Block the Vote
Here’s how elections work: Votes are cast, ballots counted, winners declared, the Republic endures.
Oops, we’re sorry. That’s the Schoolhouse Rock version.
That elections — our elections — don’t work like a simple cartoon, or a Capra movie, or a high-school civics class, well, that’s a problem, isn’t it?
Challenges to our most sacred rights as citizens aren’t new, by any means. Denying the vote is in our founding document. Women’s suffrage is only — just now — a century old. Voter registration itself was conceived as an exclusionary tactic, and Florida has just revived poll taxes under the guise of making felons pay up first.
Florida citizens didn’t vote for that.
And of course there’s also gerrymandering, and voter ID, and strategic limiting of polling locations, and everything else we were already looking forward to six months ago, in the Before Times.
It’s a perverse testament to how fundamentally powerful voting is, that folks will do everything in their power to prevent it. What should be Schoolhouse Rock plays out like Mad Max.
We should recognize this, see it for what it is. There’s politics, and there are sustained assaults against the fundamental rights of citizens. We should appreciate the difference.
“More voters than ever will vote by mail in November,” reads the Politico reporter’s tweet, “and Democrats are waging a two-front war: In court cases across the country, and in a rapidly-changing voter contact program. A close election could hinge on its success.”
A “close election”. Y’know, that’s not what we’re talking about. We’re not talking about a nailbiter 50-50 vote split, the result unknown until the final ballots are counted in the wee hours of the morning, or, as is more customary these days, the weeks ahead. Donald Trump is not going to win. He didn’t win the last time. He’s likely to lose by significantly more than 2.9 million votes this time.
That is, if every citizen votes who wants to. And all our ballots are counted.
That’s why Trump’s minions are monkeywrenching the mail, of course. Especially in Democratic areas. He can’t win outright, so he seeks to sow confusion, cast doubt upon the legitimacy of the process.
This isn’t politics. This is a slow-motion coup, carried out in plain sight. This is an attack on the Homeland.
And the thing is, he just might pull it off.
The Politico story itself does a fair job outlining what the Democratic Party is doing to forestall that outcome, getting out the vote in sufficient numbers despite the obstacles — the deliberate obstacles — to create a margin of victory beyond doubt.
“The best strategy to prevent Trump from casting unwarranted shade on the results of the election is to win in a landslide,” says the Wisconsin party chief.
Which is a polite way to put it.
Which also illustrates the problem.
Shit ain’t being seen for what it is.
It won’t just be Trump casting shade. It will also be Fox News. It will also be craven Republican officials, the traitors who looked the other way the last time our elections were assaulted, and who benefited from the assault.
And then Establishment Journalism will both-sides the hell out of it. Set Fox aside: We’re looking at weeks — months! — of CNN, the Times, WaPo, all of them, buying into it, broadcasting the engineered illegitimacy to the nation as yet another political issue, perhaps a Constitutional Crisis, but not what it is.
Until the stacked Supreme Court weighs in, of course. Again.
All because we lack the clarity of Schoolhouse Rock: That votes should be cast and counted, and anything that gets in the way ain’t democracy, but tyranny.
Do you guys need UN poll watchers?
The GOPers are prepping morons and thugs to “watch” polls… more to intimidate the fuck out of people they don’t like which isn’t anyone not white or wearing a MAGAt hat.
@ManchuCandidate: In the works.
@ManchuCandidate: I was watching The National, and they had Chantal Hébert on At Issue, and she was Zooming in a t-shirt, like from the Gap.
A T-SHIRT!!!
Chantal is outta fux to give, y’all.
/sinners/
When Jerry Farthell’s cover story came out about his wife’s “Fatal Attraction” affair with the pool boy, we knew the truth would be juicier than a summer peach :-)
On to Act II, in which Farthell tearfully admits to getting railed harder than his wife, and loving every second of getting his prostate pounded by Satan’s ramrod poker.
Followed by Act III, in which Farthell proclaims the Lawd Gawd has forgiven him for his filthy, nasty, sinful addiction to THICK COCKS (and meth), and that the truly faithful will send Liberty U every last dollar–and not a penny less–otherwise they’ll burn in a lake of hellfire with their agonized screams delighting the Baybee Jayzus.
Getchur checkbooks open, ladies!
(and SCENE! barrrrrfffff!)
@ManchuCandidate: Condolences on Canuckistani CONs choosing beady-eyed Airhead the’Toole as party leader, jeezus.
I’d prayed to the FSM that they’d choose Peter MacKay, the only sort of sane candidate, but no dice.
Wrong-wing brainz don’t werk guud.
/death cult/
RNC Features Tribute From Family Members Of Americans Who Will Die If Trump Wins Second Term
“Above all else, we wanted to use the convention to honor these brave citizens and all that they will suffer if we succeed in getting President Trump back into office,” said RNC chairwoman Ronna McDaniel.
At press time, the RNC was airing a short sentimental tribute set to “(I’ve Had) The Time Of My Life” dedicated to all 1,500,000 future victims of the pandemic after a 2020 Trump victory.
https://politics.theonion.com/rnc-features-tribute-from-family-members-of-americans-w-1844829321
Donald Trump and America’s sad, failed model of masculinity
“The pathetic attempt to project a Herculean image by forgoing medical care has reached its apotheosis in the anti-mask crusade. There is a tragicomic disconnect between the way these men believe they look, and the way that reasonable people perceive them. As they struggle to show strength, they expose their weakness and insecurity.
Given that the “tough people,” including Trump himself, appear as frightened as kittens in a thunderstorm at the mere thought of women holding power, black families moving into suburban neighborhoods or Mexicans crossing the southern border, their posturing and preening, unlike their pandemic behavior, is the ultimate mask. The motorcycles, the guns and the eagerness to violate “political correctness” fail to conceal their obvious insecurity and frailty.
Donald Trump is the ultimate symbol of the sad (pathetic, failed) state of American manhood.”
And to think that if Prezinazi AntiChrist hadn’t cheated on his first wife,
then abandoned her and their three kids for his mistress/second wife,
then sloughed that gal and their child off for a few of Jeffrey Epstein’s victims,
followed by settling for a mail-order, gold-digging Slovenian hooker,
then the RepubliKKKans wouldn’t have their very own Jackie O(rgasm)
addressing their CONvention tonight.
Of course the best parts will be $6.99 on her OnlyFans account.
If the RNC wants theatre they need to get fucking serious!
MICHELLE! OBAMA! appears in chaps and a Putin mask wearing a flame-throwing barbed wire strap on dildo shrieking SEIG! HEIL! which inspires TRUMP! to drop trowsers and throw himself on his knees, ass in air shrieking, MAKE! ME! YOUR! BITCH!, VLADICAKES! and whimpering pathetically as he shakes his ass!
MICHELLE! laughs diabolically, strokes the death dildo and approaches the pathetic prostrate TRUMP! as the pit band lights into a zesty rendition of the broadway hit ‘Promises Promises’. . .
Then. . .
@FlyingChainSaw: Sure beats going through airport security…
Is it like that now? Gave up airplanes in March.
Is SEIG! HEIL! theatre of the air playing on TV tonight?
@FlyingChainSaw: Same here. I can’t imagine the circumstances under which I’d go anywhere near an airport, let alone set foot on a plane; sweet FSM, I miss traveling and exploring. Something I used to enjoy two or three times a year.
“Jayzus died because he was weak and stupid, Dotard Judas Tr666p is my Messiah now, losers!”
—VP Mike Dense, probably
Fucking LOSER! JAYSUS! should have torn himself from the cross, ripped off Pontius Pilate’s arm, shown him the wet end and beaten him to death with it like a NORMAL! GOD!
@FlyingChainSaw: Just seeing/reading anything about anyone in the nauseating Tr666p regime makes me physically ill.
Hmm, let’s see:
—Yet another American city in total chaos after yet another brutal extrajudicial racist execution perpetrated by the police;
—Total economic collapse, with tens of millions out of work and entire industries decimated, perversely making our cruel, depraved rulers rich beyond comprehension;
—California in flames, with entire planet to follow;
—180,000 dead in an out-of-control pandemic, and COVID cases surging in children;
—Hurricane Laura to obliterate a swath of the Gulf Coast;
—Relentlessly sleazy, coked-out Tr666publican Nastynal CONvention;
—Jerry Falwell Jr.’s multimillion-dollar cuck habit;
~42% of mindless American Idiots demanding another four (or more!!!) years of this cruelty, kleptocracy, insanity, stupidity, and grotesque incompetence.
—We live in a sick, nihilistic society that embraces sociopathic sadism and mass death.
That’s all one helluva split screen!!!
Gosh, imagine how bad these apocalypses would be if the Republinazis weren’t in charge.
“I alone can save you from the apocalyptic chaos and nightmarish national collapse that I myself have caused–Tr666p today, Tr666p tomorrow, TR666P FOREVER!
Now drink the Kool-Aid MAGAts!!!”
–Prezinazi AntiChrist, August 2020
Great Moments in American History
The RNC needs a human sacrifice sequence.
@FlyingChainSaw:
Something like 3,500 people died of C19 during the RNC. Just give them a bit, and I’m sure they’ll figure out how to blame the victims.
@¡Andrew!:
I know. O’Toole is now trying to act like he’s not a Jeebus Fetishist
GOPers are okay with letting people die.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Sen. sENEMA has a career ahead of her in giving designer psychedelic enemas to trust-fund…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: She thought three's company. Nope.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Gawd hates SIN, specifically Kyrsten SINema.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! So long, Senatard Glitter-trash. I hope she knows how much everyone H8s her :0)
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! The racist kleptocratic MSM is really gonna have to crank up the bread and circuses now that their…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Ted Kazinski Sec of Interior Only the DEAD are extreme enough to serve in DONNIE…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Department of Health & Human Services: Charles Manson Defense Secretary:…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Right, the administration's all star line up: Pres: Trump VP: Ted Kaczynski…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Actually, FDLE would be the first to admit it. The state banks on it with 'sue me…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! I cannot wait for the Republinazi MAGAt trash to DEMAND that $hitler be allowed to be president…