Halloween Customer Survey
How satisfied were you with your candy?
Satisfied
Not satisfied
Dude, you gave me a rock
If Not Satisfied, which candy did you receive?
Fucking KitKat again
Bit-O-Honey? Really?
Chick Tract
If Chick Tract, what was the problem with it?
Foxhole conversion not believable
Lake of Fire insufficiently pants-wetting
Illustrated depiction of Paul’s Second Epistle to the Thessalonians not engaging
What is your likely response to your dissatisfaction?
Toilet paper
Flaming sack of shit
Sex-offender registry
What the hell are you, anyway?
Pirate
Fairy
Inchoate despair at the dystopian future you’re leaving me as a grownup, you damn Boomer
How old are you?
Seven
Nine
What’s your deal, man, I’m tall for my age
How likely are you to return next year?
Not likely
Very likely
My parents blame you for the edible
Thank you for your responses. While we strive to satisfy all ghosts, goblins, witches, and god knows what that is, if we’re gonna be stuck with a bowl of leftovers, they’re gonna be KitKats.
Hey! I enjoy Kitkats. Your American ones suck. Like your “Cadbury” products made by Hershey.
My former housemate used to piss me off because when he handed out candy because he would only hand out the ones he hated and keep the ones he wanted to eat.
I didn’t buy the candy for him to stuff his maw with. I ended that quickly.
@ManchuCandidate: Inside joke: I buy Halloween candy defensively, so if I’m gonna be stuck with them, they’re gonna be KitKats.
And, since I struck out tonight, I have a full bag of them.
Election disaster (?)
The real story nationwide is the shockingly poor voter turnout even for an off-year election, especially in highly educated, vote-by-mail, true blue cities like Seattle/King County at 22%. It’s a “our system of government has lost all legitimacy” result one would expect in a former Soviet republic, not the US.
This isn’t just another “dumbass Millennials and Gen Zers can’t stop TikToking long enough to vote” problem, this is a catastrophic democratic failure that enabled a racist backlash guaranteed to doom us if repeated in 2022 and 2024.
Countless people have simply given up, and you don’t need a PhD in history to know what happens when democratic societies collapse. Wish there were more good news today.
Wow, Aaron Rodgers really hit the toxic masculinity trifecta of narcissism, selfishness, and entitlement. He’s even managed to further demoralize Jeopardy fans. Whattan asshole.
OMG Infrastructure Week is here for real!
@¡Andrew!:
That’s a lot of Sprots Star.
All Star/HoF of Assholes
@ManchuCandidate:
/seen online/
Kaaron Rodgers, ha ha ha
Kaaron’s gonna call your manager!
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Sen. sENEMA has a career ahead of her in giving designer psychedelic enemas to trust-fund…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: She thought three's company. Nope.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Gawd hates SIN, specifically Kyrsten SINema.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! So long, Senatard Glitter-trash. I hope she knows how much everyone H8s her :0)
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! The racist kleptocratic MSM is really gonna have to crank up the bread and circuses now that their…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Ted Kazinski Sec of Interior Only the DEAD are extreme enough to serve in DONNIE…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Department of Health & Human Services: Charles Manson Defense Secretary:…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Right, the administration's all star line up: Pres: Trump VP: Ted Kaczynski…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Actually, FDLE would be the first to admit it. The state banks on it with 'sue me…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! I cannot wait for the Republinazi MAGAt trash to DEMAND that $hitler be allowed to be president…