Are You Ready for Some Soccer??

Those of you who are obsessive Simpsons viewers will get the headline.

And to answer Bloggie’s question on the previous post, NBC is going to start carrying broadcasts of English Premier League football [soccer to you Yanks]. The following promo ad is better than a wrap-around on a subway car.

Wrap-around ad, you wankers, get your minds out of the gutter!

And yes, Christopher Guest could – and should – totally extend this hilarious clip into a full-length movie, preferably with his Best in Show/Spinal Tap colleagues and Will Farrell involved.


Only the pre 21st century Simpsons…

Of course there will be animated arguments between old guys about who was better between Liverpool and Man U while they both mock the guy who is a Tottenham fan.

@ManchuCandidate: Simpsons still around? Haven’t watched since Conan left.

@nojo: When Mr. SFL and I drove through (and spent the night) and the Nojo Overlord Ory-gun Homeland, we mused as to why the Town of Springfield to the east of U-gene didn’t embrace its Simpsons connection and milk it for massive tourist $$s. We had the same conversation a week later when we drove through Aberdeen, WA (hometown of Kurt Cobain) and were greeted by a giant sign at town limits that said “Welcome to Aberdeen. Come As You Are.”

@SanFranLefty: While we all knew from the start that Springfield was Springfield — Groening’s a Portland boy, after all — he didn’t fess up to it until recently, so there was nothing to publicize.

Also, Springfield has a well-deserved inferiority complex to Sister City Eugene, and I don’t think folks there would care to be the butt of even more jokes.

@nojo: Someone tell me about Portland. The VA is fucking us over big time. I’d like be near Olympia -> Tacoma, WA. I don’t want to lose Rainer, but things are looking baaaad at the VBA. They’re playing Hide the Ball too much.

And I’m drunk.

@SanFranLefty: Thank you for earlier. I didn’t know how to respond. :-( Sent you an email.

@SanFranLefty: I didn’t see the Come as You Are sign. I just saw a sad city.

No one here seems to know how to pronounce shit like “Satsop.” A native Washingtonian from Puyallup said that’s how the NDNs pronounced it. I told him that that’s bullshit because “Seattle” WASN’T DUDE’S NAME! It was “Set” or “Seth” depending on the pronunciation. But it sure as shit wasn’t “Seattle.” I told him they’re a bunch of illiterate fucks. (He and I get along.)

I like Montesano. I need to find a fucking commune. I’ll google it.

Get the fuck outta here!

That’s a shitass list. But there’s this:

Isn’t there some crazy chick in Yelm who “channels” some dead dude? I bought my composting worms from Yelm. I’m not joining her commune or any Heaven’s Gate shit or one that doesn’t let people visit. I’d rather disappear, which I guess is anti-commune. But shit. But I’m not at DEFCON Suicide Cult.

@JNOV: You wanna Looming Mountain over the cityscape, Portland has one. It also (still) has a bookstore worth driving up two hours from Eugene.

But despite friends in the area, I’ve never really considered it livable — and that’s before the Hipster Hordes began been snuffing it out with smug. Not really that much to PDX, wayyyyy too much of WashCo and Lake Oswego. I’d get claustrophobic fast.

@JNOV: I almost never go to PDX unless I’m driving to the airport. Too many people, too much traffic, too many bridges (I have severe gephyrophobia — the very idea of driving across the Fremont Bridge gives me a panic attack). Powell’s makes me claustrophobic. Don’t get me started on the impossibly confusing street layout. I thought it would be a place I’d really like, but in fact I’ll go to great lengths to avoid it. Only the opportunity to see dear friends will lure me up there.

I like Portland, where I am right now, but you have to consider that I grew up in L.A. I’m going to walk over to Powell’s later today and contribute to the local economy. My wife and I are considering buying a condo or something up here to be near the now-married daughter and (one hopes) grandkids to come, and also a mere hour’s drive to Cyn’s Cocktail Corner.

@JNOV: I absolutely love the Pearl District. It’s one of those historic, fantastically walkable, revitalized urban areas where one easily could live, no car required. One of the best neighborhoods in the US. Plus, it’s very easy to visit, as you may catch the Amtrak from King Street Station in Seattle–which goes directly to Union Station in the Pearl District–and then walk or take a taxi to a hotel.

@Dodgerblue: A mere hour’s drive through hell, mind you. Washington County will disabuse you of romantic Portland fantasies right quick.

@Dodgerblue: Congrats. I hope the wedding was wonderful : )

@Dodgerblue: Of course, being from Orygun, I’m fascinated by the ahistoricity and sprawl of Southern California. It’s like being unmoored from humanity. In a good way.

That, and the weather.

@JNOV: Ugh, Olympia! Beautiful but hideously damp. Puyallup is totally sweet though, with direct access to TCC and the great clay teacher Rick Mahaffey. I dream of getting back there. Saw an apartment for rent in the lovely old Stadium district building I lived in back in ’92.

@Dodgerblue: Yay!! That would be awesome. I’d even come to Portland to see you.
I can’t wait to see wedding pics. I’m sure it was fantastic.

Wait. This is left coast stuff, right? The ocean’s on the wrong side.

And plus, soccer? You’re fooling with me now.

We just watched some of Grand Hotel. Sensational production and design. Garbo’s perf is just about the most ludicrous thing ever filmed. I was weeping from laughter. The hub has always claimed that she reminded him of Daffy Duck and now I know why. Star dancers are not usually 6 ft tall with size 14 feet and loony maids.

@Benedick: A sun that doesn’t set over the ocean is no sun of mine.

@Benedick: The ocean placement really throws off my already weak sense of direction.

@SanFranLefty: Yes, we saw the “Come as You Are” sign today. We kept talking about how different it is here, like good different. We disagreed about the types of trees we were seeing, and we talked. And we didn’t worry about anything except finding the next bathroom. We might loop around on 101 tomorrow.

@karen marie might be peeking just a little: Tobi Vail is still there. ;-)

@¡Andrew!: I’ve been thinking about doing that. Better get on it before day turns into night.

@Dodgerblue: Mazel effin Tov!

@nojo and beneduck: It’s weird — the Pacific and Atlantic have different smells. You can smell them both before you see them, but the Pacific, up here at least, smells more like salt and dirt. The salt smell isn’t as strong. The Atlantic you can smell a mile away (literally). And no, it’s not the medical waste.

@karen marie might be peeking just a little: Puyallup is getting pretty built up. I was looking at Roy, Graham and Covington. Now that my job location might change again, I’m not looking. The goats will wait.

@JNOV: That is because you need to drive through one mile of salt mash to get to the ocean over here. Or around a sound or bay.

Haven’t been to Oregon in a long time but I used to love the drive from Florence to Depoe Bay.

Isn’t Springfield where all the lumber mills and stripper bars are located on the west side of Eugene?

@DElurker: Stripper bars to the west; Springfield and Weyerhauser to the east.

It’s Weyerhauser that turned Springfield into Stenchfield; nothing like the smell of smokestacks in the morning.

Also, Florence to Depoe Bay is all the Oregon Coast anyone needs. I still have a hard time adjusting to what passes for beaches in Sandy Eggo.

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