The Stinque Braquet 2019

It’s that time of year again, and— wait, what year is this? Really? Is he still President?


Well, since we seem to be stuck in this Timeline for the duration, why not enjoy some Bread & Circuses & Hoops & Armageddon &—

Are you sure he’s still President?


Nancy’s not gonna help us out of this one, and Beto’s busy prancing on every tabletop in the room, so we might as well endure the Stinque Braquet, hosted as ever by Braquet Dowager Mellbell.

Because there remains some accountability left in this world, we will again Name & Shame the Daily Losers, and you will enjoy it, because it’s either that or submitting you for the Democratic nomination.


Time flies. Got in under the wire getting my bracket posted.

Seems like only yesterday that I was on this site predicting Mike Pence would be President and here we are only a few short weeks from him taking the reins.

Also I don’t like my moniker anymore.

@libertarian tool: I think you can change it, although I haven’t looked at user-side settings in, uh, years.

Also: PARTY BRACKET, y’all!

And we’re off…

9 Players:

4 Dukes
2 Zags
1 Iowa
1 North Carolina
1 Michigan State (me)

As always, my only goal is to beat SFLefty

Note to self: Losers before bedtime.

Fucking Louisville and St. Mary’s!

My upsets are upsetting me. C’mon NKU and UC Irvine!

With Iowa win, Big 10 is 6-0 in the first round.

Out of 18 games so far, only four upsets (historically, 9-seeds beat 8-seeds half the time, so those don’t count for anything). Of those, three were 10-seeds beating 7-seeds, which you’d expect about 40% of the time anyway. So that leaves one true upset. How terribly boring.

UC Irvine’s got it tied at the half. Huzzah!

We interrupt this tournament to bring you a Public Service Announcement: It’s Mueller Time.

@mellbell: And in other news… I finally nailed an upset. Thank You Ducks.

@Discordian: Better you thank the Ducks than me. I suffer enough with my FB Eugene homies.

PARTY BRACKET FTW. Or second place.

@Discordian: Go Anteaters! I selected UC Irvine to win an upset in my Stinque or Swim bracket based solely upon their mascot. I’m in another larger pool where I have my “mascot bracket” and I have to say I’m doing pretty well so far in it.

Yes I did miss 14 of the 32 games and have fallen into the Stinque or Swim Basement of Shame. I even fell below HF’s Sweaty Jocks which I don’t think anyone can ever recover from emotionally.

I still have a Sweet 14, and my Elite 8 is intact, but the shame is too much. After this crushing humiliation I am embittered and embracing nihilism for the balance of the tournament. All Number 1 Seeds Must Fail.

We Interrupt Your “AG Barr Summary Conclusion of the Mueller Report” watch with this important BREAKING TOURNAMENT NEWS: We have our first National Champion Bracket Casualty as the Iowa Hawkeyes went down in flames taking @Nojo‘s Bracket with them.

You may now resume your previous political activity.

@Discordian: Slow-motion bust. I’m doomed in terms of possible total points, yet I remain near the top, like Wile E. Coyote not looking down yet.

@nojo: I’ve been thinking about this… You need to add more categories to your Loser Of The Day award. First to Bust their National Champion Selection is worthy of note and should take the LOTD honors for that day. A Special Mention at least.

@Discordian: Focus, man, focus! It’s all about branding.

The one exception is that nobody loses twice in a row, or else I’d be stuck with Cellar Dwellers for the duration.

Before the game tonight dashes my hopes, I’d just like to point out that my MSU pick is the only National Champion left standing in the Stinquey Bracket Final Four and I am on the cusp of achieving a lifetime goal of defeating @SanFranLefty. I expect to retire from bracketology after this triumph, as I have nothing more to achieve. That is all.

EDIT: Nevermind. The struggle is real.

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