Crumping You Can Believe In

Our Open Thread/Dance-Off for the Obamamercial kicks its heels at 7:45 p.m. Eastern. NBC, CBS and Fox are carrying it, as is MSNBC — which we think means West Coast cable potatoes will be able to catch the early feed. Or you can watch John McCain’s counterprogramming on ABC: “Pushing Daisies”.

Obama starring in infomercial, broader TV blitz [AP]
43 Comments

On top of the infomercial on pretty much every US American network, Black Eagle/Unicorn/Barry is going to make a visit to The Daily Show tonight.

@ManchuCandidate:
stinque telepathy! just logged in to say the same….

That One with my jon! TONIGHT!!

T/J
for those of you following the mini series ‘as the stomach churns’ update:
rat bastard is coming home in 2 1/2 weeks. said those 3 magic little words while on vacay with strange:

will you behave?
act somewhat normal?
i love you
want you back
girlfriend is history
see you soon
and forever more

my dad said there is no soap opera weirder than my actual life, so stay tuned for future chapters.
and THANKS for all the support, stinquers pulled me through!

@ManchuCandidate: Has the Commander in Chief of American Snarkitude had PG back on the show since he clinched the GOP nom? I remember he had repeated appearances earlier this year.

@baked: Honey, please consider castration.

@rptrcub:
My friend, no.

@baked:
Crazy, er, brilliant minds think alike.

As for RB. I think a wait and see posture is the best. Actions speak louder than words. Or so sez the clichematic…

@ManchuCandidate: I remember when JS had Kerry on in the run up to the 04 elections. Stewart let his guard down and appeared ready to wash Kerry’s feet he was so sympathetic. As big as a deal as it is to score Black Eagle, I hope that Jon keeps his edge; Barry is better when he’s faced with some Real.

@baked: I hope the words were “Your turn now”. Or maybe “Is that sharp?”

@rptrcub: If you mean since McCain smacked down Huckabee, then yeah, at least once (though I seem to remember a more recent appearance). Stewart keeps his politics surprisingly close, and he’s expressed a good deal of admiration for McCain in the past, but unless he endorses the old man between now and next Tuesday it’s hard to fathom that admiration translating into a vote.

@nabisco:
That didn’t work out so well.

@mellbell:
True, but I still remember the near fight JS and PG had when JS pressed him about the Mess O’potamia. PG was pretty close to calling JS the C-word.

@ManchuCandidate: No, I mean which c-word? The pinko c-word? The Cindy McCain c-word?

@mellbell:
The lady parts C-word. PG was all red and huffing while JS was kinda freaked out post interview.

@baked: You should pull the old Eddie Murphy line on him, from way back, where the wife says, “thats OK, honey, its alright. Now why don’t you just, go to sleep.”

@nabisco: @ManchuCandidate: @rptrcub:
now what good would castration do ME? cutting off my…er, nose to spite my …er, face? there are other methods…i’m crazy, not stupid!
besides, we have an agreement to not torture each other at all, will be a nice change of pace. actions will speak loudly. leash will be short. good behavior will be required as we prepare to move to another country..again…the 4th time in 10 years. we’re fucking barnum and baily.

mell, you think jon keeps his politics close? i think he made geezer look like a clown everytime he was on, and i remember that smackdown, when jon lost his cool. but other than that one time, as i’ve said before, PG is the bud melman of the show.

@Prommie:
or the dying man confessing his affairs to his wife with his dying breaths.
and the wife says, shhh, it’s ok honey, just relax and let the poisen take effect.

@baked: I mean that in the sense that his response to the Kerry softball interview was, essentially, “Well, I’m not Edward R. Murrow, and people shouldn’t expect that,” and that he didn’t say he’d be voting for Kerry, only that he’d rather be making fun of him than Bush come January 20. His humor is not as partisan as some people seem to think, and he does a fairly good job of keeping the professional and the personal separate.

@baked: He he.

Et Alia (where did she go, anyway?) Just for fun, off-topic, take a look at this right wing blog, especially the comments, the comments about rioting and civil war, really scary: http://www.red-alerts.com/homeland-security/obama-supporter-carves-b-into-20-year-old-womans-head-because-shes-a-mccain-supporter/

@redmanlaw: And jewelry, gold, platinum, and gemstones, in these uncertain times, converting your wealth to small, easily transportable commodities is just good common sense. He’ll thank you for your foresight and prudence in choosing this investment. Remember when Kobe Bryant invested $4million in that diamond ring?

@redmanlaw:
I think that the M-16 “hand bag” would help baked keep RB in line.

Ditch the fatigues though. They make everyone look dumpy unless you get them custom tailored like the Airborne, Marines and eelight unit guys get them.

@redmanlaw:
reds!
great site! i’ve been waiting to ask you what you think of the weapons these adorable israeli kids are toting? they are scary as shit! and these kids are so steely yet adorable.
i had dinner one night at the home of family friends with a 23 year old daughter. the most beautiful blue eyed blonde who was giggling like the kid she is. she’s a COMMANDER in the army. she’s training 40 girls right now how to shoot them there uzi’s. it’s wild.

@ManchuCandidate: Um, not entirely dumpy.

ADD: link fail. But there were a couple shots of them there IDF grrlz rockin the camo and cammie look.

@Prommie:
“convert to easily transportable commodities”
the jews have been doing just that for thousands of years. as they were kicked around. did i tell the tale of the emerald necklace from the holocaust museum? if i did ignore me i’m senile. if not….

there was a necklace on display of huge emeralds and diamonds. multi million dollar piece. never saw anything like it in the tower of london.
anyway, he hid it in the floor of his home before the nazi’s carted him and his wife away. he survived the camp, she did not. and though he was literally penniless and starving, would not sell the necklace to honor his wife’s memory. eventually made it’s way to the museum. made me cry. made RB yawn.

@nabisco:
ya know why this is the best looking army?
every single kid, no exceptions, none. every kid upon high school graduation goes into the army. every kid.
does a lot to improve the appearance of the troops. i’m telling you, these kids are cute cute hot!

TJ/ Geezer plays the palling around with Palestinian terrrists card. But oops, looks like Johnny hosted the guy as well.

Have they no shame? I saw Ari “like my lasik?” Fleisher on CNN last night, and he was pounding the “ain’t no friend of Israel” drum really hard. Are they back to trying to work Florida again?

@baked: No doubt. I’ve run into quite a few doing the backpack circuit shortly after their mandatory service, and was always impressed. Not to mention a little intimidated by the idea that the cute, curly headed woman I was chatting up could probably crush my windpipe if my lines weren’t played well!

@prommie, baked: As someone who spent the weekend humping around the mountains carrying a rifle and pack, I have to say that anyone who thinks they can just grab their shit and run should really try carrying more than 20 lbs around in a pack or duffle bag for a couple of days. I cut my load down to 12 lbs (in addition to 9 lb rifle) by stripping out the full-sized heavy duty tarp/space blanket, full first aid kit, extra compass and cut the fire making supplies in half, but I still had enough food and gear to stay out the night if I needed to. Add your gold coins or whatever to that. The fact that your pack gets lighter over the course of the day means you’re running out of water. Make sure you get good vibram*-soled boots with ankle support and good non-cotton socks for fleeing the hordes.

@ManchuCandidate: TR had his made for the Spanish-American War at Ambercrombie and Fitch, back in the day when they were safari outfitters and shit.

*Abraham’s backpacking hippie nephew.

New ASU poll has Obama down by only 2 points in Arizona! Can you feel the love?!!

@Jamie Sommers: You really should not be defending your home state the weekend before the election. Did you all see Rachel putting the race in terms of relative positions on a football field last night? Awesome.

@baked: That’s good news. I really hope it works out the way you want. But Prommie has a point I can’t believe I overlooked: RB owes you some really nice jewelry. Portable property is so important.

As I predicted, PsychoGeezer is giving speeches that he would never delay the World Series for his ego. Never mind the fact that Fox approached the Obama campaign offering to delay the game so they could have him on. Never mind the fact that the first game of the NFL season was started late so that PG could give his acceptance speech at the convention.

Meanwhile, who are the people who are still undecided? As David Sedaris recently wrote:

I look at these people and can’t quite believe that they exist. Are they professional actors? I wonder. Or are they simply laymen who want a lot of attention?

To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”

reds,
i just took the time to look at all the pics on rachel papo’s site you posted. what great pics. and she didn’t have to target just the pretty ones, i’m telling ya, they all look like that! oh, straight boys…..
you may want to go through these pics, srsly! ROCKIN the cammo!

@redmanlaw: That’s our lesbian! Gotta love the girls.

@Mistress Cynica:
and our wedding anniversary is 3 days after he gets here. i already gave him the heads up on it……..

@SanFranLefty:
david sedaris is my favorite writer on the planet.

@redmanlaw: New shoes? Fuck, I’m gonna need new pants! (One thing Seattle doesn’t have: much of a Jewish population. I’ve clearly been missing out.)

@IanJ, nojo, alla you Stinquers: Looks like “Girls of the IDF” would have worked for Friday night . . .

@redmanlaw:
in her first appearence in the clip, did you notice palin CHEWING GUM while babbling at her own rally???

Palin went to a factory, a start up, great story, actually, that produces solar electric panels, and there she started chanting “drill baby drill.”

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27436937

Sometimes I do despair. Really do. What the fuck is the use of being smart? I would have been better off Candide’s neighbor. I want to be stupid. A happy idiot. This so sucks. Really really sucks.

@redmanlaw:
Agreed with the pack. Last year I traveled light. No problems with the hills over three days.

This year I packed 15 pounds heavier to help spread the load because someone carried way too much. Nearly broke my ankle on the 2nd day and packed it in.

@SanFranLefty: What’s so great is I can just hear Sedaris saying that. I really wanted to go hear him in Portland on Halloween, but tickets started at $95.

@redmanlaw: OMFG. An elaborate football metaphor! It’s like she’s in my brain. Who knew the man of my dreams would turn out to be a woman.

@Prommie: Werd. I’ve been slacking off at work lately because I’ve given up on intelligence as an asset. Why bother? I should be spending more time showcasing my tits apparently.

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