We Hear Volney is Lovely During Burnt Sacrifice Season

OK. Appeal to Stinque Law. As you all know (pause for sighs and eyerolls) the OH, now officially known as The Hubby, and I were married in Canada. Hubby, who is not a marcher, has got all up in da grillz re the recent vote in NY to destroy western civilization (quick nod to topic while passing at 80mph waving) and wants to get remarried here. I tell him, we are married, ya big lug, we can’t marry again. That’s polygamy. Question is: once you’re married you’re married, right? Even though it could mean a registry for the good stuff at Crate and Barrel and a lavish vegetarian feast in Woodstock with drumming circle and wiccan blessings?

Volney is so far west in NY it’s practically Wyoming.

@Benedick HRH KFC: Sorta kinda yeah, but, DOMA threw out privileges or immunities w/r/t same-sex marriage. If you’re married in another state or country, that marriage is usually recognized under the privileges or immunities clause of the 14th Amendment unless it’s a same sex marriage. It’s not polygamy to be married to the same person twice; just don’t add someone else to the mix, and you’re cool.

I think the issue of remarrying someone if you haven’t been divorced from them and your current marriage to the same partner is recognized in your state falls under state law. Some people have recommitment (or whatever they’re called) ceremonies, but I’d call your county clerk and see if you can get a marriage license in your state. What could it hurt?

@Benedick HRH KFC: I’ve sent the question out to the universe. I’ll let you know if anyone out there has a clue.

Totally unrelated:

Has IEEE Spectrum been borrowing headline writers from Fox Nation? Check this out:

Obama Commanding Robot Revolution, Announces Major Robotics Initiative

OK, it’s no “Obama has a problem with white women”, but I loled when I remembered the old SNL bit about Old Glory Insurance… ;)

Er…anyone else getting an ad to dress like Lolita? http://www.milanoo.com/wholesale-Lolita-Clothing-c634?Promotion=MBYGICM&gclid=CNud_YPq2akCFY0H2godPg4jaA

First things first: clerk does not equal “priest.” Sign the papers, stamp the certificates, close at 5pm sharp. Public Fucking Official. But we all knew this.

@Benedick: IIRC, New York administratively recognized the ghey marrying, but it was neither a part of state case law or statutory law. Which means your marriage is a matter of bureaucratic grace at the moment.

Polygymy is married to more than one victim (er, beloved) at one time. So you’re not in that league yet, and wouldn’t be if you double-tied the knot.

Consult your local law talking guys for definitive answers. Your mileage may vary.

Of course they had to run out immediately and find some bigot in a minor position of power. Like the pharmacists who refuse to fill prescriptions for Plan B or birth control, this bitch needs to be fired.

Anybody get an invite from Google+ ?

@Benedick HRH KFC: Holy crap! You make a single reference to Crate&Barrel and now I have the Not the MSNBC ad for Crate&Barrel. I did not realize you wielded that much control over the system of tubes. Are you really Al Gore?

@Dave H: Hammacher-Schlemmecher.

You’re welcome.

As to the rest of you: Right, dazzle me with your law degree talk. All I need to know is do I need to remarry the son of a bitch before either or both of us start drooling down our nighties.

@Benedick HRH KFC: I spoke with a NYS family law attorney and she said that you don’t have to get married again in NYS. Sorry to bust OH’s bubble but New Yawk had been recognizing valid out of state and out of country ghey weddings for several years, your marriage was already recognized by the state, so there’s no legal need to redo it unless you want a stamped license that isn’t stained with maple syrup and says “Eh” four times in it.

I have friends out here who got married in Vancouver, then got married during the 2004 window when Gavin was handing out licenses in Ess Eff, and got married again in 2008 post-Cal Sup Ct and pre-Prop H8. And that doesn’t count the commitment ceremony they had before any of the weddings. So girlfriends are well stocked in the Williams-Sonoma and Crate & Barrel swag.

The key is that you have to marry the same person – like CB said then it’s not polygamy.

So there is no legal reason that you’d need to do it again in NY unless you’re looking for an excuse to spend money on a party and/or get swag for your kitchen or garden and/or have some of your friends who weren’t there the first time come around and get drunk and pass out on the dance floor.

@SanFranLefty and Bene: I assumed that Hubby wanted a NY wedding not b/c he thought that the Canadian one wasn’t valid in NY (Patterson took care of that), but because it would mean something to be married in the state in which you choose to live. I think the question isn’t are they married so much as can they also have a wedding ceremony in NY. If that’s the case, I say DO IT! Seriously. Do it (assuming there’s no prohibition against it b/c of the Canadian marriage).

Do it because it’s been a right you were denied for way fucking too long, Bene. Do it because you will add to the number of people in the US who are claiming this right and creating a more easily measurable group who are like, “Yes. We are here. We love each other. We’re married. We were married in our home state.” Take your wedding rings from Canada and wear them on your left/right hands and wear your NY ones on your right/left ones. And invite me so I can see the willow. The wedding would be nice, too. :-)

There’s always the “renewal of the vows.” They do it in the Catholic church, but I’m sure the secular world has something similar.

@redmanlaw: Yes, but I see something that could extend beyond the happy couple. Sexual preference, gender identity, the statistics we have for all that good stuff are self-reported from surveys and not always reliable. People still argue about the percentage of the population that identifies as GLBT because the data aren’t great.

I don’t mean to look at this from a demographer’s POV, but I can’t help it. The best data w/r/t committed same-sex couples that could possibly force a solution out of suspension and encourage other states to follow suit are data demonstrating that there are X number of legally-married same-sex couples in these five states, one commonwealth, the Coquille rez in Oreygun, and DC.

So, again, Bene, please do it. Do it for the good time we’ll you’ll have (I’ll make you commemorative soaps ;-P ), do it because you live in a state that has made it law (and FSM forbid some sort of shitty ass injunction comes down the pike in the near future), do it for the people who live in the US and are still denied this fundamental right, and do it because it puts you on record in the only way that government seems to understand. You’re not a bean, but people count beans nonetheless, especially beans who vote.

@Benedick HRH KFC:

I’d get re-married in NY, if I were you, Benedick.

Here’s why:
It is true that then-Governor Paterson decreed that SSM from other jurisdictions would be recognized in NY.

And there is some case law holding that NY’s legal marriage recognition rule would also require recognition of marriages performed elsewhere.

However, there’s no law to that effect, the state’s highest court hasn’t so ruled, and . . . hey, it’s only $40 to get a license, so why not?

More legal protection = better. Plus, Crate & Barrel gift registry. It’s a win-win.

Good god, people. Confuse me. But thanks for the advice. I’m calling the AG’s office. I like JNOV’s point about the counting. I’d thought something similar. But you have to understand that the whole idea is pretty risible as far as I’m concerned. I barely got through the first time without crying from laughter when my intended lost my ring, we had to stop the ceremony (in the garden of a charming B&B near St Catherines. We were their first gays so they had a friend record show-tunes on a piano. As I said “I Do,” Don’t Cry For Me, Argentina was playing in the background.) and hunt all over the place till he found it on his right pinky where he’d put it for safe keeping.

@rachaelm5: I’d be too embarrassed to actually invite anyone I know to witness such a farrago.

I suppose we could elope to Volney. It’s not all that far. Last time, to add to the comedy, we were married by a Unitarian lady minister.

@SanFranLefty: I have rings from the civil union, commitment, etc.

@JNOV: I’d look good in that mauve one.

@Benedick HRH KFC: Can I be the flower girl? I’ll wear my mauve loligoth frock!

@Benedick HRH KFC: Well?

@Tommmcatt Be Fat, And That Be That: You look good in everythang.

@Tommmcatt Be Fat, And That Be That: We’ll pull weeds flowers from Bene’s gardens and make wreaths for our heads and throw all manner of plant material on the aisle as we prance in our CFM boots and our LOLita shifts (I want red one, naturally).

I think Mr. and Mr. Bene should have a mehndi the night before so we can henna them up and smack them in the forehead with rice.