Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

Have a, um, burning question about industrial porn? Shoot it to iporn [at]

Will pubic hair ever make a comeback in the adult film industry?

Your question could not be more well timed and the answer is “yes.” In fact just this week Hustler announced that they are releasing a film called “The Bush Administration” which will feature nothing but girls with full on muffs. Fleshbot also came out with an entire feature this week on girls with lots of forest for fucking.

The truth is that there is more demand for girls with pubes now than there has been in years, so you should see a lot more of this stuff. The “bare down there” scene was actually sort of an accident to begin with. When Bush stole the 2000 election a lesbian group got the idea to shave off their pubes and mail them to the White House with little cards that read “No Bush” on them. A bunch of girls in the adult industry heard about this and decided to do the same thing. Then when they had their video shoots that week, obviously they didn’t have time to grow their pubes back. Producers liked the look — mostly because it made it easier for the tech folk to apply vaginal make up. Then, customers went gaga for it because they’d never seen it before and it became a trend.

But now that almost every girl is bare it’s become so mundane that dudes are actively looking for videos with normal pubed girls and the industry is responding. So, we’ve gotten Bush out of the White House and back in your porn where it belongs.

How did the Porn Industry feel about the election this week?

There were mixed responses. In general they are happy that Obama won, because they figure that it will put an end to the Federal harassment of dudes like Max Hardcore who was recently convicted of seriously bullshit obscenity charges. If a girl can’t consent to pee on a guy on camera, what can she consent to? I mean, sometimes a girl’s just gotta go!

On the other hand, Proposition K, which would have legalized licensed prostitution in California, got defeated — mostly because the gay marriage thing got all the press coverage and Prop K slipped under the radar. This is bad for everyone. Prostitution will always exist — the only question is can it be made safe for the call girls and rent boys and the customers. Legal, licensed prostitution means that the sex workers don’t need pimps and have much more incentive to insist on condoms — since they will get tested regularly and even the most mild STD would be enough to bounce your license.

Plus, legal prostitution discourages street trade, which is where the really bad shit in hookerland happens. Beyond that, the law in California is really hypocritical now. If I rent a camera and hire a girl to have sex with me in front of the camera and then post that video on the Internet for profit — that’s legal in California. But, if I pay that same girl for the same sexual acts, but don’t film it, that’s illegal. Riddle me that, Mr. Terminator? Beyond that, California is facing a budget crisis — imagine how much state revenue in sales taxes and licensing fees could have been generated?

The adult industry is also pissed off that bowing to federal pressure, Craigslist is now going to make sex workers provide a valid credit card when they post ads in the Erotic Services section. They think this will discourage Craigslist prostitution — because the FBI would be able to subpoena the names of the girls and boys anytime they want. What will really happen is a couple of dumb college boys and girls who haven’t figured out the change will get busted, while all the smart ones will simply post in Casual Encounters.

Can porn ever really be considered “educational?”

Yes. And I wish Dan Savage would watch some and learn something. Recently he wrote a column where he said that vaginas look like “spam.” If he ever watched a straight porn tape he’d learn that he was wrong.

He also insists that male bisexuality doesn’t exist. If he looked around the porn industry and noticed the thousands and thousands of examples of bisexual written erotica and video porn he’d realize just how fucking wrong he was. A dude isn’t going to pay money to watch male bisexual erotica if he doesn’t want to see dick and pussy. And if bisexual males didn’t exist the porn world wouldn’t bother marketing to them. You can lie to your friends about what your dick wants, but your video clerk knows the truth.


*sigh* Dan Savage… He’s always had a chip on his shoulder for bisexual guys ’cause one dumped him for a girl once. Don’t ask him to watch any porn involving women either, it’s pretty clear that vagina disgusts him and his attitudes obviously haven’t changed or mellowed in the ten or fifteen years he’s been writing his column. I’m glad the bush is back for porn, trimming up is okay but shaved up junk looks creepy, especially on dudes.

@drinkyclown: I really like Dan Savage but when he pulled that stunt at the Repug Convention a few years back all I could think was you won’t go near a vagina but you licked their doorknobs? Ew.

Also: Will a modicum of chest hair ever make a cumback in the adult film industry? I’m all for a tidy manscaping trim now and then, and best pubes forward and all that, but really, do the porn producers think every dirty old prevert is into twink?

@Pedonator: Yikes! You would think that that would just make you sicker, plus if he was really hardcore he would have given dude the flu by making out with him!

As for the hair, bear porn is where all the fur is at! Mmm hairy bellies galore, they do for me what boobies do for straight guys.

@drinkyclown: DS making out with Gary Bauer? Dude, I will never forgive you for that image.

@drinkyclown: Is that a Cetacean Unicorn? You are forgiven.

Ride, Barry, ride!

Thread jack, because although I am as Irish as Barack, but I love those people, they do love to drink, and sing, and their is something about their voices, do listen to this:

Just wish he was wearing a cowboy hat, Wranglers with a big-ass belt buckle and roping gloves. Mmmm…I bet our President-Elect has a bit of hair on his chest.

@Promnight: I’m almost as Irish as German! That could be the new national anthem. Except…O’Reilly? Do we really have to claim him as one of our own?

@drinkyclown: This is on the topic of Narwhales. My older, oldest, brother, on getting out of the Navy in 1970, (my father had sent him there to avoid the draft, he spent his time on a carrier in the mediterranean) found a job in the restaurant that My dad worked for. And the owner of this restaurant also owned a restaurant on Prince Edward Island, Canada City. The highlights of his career as a seafood chef in PEI were that he cooked a meal for HRH Queen Elizabeth II, he said that was trippy, her guards observed all and tasted all, to ensure no poisoning, and he impregnated a local girl. And a marriage was hastily arranged, I think her clan of canucks would have killed him had he not gone along, a good old fashioned shotgun wedding.

And at the age of, I really hardly know, must have been 1972 or 3, 11 or 12 year old Promnight found himself in a farmhouse on PEI on the night the happy couples families were getting to know one another.

The bride’s brother was in the RCMP, and spent his time in the far north among the eskimos, and somewhere along his travels, the eskimos had given him a real live unicorn horn, a narwhale tusk, about 7 feet long, gleaming ivory, spiraled, it is simply impossible that the unicorn legend did not arise from these tuskes occasionally finding their way to europe.

Anyway, the precociousness of the young prom had been bragged about much (I was very much an oddity in my family, what with reading and smarts and stuff, they looked at me like some strange creature that had landed among them) and after hearing the bragging about young Prom’s precocious intellect, the bride’s family set up a challenge, they were so sure I would be stumped, they fetched the narwhale tusk, displayed it to me, and said, “so smarty pants, what is this?” And I answered “Thats a narwhale tusk, wow, where did you get that?” I sure shut them potatoe farmers up.

Now they did not know that there were no books in my house, and I just read anything I could get my hands on, and at some point, one of my older sisters had stolen the WXYZ volume of the World Book Encyclopedia from the high school library, and I had read it cover to cover, and W includes whales, of course. If we’d had the whole encyclopedia, I’d have read the whole thing, but to this day, my general knowledge is best on topics starting with WXYZ. Welswichia, for example, I know all about that.

If they’d brought out an aardvark, I would have been stumped.

Life is just bizarre. Thats a high point from my life. Damn.

I recently watched the Tin Drum, well, most of it, because I just got too depressed, but I made it to the part of the mother’s full frontal. Holy moly she had some serious pubic hair. We brown ones don’t tend to be so hairy down there. I think I’ve been scarred for life.

@Promnight: That is awesome! Nawrwhales totally captured my attention from a young age, my favorite theory when I was little was that unicorns got left behind by Noah’s ark and evolved to adapt to aquatic life. For a “that’s sooo internet” take on the narwhal, zoom in and scroll down!!

@Promnight: To get this back on topic: does the Mountie wear his uniform whilst pestorking said local girl? I hope so, for, um, her sake.

And where can I buy some of those smarty pants? My fambly’s encyclopedia was missing the P-S volume.

Is anyone old enough to remember Hustler’s amateur porn Beaver Shots feature. Ugh. That was some scary shit. Not that I ever read it on a regular basis. Nope.

@Anon Porn King: FYI, you need to get your facts straight. “Prop K” was a SF-only ordinance, Initiative K, not Prop K, and not statewide, and I am so glad it failed because it would have also decriminalized pimping and johning and pandering, and my city is already a magnet for Asian and South American women trafficked here for the sex trades. And thanks to the decriminalization of drugs in my city, drug dealers take BART here every day to sell drugs in the Tenderloin. We don’t need more decriminalization here. It’s bad enough as it is.

I have several friends who work full-time trying to get U-visas for SF sex workers, they do not need more work. And Measure K, for no apparent reason, would have completely defunded this great program that Kamala Harris (our DA) has going on that is a first time diversion program for Johns and is used as a model program around the world. That was a totally gratuitous part of the measure, but not surprising giving the sleazeballs that were funding the measure.

I have worked with our DA’s office. Women arrested for prostitution are never prosecuted unless they too are pimping out younger women. But our DA’s office does go after the Asian drug lords who ship in women from central China to work in the massage parlors. Measure K would have made those traffickers above the (local) law. The feds could still nail them, assuming they’re not too busy with Barry Bonds’ steroids or undocumented teenagers at our juvenile hall.

And who funded Measure K? I’ll tell you – all the sleazeballs running the titty bars on Broadway and in Chinatown. I’m not going to interfere with their ability to do business within existing law, but I’m not going to stand for them dragging women in from Asia and Guatemala, let alone the 14 year old girls from China. And I’m not going to stand by as they try to change the law so they won’t be accountable for exploiting and trafficking women.

I see this shit going on every day going to work. Thank FSM that Measure K lost, and I’m as pro-sex as your next SF resident. But you know what, I don’t want Amsterdam’s redlight district next to my house, and if you’ve ever been to the red light district, it’s not a celebration of attenuated sexuality. It’s a bunch of sad-eyed and self-medicating women from Eastern Europe, Central Asia, and China. We don’t need that in my city, thank you very much.

@JNOV: I remember that. Shamefully. As a young’n I didn’t udderstand what the hubbub was about beavers.

@Pedonator: Neither did I, buy my ex-boyfriend sure liked it. Ick.

@SanFranLefty: Thank you. I couldn’t have said it nearly so well.

@SanFranLefty: (hesitating to go here…but…) Do you think maybe decriminalizing prostitution could result in better outcomes for prostitutes? I don’t know the details as you do about the specifics of Prop K. But in general, I believe in the decriminalization of prostitution. Of course I don’t want that to lead to increased sex-trafficking of unwilling and/or ignorant duped/doped young girls and boys being led to our shores for heinous servitude to some kind of pimp. But I always think this is like the War On Drugs, i.e., if you legalize it and regulate it and tax it maybe it will be better for all involved.

@JNOV: Hell yeah! They were so grainy and awful, you couldn’t possibly be as disgusted by the beaver hunt photos as by the Hustler features, they were in sharp focus, and damn, them girls all had sores and pimples and razor burn and all kind of scary shit going on down there.

Gotta admit, I hope I’m not weird, but I am 40-plus, way plus, and come from the age of hairy crotches, and when it comes to porn, I prefer 40-something with a bush. I frankly don’t want to be always fantasizing about barely legal, unobtainable, and frankly, not really that attractive, little girls.

I love women, not girls. Women are strong and confident, they are equals, with whom one enjoys mutual give and take and play between equals, not helpless sex objects. They have a confidence and a deep knowing way about them, that makes you wonder from the first time you see them, are you gonna be predator or prey, and even after decades, its still an open question.

The prevaling pathology among most hetero males seems to be that they want “to fuck” someone, to take, not give, to conquer, rather than surrenender to an experience that when its right should be bigger than either of you. “Sex” is not something you do to someone, its something that, when it happens, with another strong powerful secure soul, overcomes both of you and you just hang on and give up and surrender to it together, both of you in the grip of a primal force bigger then both of you. Its mutual release to something bigger than both of you.

Its not something you do TO someone.

But thats what most porn is, what some dude is doing to some compliant receptacle. Thats not sex, thats some guy masturbating, completely alone, using another person’s body as a sexual aid, a big human vibrator. There’s just no sex going on.

@Pedonator: Seems to me prostitution is inherently wrong for the reason I don’t like most porn, its about a man buying a woman, making the woman a commodity.

Yeah, we are all commodities, and we all sell what we got. And maybe even I have some vestigial sense that selling your body is somehow more shameful than selling your labor or your mind. There are tons of very young girls who have no skills or knowledge to sell who probably feel empowered by being able to use their sexuality to get morons to give them money. I’ve seen strippers in our tightly controlled strip clubs heer in Jersey, no nipples, no crotch, ever, no touching, who were obviously enjoying the carnie thrill of taking the rubes as guys stuck bills in their panties.

Thats probably how they get roped in. But then, after a few years, after starting to do sex for money, I really doubt its empowering anymore, and its nothing but exploitation, because the woman spreading her legs seems more often than not to be working under the control of someone else who skims the large part of the money.

And maybe the illegality adds to that, its because its illegal that they can be preyed on by pimps, yes, but I think even if it were legal there would still be pimps, and sad 30 year old girls who started out empowered and grew up enough to see that they were just used, and take drugs to numb it and die young.

If there were no shame, no judgment, about sex, it wouldn’t be this way. Noone would care that some women choose to make money providing some joy to those men who have no better outlet. If there were no shame and moral wierdness about sex, fewer men would need that, too. But as it is, legalization does not alter the moral stigma. Would you be more likely to bring a legal whore home to momma than you would bee to bring an illegal whore home to meet her now?

@Promnight: Um, not all prostitution is about a man buying a woman. But granted, that’s the predominant theme in prostitutional history.

I think the moral stigma is entirely wrapped up in a patriarchal system that treats women as others.

I truly don’t think selling sexual favors is any worse than selling your life shilling for industrial capitalism, morally. I’m a whore, you’re a whore, we’re all basically dirty nasty whores.

I think sexual congress is something of value, and in a capitalist society there should be no shame in selling something of value. I’m not endorsing capitalist society, but let’s just be honest about it.

Again, I’m not completely sure where I would have stood on Prop K, but in our ‘ConOfMe I don’t see any reason why people shouldn’t be able to sell whatever is worth buying without fear of prosecution and persecution.

@Pedonator: It’s a reasonable question, and I don’t have the expertise to answer it. Anyone familiar with Nevada laws and practice?

@Pedonator: But this wasn’t about decriminalizing prostitution. If you read the actual Measure, it was horrifying. At heart I am a modified libertarian – make the drugs and the sex free of criminal liability – but I’m a socialist too and I say regulate and tax the fuck out of it. Measure K would have done none of that.

But at the end of the day, there are several billion desperate women in the world. And I’m not a bad feminist to say that they shouldn’t be hauled into our country like 16th century African chattel to give hand jobs to law firm partners. There are women in India renting out their uterus (uteri?) to white infertile American women. Where do we draw the line? A kidney transplant? A rented uterus? A vagina? I have dedicated my life to the concept that each human on this earth is worthy of respect and to “allow” them to sell their body to the highest bidder – whether it’s for a fuck, a kidney, a uterus host, or worse – is horrifying to me. Maybe I am a prude, or I’m drawing my line in a place where my fellow liberals and progressives wouldn’t draw it.

But it wasn’t so long ago that our country and Constitution said that people from Africa were only 3/5 a person, and should be viewed under Property law, not Human Rights law. So maybe I’m sensitive to what a person can freely sell of her or himself.

If more prostitutes were self-employed, well-educated, drug-free like a law school classmate of mine and JNOV was, that’s one thing. But for every person like her, there’s 10,000 scared Ukrainian and Cambodian women coming in to this country.

Have you been to Houston? No zoning requirements there. And a titty bar every five feet, and billboards for them every 10 feet. I’m not a prude in the least, but it’s pretty tacky. And it’s pretty tacky when Japanese tourists and white boys from Fresno come in to my city to rape 16 year old girls from the middle provinces of China. And you see it every Friday evening if you walk to the corner of Kearney and Sacramento Streets.

Okay, I’m blathering now. My point has been lost. I think I’m going to go watch the Unicorn’s acceptance speech on You Tube.


@SanFranLefty: I have been to Houston and I don’t want to repeat the experience.

Everything you say makes sense, and as I said, I didn’t read the Prop K text so I don’t know how horrible it might be. I just think that generally prostitution should be legal. And like the socialist/libertarian I am, regulate and tax the fuck out of it but don’t go chasing whores down the street and slapping the cuffs on them. Or their Johns.

Also, I think all self-employed prostitutes should have universal health-care, just like the rest of us.

In most states of Australia prostitution is de-criminalised. And Sex workers work out of a house.

Street prostitution still exists, as there’s still a market for it, and the Stand Over tactics still exist for the street workers.

Fortunately sex workers are begining to organise and form collectives. They provide advice, a list of “aware” health providers and “creep sheets” (People to avoid being alone with) and providing advice about financial planning and negotiation skills.

Many houses are now “renting” the rooms to the sex-worker so the house can claim “sub-contractor” status for their workers and are not liable for OHS and Superannuation etc.

And me, I’m conflicted about availing myself of a prostitutes services. Yes, they need the income, but am I exploiting them, or are they taking advantage of me?

I knew one worker that was paying off her son’s funeral, others are working their way through University. Should I be ashamed of my needs and someone willing to negotiate to meet them? I don’t know, I’m not a woman.

Are they doing it against their will? Yes some are. And several people have been convicted for slavery and visa violations here in Australia for importing workers under false pretences, and making them work to buy back their passports.

But really, off the streets, into houses is best for the workers. Less dangerous, able to be monitored regarding condom use and pay and conditions.

I had a friend of mine who got fleas from the house she was working in. A quick call to the collective had the house shut down by the local council under health considerations. The workers moved on to other, better houses.

Really, it’s about people using other people, and avoiding tax.

@Promnight: Oh, Prommie, I love you, and we are fellow weirdos. I too grew up reading everything I could lay my hands on (but I received lots of encouragement to do so from my grandmother, who had the raising of me during the most critical years, i.e., before kindergarten, and was around for significant portions of the rest of my young life). My moment like your narwhal moment came in high school, when a boy in my class (named Lynn too) was sure he could stump me by asking me if I knew what a ziggurat was. But your narwhal story is truly wonderful, involving as it does an actual unicorn horn plus wildest PEI. I love your speculation about narwhal tusks giving rise to the unicorn legend.

@Promnight: Forgot to note that you of course wouldn’t have been stumped by ziggurats, either, things beginning with Z falling within your purview.

Just to make it clear, I’m writing about the porn industry’s reaction to the measure, not to how the measure would actually have been enacted. I make no claims to being an expert in California law – I’m only an expert in what goes on in the porn industry and what they are talking about.

My general feeling is that no matter what the specifics of the law, any amount of decriminalization would be a step in the right direction. Criminalization breeds criminals.

American history seems to show that there are four things that simply can not be effectively legislated:

1. Booze

2. Drugs

3. Gambling

4. Prostitution

Every effort to criminalize these four things has done nothing but enrich the criminal underclass, while causing harm to both the workers and consumers in the industry.

@Pedonator: @drinkyclown: I have terabytes of the stuff for the asking.

@rptrcub: @Pedonator: @drinkyclown: Chest hair is YAY! in my book. Prostitution I will leave to the experts, although this has been a very insightful read.

hear hear! the remnants of puritanical america–alive and well.
think of the tax dollars! you’re so right. there is no sane argument why these things are illegal, or ever were. reminds me of salem.

so gambling and booze grudgingly got legal when someone sharpened their pencil. and as a feminist, what business is it of mine if someone has their body to sell? and DON’T even get me started about illegal pot.
only the finest medicinal substance to be had. big tobacco is responsible for that one. and the cost of locking up potheads? pure insanity, pure profit for co-operative legislators.

me too. i like some fur on my man meat, just not on the back and shoulders…those babies get naired.

(think bart will tell us which calendars he’s gracing?)

@baked: That’s my actual name – and unless you are into beer bellies, I don’t think you’d want to see me grace a calendar

I get laid because I’m able to write and talk a good game, and because of the generosity and bad eyesight of Miss Expatria, not because of my looks.

Anyway, send over some questions so I have something to write next week!

how weird! it’s my porno name!
and isn’t it missRome now?

beer bellies are sexy, say like 3 month gestation big.
my rat has one.

@bart_calendar: Interesting. I thought that since nojo assisted in your debut you were perhaps the “silent creative partner” he mentions from time to time. Back to the drawing board on that one.

@mellbell: Actually, Silent Creative Partner is now talking and very, very visible.

@baked: You are right! On every other site my love goes under the name “Miss Expatria” but here she calls herself “Rome Girl.”

@bart_calendar: Mom googles her name, and she doesn’t want Mom seeing what a potty mouth she has here.

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment