In Related News, Michael Vick to Host Mittens Fundraiser in May

Well, not really, but I’m starting to wonder what’s up with Mittens and his fellow dog abusers.

From Dogs Against Romney:

On Monday, Romney will be the beneficiary of a fundraiser that is being hosted for him by Fred Malek. Who is Malek? He is the former President of Marriott Hotels and Northwest Airlines; former assistant to U.S. Presidents Richard Nixon and H.W. Bush; and former National Finance Committee Co-Chair for John McCain’s 2008 presidential campaign.

Fred Malek is also part of a group of men who were arrested after killing and barbecuing a dog in a city park in Peoria, IL in 1959.

Stinquers who are old enough to remember Watergate may also know Malek as the Nixon advisor who vowed to drive all the Jews out of the Labor Department.

But really, barbecuing a dog? What kind of sick twisted fuck would do that? Sadly, it is true. WARNING: The following may shock and horrify anyone who has a conscience or a shred of humanity.

A 2006 Washington Post column by Colbert King profiling him describes the incident and Malek’s explanation:

On a Friday in August 1959, five men in their twenties were arrested about 2 a.m. and held in the county jail all day after sheriff’s deputies found a blood-spattered, unoccupied car about 1:15 a.m. at the entrance to Vicary’s Park on Kickapoo Creek Road near Peoria, Ill.

Joined by Sheriff Harry P. Backes, two deputies had found two men walking toward the park entrance; the two men told the deputies that they had struck a dog and were going to bury it.

Further investigation revealed three others hiding in some weeds, the sheriff said. Because the men’s car was saturated with blood and they gave conflicting stories at the time of their arrest, Sheriff Backes thought there might have been a connection between the dog incident and a strong-arm robbery earlier in the evening.

After checking the blood-spattered pants of one of the men at the state crime laboratory in Springfield, it was determined that the stains were animal and not human blood. Backes said the men then changed their story and said they had “caught a dog and were barbecuing it.”

Police then found the skinned animal on a spit in the park. The insides of the dog had been removed, and a bottle of liquor was found on a nearby park table. Backes said the men told him they had been drinking earlier in the evening at a West Bluff tavern.

One of the men arrested in the incident, in which a dog was killed, skinned, gutted and barbecued on a spit, was Frederick V. Malek, 22, of Berwyn, Ill.

Charges of cruelty to animals were later dismissed against Malek and three other men after Andrew P. O’Meara testified that he had struck and killed the dog with a piece of 2-by-4, and that he alone had skinned the animal and tried to cook it. O’Meara said he was trying to show Malek and the others something about living off the land.

This account is based on two 1959 news articles, one on Aug. 8 and one on Aug. 11, in the Peoria Journal Star newspaper.

Before obtaining the articles from the Journal Star, I spoke with Malek by phone yesterday. He said he and O’Meara went to Peoria in the summer of ’59 to visit friends at Bradley University. They got drunk out of their minds at the time. He said he didn’t know why O’Meara had killed the dog, that he was not a participant and that he was in no position to stop it.

Given Mittens’ little Seamus problem, you would have thought that someone on his campaign would have considered the optics of hanging out with Malek.


Even when I’m drunk out of my mind, I still couldn’t even think of BBQing a dog. Maybe eating a fully loaded meatball sub or a plate of poutine, but that’s about it.

And I come from a people who are well known to feast on dog.

I’ve been reading all this Raymond Chandler. “Seamus” just means “private investigator” to me now. Also, snub-nosed revolvers are strangely appealing, although the frequency with which people die in Chandler’s stories makes me suspect that a far better choice would be to do anything other than being a private investigator. The protagonist (or at least the narrator) never dies, but that’s just because the story would have to stop part way through.

This has been your hard-bitten detective lit threadjack, with IanJ. We now return you to this dog-abuse thread, already in progress.

@ManchuCandidate: there’s a huge difference between eating a pet-quality dog and eating one that was raised for teh purpose.

Not that I support the eating of dog. But I am arguementative and bossy by nature.

@IanJ: The private dick is a shamus.

Although you sent me dictionary-foraging with that one. Near as the linguists can tell, shamus is just an Americanization of seamus, which means — wait for it — James.

And now I’m really lost: How did James become hard-nosed slang for Private Eye?

I’m going to say it: Dog, chicken, cat, rabbit, hamster, nutria, cow–I see no hierarchy of animals if they were going to eat the dog.

If they killed the dog for kicks, yes, that is very sick.

But we kill all sorts of animals in truly fucked up ways after they lived short fucked up lives so we can get huge amounts of cheap protein that we don’t even need.

@IanJ: I have a snub nose .38/.357 ruger SP 101 revolver that I really like a lot. It was the second gun I got when I got serious about filling out my handgun selection. Although it has fixed sights, it’s very accurate at the 7-10 yard range. Its mass and. grips soak up the recoil even with .357s. I put Crimson Trace laser grips to help aim in low light, so it’s not totally old school. Holds five rounds.

Romney-backer Michael Vick and Malek should bond over their love of dogs ….

On the Seamus/shamus thing…

Hey, relax man, I’m a brother shamus.
Brother Shamus? Like an Irish monk?
What the fuck are you talking about? My name’s Da Fino! I’m a private snoop! Like you, man!

At my first LebowskiFest in LA seven years ago, I found Brother Seamus and taped this:

@I’m passing for white: Stealing a dog and beating it to death with a 2×4 until blood splatters everywhere, then skinning it and putting it on a skewer for some fucked-up drunken stunt is a little bit different than raising cows for slaughter. I am the first to note that slaughterhouses suck, and I make a real effort to buy any meat products from the organic hippies at the ferry building who have raised the cow or chicken and given it shiatsu massages and try to kill the animal in a painless matter. The consumption of meat and the torture of an animal are not morally equivalent. Animals killed for food are supposed to be slaughtered in humane manners, per the law. Whether that happens is a matter of enforcement – the failure to adhere to these laws and moral precepts doesn’t excuse shit like what Malek did.

The fact that a person eats meat (hello, humans are ominvores!) doesn’t mean she or he can’t condemn cruelty to animals. If they had stolen a pig or a chicken and beaten it to death with a 2×4 for shit and giggles, it would have been morally repugnant.

So it’s giving this sociopathic fuck a major pass to somehow say what he did is no different than eating bacon or steak. There is a difference. It’s not an either/or, and it is simplistic to argue such.

@I’m passing for white: Plus, it was 1959. I’m more concerned with this dude’s Nixon-Bush-McCain connection.

@ManchuCandidate: you’re French?

All based on the “dog meant as food assumption”:

Stealing a dog…

“Caught” or “stolen”?

and beating it to death with a 2×4

Not the most painless way to go, but unless you kill your food yourself, you are buying pre-killed, pre-gutted and pre-skinned dead animals and relying on the word of the people who sell you animal flesh when it comes to how those animals lived and died.

until blood splatters everywhere, then skinning it and putting it on a skewer for some fucked-up drunken stunt is a little bit different than raising cows for slaughter.

Are you sure? These are sober people.

The consumption of meat and the torture of an animal are not morally equivalent.

Most animals are tortured before we consume them. Again–if you didn’t kill it yourself, you really don’t know how it died.

I’m not talking about moral equivalency, because, if you really stop to think about it, killing for meat is killing for meat. None of these animals die of natural causes, and I bet if they’d beat a rat, skinned and skewered it, no one would be losing their shit quite this way.

Simplistically argued, eating animals you didn’t kill yourself is participating in dirty business that more often than not involves torture. Omnivores (hello!) should wake up and own it and not think that they are morally superior because they think that what they’re eating lived a full, happy life and was anesthetized before it was killed.

We get to pay extra for that rationalization leap of faith.

Would that pastured cow rather be grazing or on a plate?

N.B. I’m fine with people eating meat. I ate some tonight. It wasn’t bad, but it was quite dead.

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