Eric Cantor (2001-2015)

He lost his primary to a Teabagger. Ha. Ha. Ha.

douchetastic

 

37 Comments

YYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!

One of the meanest, dumbest, most openly corrupt and destructive sons of bitches to ever set foot in the Capitol. And that’s sayin’ somethin’!

@¡Andrew!: I’m enjoying the chatter that the teabaggers did him in, amidst other chatter that Demrats punked the open primary.

In other words: I hope Repugs learn the wrong lesson and keep keeling right.

@nojo: I hate to say that I’d enjoy watching him cry on teevee. That would make me a bad, bad person. Snakes can’t cry, so it’s a moot point tho.

@nojo: I don’t see the Dems as being that organized.

@Dodgerblue: Let’s run it this way: The first thing to explain is the substantial turnout increase from previous primaries. But since nobody saw this coming, there probably isn’t any exit polling.

Weigel’s take is that after leading what was effectively a teabagger/Chamber of Commerce coalition, Cantor didn’t notice that the teabaggers split off from the Chamber — the Chamber wanted immigration reform, the teabaggers didn’t. In the end, Cantor was hoist on his own petard.

Let me restate his thesis: After cynically goading the teabaggers on, the Chamber has discovered they really believe that shit. Send in the guillotines.

@nojo: I think this is good for us. No more Repub presidents.

@Dodgerblue: Yup. The flip side of gerrymandering is that moderate-sounding Republicans are toast, leaving the True Idiots to get all the attention. Bubba always had Newt to thank for looking good by comparison.

When you use bigots and the rich to win elections (see Southern Strategy) you should not be surprised when the worst elements take over.

@blogenfreude: I really don’t get the whole angry white male thing. As a cohort, what do US white men have to be angry about? The fact that Fox News is so popular shows that I really don’t get it.

@Dodgerblue: They are dying and they are not rich which proves they were right all along about everything. Otherwise they would be rich and they would never die.

Rogers and Hammerstein expressed it thusly:

How do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

@Benedick: This is so insanely geeky, but I was watching an episode of The Sarah Jane Adventures on Hulu, which is a Doctor Who spin-off featuring teens having sci-fi adventures, and one of the mysteries took place in a convent. Turns out–spoiler alert–all of the nuns were in on it and when they inevitably were discovered, the Mother Superior took one of the teen girls prisoner and told her to behave or “she’d find out just how they solve a problem like Maria.” I’ll bet that writer had waited his whole life to throw in that line. I almost fell off the sofa!

The FSM giveth, and the FSM taketh away.

Rik Mayall Has Died

In 1998, Rik Mayall was seriously injured while riding an ATV (the trampoline of motorized vehicles) and he spent 5 days on life support. Doctors were about to pull the plug on Mayall, but he started showing signs of life, so they kept him alive and he joked:

“I beat Jesus Christ. He was dead for three days at Easter. When I crashed it was the day before Good Friday, Crap Thursday, and I was technically dead until Easter Monday – that’s five days. Jesus was nailed up on Friday and came to on Easter Day. I beat him 5-3.”

@¡Andrew!: I only got around to watching Young Ones in recent months. The part I liked was the excuse for the musical acts: That made them a “variety” show to the Beeb, giving them a larger budget than a “comedy”.

@nojo: Rik was always my Young Ones fave, if only because I’ve always enjoyed adding “…like the fascist you are!” to the end of every sentence.

@Dodgerblue: I’m still cackling. Unicorn will take it in the nuts in the ’14 mid-terms, but this will be the best thing ever for a Dem House and Senate and President Warren/Hillbot/Castro administration.

/unless the “voting fraud” disenfranchisement continues, in which case I will call upon your recently-honed gun-shooting prowess to lead the revolution

@SanFranLefty: Bearing in mind that the House will be wingnut-gerrymandered through 2020, and—

Hold on. Who hit Comment #150000?

Hey, speaking of idiotic Republicans . . .

Some Republican douchecanoe changed his name to Cesar Chavez and then changed his party to run for Congress in my mostly Democratic and Hispanic district.

@Dodgerblue: The fact that they have to compete and share money/power with anyone who’s not a white male now that they can no longer flagrantly discriminate?

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: Lovely. ETA: the name change.

“Douchecanoe.” I like it, and it has been added to my douchetastic vocabulary.

TJ/ Has anyone lived in Kansas? Laughing NOT allowed.

@JNOV: I was on tour there once. I may have spent as much as three days.

@nojo: This 150,000 deal. Does it entail an honorarium or stipend of some kind? Plus, if a tribute is planned, I don’t fly business.

@nojo: Someday we all hope our plinth will come.

The Vuvu is back?! Occasionally I understand the blurb.

Okay, so, look. I want one of those minihouses, but I hate The Tiny House Movement. Movement? Gah. It might have been a movement 25 years ago or something. Now it’s a fad.

They are making bank on a movement, and it’s like, it’s nice to have floor plans, but why charge ~$800 for them? Why sell trailers ($4k-6k) modified for tiny houses? Regular trailers work fine.

Buncha dumbasses who want to live off the grid kvetching about getting fucking water and power lines to their homes. Rain barrels? Hello? Mosdef not Amish.

ETA: Probably not a good idea in Kansas.

@JNOV: I lived in Great Bend briefly in the early 80s.

@Mistress Cynica: I applied for a job at Ft. Riley. The job would be awesome, but the location, errr… It gets cold there.

I’ve also applied for jobs in Spokane because Smoke Signals sun. I like Spokane. This business going on at my job is untenable, so I have to look. Thank Clinton for FMLA.

@JNOV: It does get cold. And hot. And windy. Also, it’s flat and treeless. The landscape is actually more boring than that in Oklahoma. But if flat fields of wheat under cloudless skies are your thing, hot diggity.

@JNOV: The new chairman of the Confederated Tribes of the Colville Reservation is a guy who did the soundtrack for Smoke Signals. Dude looks like a long haired Indian biker artist. Our new partner will probably get us some work up there, so I may find myself in Seattle/Portland from time to time.

@Mistress Cynica: Heh. Yeah. I’m going to pass on Kansas.

@redmanlaw:

1. You in Seattle will be AWESOME.
2. B.C. Smith (I have the soundtrack. Yes, yes I do)
3. I’ll look him up.

I just read Indian Killer by Alexie. Impressive.

My kid has me reading about androids and electric sheep, and I have a sad about the lead cod pieces and pretending that your animal is real to avoid embarrassment.

Lead codpieces must weigh you down.

@JNOV: “Lead codpieces must weigh you down.”

I’ll defer to Benedick for the answer to that question.

@SanFranLefty: They must go well with his assless chaps.

I know I’m on the wrong thread, but do any of these hotels have balconies so I can get drunk and chain smoke enjoy the deluge ocean breeze. I think the ocean is somewhere around here. The islands have me confused.

@JNOV: I think the Moore Hotel has a roof.

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