Snaps, Girlfriend

Item: Charlie Crist extends early voting hours, so that polls will be open 12 hours per day for the duration, as opposed to 8.  (Weekend counts as one day apparently, so 12 hours total over two days.)

The wingers are having a field day with this, of course (e.g. Crist = ACORN = Commie). My personal favorite is short and to the point:

Early voting is bad and by Crist doing this he just gave the election to Obama. I am shocked and disgusted.

(Possibility of this actually coming from a Democrat… acknowledged. Sockpuppetry is all the rage you know. But it probably did come from a Republican, an unidentified source tells me. Thus: true. Wingnuts are so adorable when they’re crazy.)

Note: we do not discount the whole black box thing where the black box thing was born. Yet, props where props be due, until proven otherwise.


Hey, isn’t he engaged? How’s that wedding coming along, then?

From my travels in wingnuttia I can tell you – generally if the comment is free of spelling, grammar, and syntax errors, it’s a sock puppet. Sprezzatura!

he just gave the election to Obama

Please tell me there’s a Brand Name behind that one. Because I thought, well, the voters had something to do with elections. I know, I know.

Seriously, though, that’s a pretty “Fuck You” move. We all know that when more people vote, Democrats tend to get elected. McCain must have really pissed Chuckie-darling off…

Maybe this whole democracy thing just isn’t for wingnuts, but then again neither is logic or reality.

Actually, the only all-caps screed I caught was a Dem-leaning one. And, I must confess I expected at least one swipe at Charlie’s *cough cough* “manliness”. Well done, Fla-ridians.

@Tommmcatt Yet Again:
Charlie Crist was probably very sore when “Starkist” McCain told him “Sorry Charlie, we’re going with Alaskan Queen Crab.”

@ManchuCandidate: Great. Now, I’m craving seafood. You happy?

/TJ Extraordinarily Lifelike Anamatronic Nancy Pelosi Rocks the You Tube !!!!

If you listen close you can hear “It’s a Small World” playing softly in the background….

@Jamie Sommers:
Yes. Misery loves company. I haven’t eaten since noon and I’m still working. Currently 8pm.


Maybe this whole democracy thing just isn’t for wingnuts, but then again neither is logic or reality.

I know! Remember how they’ve been screeching about democracy promotion for all, and then the ingrateful piss-ons of the world go and elect Hamas or Hezbollah.

Now our nation is poised to elect a socialist Mooslem! We won’t be hearing the D-word from the wingtards for a looooong time.

@Tommmcatt Yet Again: Well, really. After he got “engaged” and everything, he gets passed over for Caribou Barbie? Always a bridesmaid…

I’m too tired to figure out if there is something sinister behind this. Maybe tomorrow.

Argh! My hotel room doesn’t have MSNBC or Comedy Central! How am I going to survive without my boyfriends Keiff Oh and Jon and girlfriend Rachel?

Is there wifi, or are you in hell? You can download full episodes of Rachel on itunes on from MSNBC and watch Jon & Stephen online. Not sure about Keef.

All I am seeing is Republicans flailing in desperation, everywhere. TPM has a youtube of the wingnuts outside a Palin Rally today on PA, ohmygod, one of them actually says, if he gets elected, he will be bombed, blown up, killed, then makes a gun with his hand, and points it, and goes “pow.” He said he is hearing this from all his friends. Palin sure connects with people, a natural politician, in the Hitler vein, she connects with racist fascists. Meanwhile McCain campiagn staff are being qouted all over the place saying Palin is a “whacko,” completely ignorant of domestic and foreign policy, and so on, and worse. Major conservative pundits are trying to salvage their reputations by jumping ship, pushing aside women and children to be first in the lifeboats, where they are apparently finding McCain campaign staff already hiding under the canvas.

Wingnuts heads are exploding everwhere.

The only thing that has not happened so far is a big October Surprise, but at this point, as I said before, the economic implosion seems to have tied the neocons hands as far as starting any wars, Cheney has even disappeared, probably to some game farm where they have an IV in one arm, heart monitors in place, and a sedated involuntary organ donor on standby, while game farm employees come and go in a constant stream bringing in small animals and birds for him to strangle with his hands, just to keep his bloodlust sated to some extent as he constantly screams for them to bring in his shotgun and some lawyers to shoot in the face.

McCain has turned into a cancerous zombie like creature, sad, almost.

Oh, but its still not time for looking forward to the victory party, my friends. I will not believe until after the inauguration. They are evil, desperate, vicious, and armed.

@Promnight: As I checked back to my gmail after reading your very crumulent comment, I noticed that the little ad line thingy at the top of the e-mail list was for the Hitler Youth Komsomol College Republicans — “College Republicans – – Fighting to win the youth vote and elect Republicans. Learn more!”

They have a very low goal for this program of theirs — $25 K. And they’ve only made it to 21. And they have some seriously deluded twitterers (should I just call them twits?) listed there:

RobMartin: thinks we might pull this one off! #litf08

nheater: Lady- My son has 2 masters degrees and is voting for Obama. Me- What a shame! Lady- My money for his schooling was a WASTE. #litf08

(No, actually, it did the nation some good.)

If they all don’t commit some kind of Jonestown Massacre, they’ll probably be drowning their sorrows with some hot illicit gay Blowvember action.

And what’s even better is that Crist’s actions are officially a fucking state of emergency. As in a disaster declaration after a hurricane.

@Promnight: Iwillnothaveapanicattack. Iwillnothaveapanicattack. Iwillnothaveapanicattack. Seriously.

Jr and I just discussed our strategy for dealing with potential dumb fuckery at the polls. The only bill I have with both of our names on it is our car insurance policy — bringing that. If someone throws around the N word, we’re ignoring that. We’re getting to the polls when they open, and we’re taking our time in the booth. My aunt told me not to use the shortcut button to vote for the D slate — instead we’re casting our votes individually. I don’t know that it matters, and I could be falling for some sort of election magical thinking, but I’ll do anything to ensure my vote counts. All I have left to do is to program the OUR VOTE and ACLU numbers in my phone. I might also write them on my palm or have them tattooed somewhere.

Anyone out there feel like keeping me company until my meds kick in? I thought the NOVA show about fractals might make me sleepy, but I’m getting annoyed. I will marry the man who can explain String Theory to me. If I don’t get fractals down, I’m going to be pissed. Engineers, mathematicians, chemists and physicists of the world, I adore you.

@JNOV: Huzzah! Fractals make sense. String Theory? Not so much.

@JNOV: Mr Cyn loves all that physics, stuff. I don’t understand it and find myself perfectly able to live with the mystery of it all. It’s like magic!

Although we vote by mail here, I hand-delivered our ballots to the County Clerk’s office today because I was afraid to trust the mail. This will be the first time the vote I’ve cast for president actually has a chance of counting for something in the state where I live.

Do you guys not have early voting? Do it if you can and don’t wait until election day.
In Pennsylvania you don’t need ID to vote unless it’s your first time. However, in an abundance of caution bring your DL, Social Security card, and/or that bill. DO NOT let them force you to use a provisional ballot. If they say you can only use a provisional ballot, step outside and call Election Protection immediately.
There’s a 100 foot requirement for politiking outside the polling place. There may be observers inside the area where you are voting and if they are of the Republican persuasion, they may try to look all tough. They cannot talk to you, so don’t worry about that. The last time I did legal observing the GOP sent burly white men in suits with crew cuts staring at the Puerto Rican and Dominican immigrants lining up to vote. I stood right next to them with my “Usted tiene el derecho del voto” t-shirt on and smiled at the immigrants.
Do not vote straight ticket on the Pennsylvania computers. Your state has the first generation of computer machines and they’re kind of hoopty. I did poll watching in Philly in ’04, so I’m familiar with Penn. machines and laws, for more info, click here.

@Mistress Cynica: I’m very stubborn when it comes to learning things — I refuse to admit that I can’t learn something. I might not be able to create an equation or a theory, but I want to believe I can understand them. The onus is on the teacher to explain whatever it is in terms that I can understand, because I refuse to believe that my brain is limited. But it is, and I am. I managed to get an A in calculus, but chemistry kicked my ass. I was doing fine until I had to memorize the salts, and my brain gave out. Flash cards didn’t even help.

Brian Greene had a NOVA special on String Theory (he’s amazingly hot), and no matter how many times I watched it, I just didn’t get it. I’m going to try reading his book. I will understand it, dammit.

@SanFranLefty: Thanks for the information and the link. No, we don’t have early voting here, and tomorrow I’m going to call to see if we’re still registered or if we were purged. We were getting campaign mail until a couple of weeks ago, so we’re probably fine. I’m just nervous.

@Mistress Cynica: I have verrrry slooooow wifi at this hotel, but I have an 8 year old laptop (obviously a Mac because no PC laptop would last that long). It’s the FrankenMac with additional memory and other things added on over the years, but it cannot handle videos on You Tube or livestreaming shows.

Actually, if you want quicker service, call Election Protection and they somehow can check if you’re registered. Nojo has the number at the top of the page.

At least my hotel has the Deportes Mundial de Fox channel and so I get to watch clips of the Mexico -Brazil soccer game, narrated in hyperventilating Spanish. Right now they’re showing something like SportsCenter where they’re all arguing over whether a player was offsides on a critical play.

Chicago Bureau – thank you for not posting a picture of Crist. I am frightened by his orange leather skin.

For all those that would like to avoid a panic attack and glow is some warm fuzziness however briefly, watch Michelle Obama on The Tonight Show. So refreshing in this time of negative bullshit from McCain/Palin.

Link is here

Michelle Eagle is prettier in person, says Mrs RML, who saw her today in Las Vegas NM. She got me a “New Mexico Indians” for Obama poster and a “Native Americans for Obama” shirt from some skins* making a few bucks off the phenom. I’ll post images in a bit.

/back to sewing moccasins for son of rml

*bros, short for “redskins”

For reasons already explained above I can’t watch the videos on my ancient hoopty-ass FrankenMac, but here’s another thing on how fabulous Michelle is.

I don’t want to jinx this and refer to her as our next First Lady.

P.S. @Dodger – are your Lakers about to blow their lead over the Trailblazers?

The lack of early voting in PA explains why McCain is putting all of his chips on your state. Message to you, Nabisco, and any other Pennsylvania area Cynical Stinquer – get to the polls at the ass crack of dawn in anticipation of the line. Sweet old people live next door? Help them find a utility bill or driver’s license, give them a ride, fill up the thermos with hot tea, and throw a few lawn chairs in the trunk and sit with them in line for a few hours. I wish I could come to PA and help drive people around – if JNOV Jr. reports for duty in downtown Philly to the Unicorn offices, that’s what they’ll ask him to do – it’s worth that tank of gas.

And Prommie and Mrs. Prommie and any other Jersey stinque-heads – please consider taking the day off on Tuesday and driving people to the polls in Philly, or doing poll watching.

Seriously, y’all, I am totally freaking out. We CANNOT get complacent or cocky. I worship Nate at but I still can’t believe his numbers.

@SanFranLefty: Right on, sister. In Georgia, the GOP SOS is refusing to extend advance voting to this weekend or Monday, at the request of our Ga. Dem party chair, saying there’s nothing in state law that allows her to do it. Wait times for early voting are getting to be 6-8 hours, which is worrying — but it seems that some people really don’t mind, which gives me Teh Hope (TM).

The end story is that Georgia, like other states, was totally unprepared, especially in our heathen liberal urban counties like Fulton and DeKalb (which dickface Sen. Saxby Chambliss, R, called “not the real Georgia” on public radio earlier this week). Whether this was intentional or not remains to be seen, but seeing as some consider us a tossup now, it’s disturbing.

@JNOV: Greene’s book is very good. Stay with it. A couple of things he doesn’t get to: why is there matter/energy, rather than not? why does mathematics actually describe the world?

@SanFranLefty: Missed the game, Mrs. DB and I were watching “The Last Enemy” on Mystery. It’s very well done.

Exactly. Until the last vote is flipped, um, counted in Feb 2009.

@SanFranLefty: I’ll be going to the polls first thing. During the primaries, I cautioned the missus that the lines would be gawdawful, but they really weren’t. I suspect they will be this time around. I already have some chairs and blankets in my trunk along with the kids’ sports equipment, so I’m a tailgatin’ entertainment Daddy ready to keep the kids active and the parents hopey and happy.

The courts here are about to rule on what kind of campaign attire you are allowed to sport inside the polling station. It is entirely possible that they’ll allow an Obama/Biden shirt or pin as long as the wearer is not actively courting votes. That could create all kinds of havoc, given the overwhelming number of yahoos out there these days.

I haven’t heard back from Anonymous Foreign Observer since she left for Philly end of last week. She had a trip to West Virginia on her dance card, although officials there made it abundantly clear they wanted nothing to do with ferriners.

@JNOV: Just substitute the equations describing a vibrating string with appropriate length and frequency in your field equations describing the subatomic particles, JNOV, sheese, whats so hard about that? That then allows you to come tantalizingly close to unifying the electromagnetic force, the weak force, and gravity, but only if you assume a 10-dimensional universe. He ha, just kidding. I am clueless.

@Dodgerblue: Mathematics cannot even describe Pi.

TJ/Stuffing the Bribe in the Bra – Mass Dem Kicks it Old School. Now that’s the Democratic Party I know and love.

@nabisco: I did my civic duty this morning on the penultimate day of early voting here. I got to the local library at 10 to 9 and the line was about 10-deep. By the time they opened 10 minutes later, it was about 30-deep and counting. But I was in and out in less than half an hour. Not bad at all!

Also, I want everyone to know I went in to edit and took out second-to-last in favor of penultimate above. I never pass up a chance to use the word penultimate!

@JNOV: @Dodgerblue: OK, I’m such a moron my first thought was: “Brian Greene? From 90210? Who knew he was such a brainiac.”

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