who’ve been years without filing, years and years, and their spouses up in arms in fear, to the IRS with nothing but really boring stories about payment schedules set up and, in one case, a rebate because the clown was actually due the earned income tax credit. Personally, I’ve tangled with them a couple of times about oversights and won one out of two times and both were my fault for sloppy record keeping. The second time was nickel-dime and I didn’t even ask for the stock to be sold (it was acquired by a holding company) and the proceeds never left the account. I just whined that it was an honest oversight and I was a nice person. That worked.

Hey, Barrack fixed the background on his twitter account:

Very presidential!

@FlyingChainSaw: The biggest complainer I know personally about taxes, is a guy who was a building contractor who will, in the next sentence, brag about how he evaded taxes.

But today I had an even more perfect moment of irony. Today I sent Mrs. prom the lyrics to Nirvana’s All Apologies, suggesting that our dynamic has been that she places me constantly in situations where I am always apologizing. I had to apologize for suggesting that she is always making me apologize. I am amused, greatly, by this, it makes me love her for her, well, I don’t know what, but I am not angry, its kinda amazing.

@FlyingChainSaw: The trick always, with all bureaucrats, is to acknowledge their authoritay, and play well-meaning, bumbling supplicant, it is the only strategy that works.

Works with wives and loved ones, too.

but then you are always apologizing, and resentment builds up. Hmm, gonna have to find a solution to that part.

@Promnight: I’ve found the best way to deal with bureaucrats, court clerks, tech/customer support, etc is to empathize with them about all the dolt like me they have to deal with and how rude and horrible everyone is. It’s not 100% effective, and sometimes requires considerable acting skills, but it’s the best method I’ve found. Sometimes I’ll even believe what I’m saying.

@Mistress Cynica: Best way to deal with all humans you meet, in any situation, is to empathize with the row they have to hoe, walk a mile in their shoes, etc. Get out of your own head and your issues and always remember, that anyone and everyone you deal with, every day, may be dealing with worse shit than you, and give them some slack, always.

@Mistress Cynica: I think thats a lengthy way of saying “don’t be an asshole.”

Now I have to go tell Mrs, that I was an asshole and will try to remember not to bee an asshole in the future. Fucking all apologies, but you know, we are all by default assholes, self-interest is the default, and it does require constant mindfulness not to be an asshole, and well, dammit, being all apologies, all the time, is really probably what I and most people should be, most of the time.

@Promnight: Depends. I don’t think anyone will be fooled by an obsequious grin and purposefully scuffling, apologetic mien. Being plain helps most of the time. Often a bureaucrat wants to get you off the phone or out of their face without understanding what you need done and in that case you need to use the most precise and direct language possible to cut through the fog of non-stop administrivia, get your stuff taken care of or get best advice on an alternative service channel. Especially in the states as a lot of bureacratic work has been reduced to punching repetitious sequences in a limited number of applications. They’re literally stunned and shell-shocked by the crushing demand of higher transaction turnover, and almost completely powerless. The average floor walker in, say, a city department store 30 years ago had a grip on floor inventory, merchandise coming in and the relative ages and sizes of customers and their kids. Now all that intelligence has been (so the MBAs think) devolved to software. Big lie. You have to be prepared to defend yourself and parse badly designed service platforms and forge and modify an escalation strategy on the fly. But, you are right, niceness counts.

@FlyingChainSaw: Oh, FCS, this is all I do, I was way oversimplifying, I am a lobbyist, all I do is stroke bureacrats, and yes, all you say is true also. Oh, its not so bad, you know, its really just trying to inform them. I mean lobbying, most of my time is truly spent simply trying to inform them of real world facts that they know nothing of. And most of the time I am dealing with either lifer middle-management policy people, or, a completely different world, political appointees, either the Administrator or Chief Panjandrum or whatever, who will be there 2 years max, and these are so completely different animals, and to my dismay nowadays they are so often late-20s, early-30s campaign worker assholes with no conception of the real world, and so fucking full of themselves.

But when dealing with government workers, at all levels, an surprisingly as much at the highest as at the lowest, is their fear. They are all so afraid of making a fucking decision. Even a fucking no-brainer call on an obvious interpretation, noone wants to stick their fucking neck out a millimeter, noone wants to make any decision, ever, for fear that, as inevitably will happen, some other fuckwad will criticize that decision.

And then, sometimes, I have to turn back into the fucking lawyer I am, and I have to threaten to sue their ass, because, though bringing a prerogative writ or a mandamus, or even asking a court for an interpretation, scares the shit out of them, too, they don’t want to be the one that provoked the lawsuit.

yeah, I am a lobbyist, so what about it.

@Original Andrew: Definitely not a teabagger. Probably closer to many of us in his political beliefs.

I didn’t see anything in his rant about refusing to pay taxes at all. In fact, he seems to have been unhinged by the fact that he went to a professional, the professional made mistakes (or deliberately hid income), and then he was fucked over.

I had a similar experience last year, my ass was clenched tighter than a threadless screw in a rusty nut for weeks because of it. I ended up paying a different professional about $1K to straighten out the situation, as well as $4K to the IRS because they refunded more than they should have a few years before.

Which brings us to the fact that, if you have anything other than a simple W-2 or 3 to copy information from, into your tax filing, it is extremely difficult to know what the fuck the IRS wants you to do. This is why we have tax professionals, tax lawyers even, and CPAs. And you can pay them to account for your finances, but still it isn’t enough.

The IRS can come after you years later and put you through hell, and there’s nothing you can do except spend hours, days, weeks educating yourself and probably hire another professional in order to plead that you’ve done everything possible to settle the fucking matter.

If we’re going to have a nation, a government, to provide infrastructure and basic security and such, I don’t mind paying taxes in theory. I do very much mind the way my taxes are spent, but I’ve been pretty meticulous about paying them regardless.

But I find basically not much in Joe Stack’s rant that I would disagree with. The main exception being his decision to take others out with himself.

@Promnight: What the hell is a mandamus, it sounds awesome?

@Promnight: Also, I just got my ISI whipper and I’m gonna try this at home.

@Promnight: Even a fucking no-brainer call on an obvious interpretation, noone wants to stick their fucking neck out a millimeter, noone wants to make any decision, ever, for fear that, as inevitably will happen, some other fuckwad will criticize that decision.

Are you talking about a DMV clerk or John Yoo?

After all, the DMV clerk may actually have to face charges.

@FlyingChainSaw: They’re literally stunned and shell-shocked by the crushing demand of higher transaction turnover, and almost completely powerless.

Reminds me of Psychic… Powerless… Another Man’s Sac …

…but since I can’t find a Butthole Surfers video from that fabulous debacle, here’s this.

@Promnight: Yup, I’m sure the Mrs dug getting the lyrics of a song that includes the line “I’m married/I’m buried.”

@Pedonator: Colleague, spent a large chunk of his life consulting big banks until he found a lot of what they were asking for by the mid1990s wee recipes for blackjacking their own customers. We were talking one day about mispayment of the taxes on his mortgage, likely by the servicing being sold to some shithouse operation staffed by the living dead. He finally got someone on the phone and knowing banks’ operational profile the way he did, ticked off a list of items that had to be audited and rationalized to corner the culprit, remediate the trouble and check if there was systemic faults in processing that had been introduced that needed to be corrected. Lady on the phone burst into tears. He apologized and she responded she knew he was right but that she can’t do any of that and has no one to even ask. It’s just an all day rush of frightened abused people she is supposed to shunt through some useless script and an escalation protocol that gets them ignored and abused in a different level. C told me later that she sound not just upset, she sounded disturbed, like really overwhelmed by the horror she saw the bank inflict and ignore systematically.

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