Loves Me Like a Rock

You may recall the squirmish a few years ago around Sally Kern, an Oklahoma state representative who wasn’t afraid to stand up for straight thinking:

Studies show that no society that has totally embraced homosexuality has lasted more than, you know, a few decades. So it’s the death knell of this country.

The response was, well, fierce — if by “fierce” we mean that a rally against her remarks drew all of 300 souls, while fingers tapped furiously nationwide:

Thousands have sent e-mails criticizing state Rep. Sally Kern for comments that were posted on the Internet in which she calls homosexuality “the biggest threat our nation has, even more so than terrorism or Islam,” the legislator said today.

And then America moved on to the next circus. This was March 2008, after all — that year’s fun was just getting started.

Jump cut three years. Sally Kern is still an Oklahoma state representative, having been handily reelected by what must be her equally bigoted constituency in 2008 and 2010. She’s doing just fine — and hey, she even has a new book out in July!

The Stoning of Sally Kern: The liberal attack on Christian conservatism — and why we must take a stand

Now there’s a provocative metaphor! We’re sure a good Christian woman like Sally Kern knows that stoning was a form of execution, and since Sally Kern is still very much alive — if dead in her soul — the Amazon wiseacre who tagged her book “delusional self-martyring harpie” is probably on the right track.

Then again, since we’re essentially bringing Leviticus into the conversation, Official Stonable Offenses there include bestiality, blasphemy, intercourse with one’s daughter-in-law, intercourse with one’s mother, intercourse with one’s stepmother, cursing a parent, necromancy, offering one’s children to Molech, pederasty, and Pythonism — the last referring to prophesying, not absurdist comedy.

So if Sally Kern really wants to go there, we suggest convening a special court and passing judgment on her. Because if predicting that America will collapse in a few decades over the bedroom habits of consenting adults isn’t Pythonism, we don’t know what is.

Every Christian Must Get Stoned [Weigel]

I dunno. From the history I’ve read, nations that embrace religious/political fundamentalism tend to go off cliffs, too. In fact, much faster than embracing teh ghey. Mostly because of the duh.

It would not surprise me if we learn that Sally Kern has written one more book than she’s read.

In related asshole wingnut news, out of Indiana:

Rep. Eric Turner thinks women will pretend to have been raped to take advantage of “loophole” in new abortion restrictions

ADD: see also this, which reminds us that Gov. Walker was already a hard-core class-warrior back in the day…

I wish a news channel had the stones to put “Delusional Self-Martyring Harpie” under Talibunny’s name the next time she goes on the teevee.

take away Mistress Cynica’s belt and shoelaces.


Speaking of stoning, the OH (who just joined the NY Times fer cryinoutloud) and I were feeling a little down in the gay last night so we watched a Joan Crawford movie we’d neither of us seen entitled Daisy Kenyon. Right off the bat you know that Crawford is 15 years too old to be playing the part but it’s an extremely well-done moral melodrama that, had the women been in poke bonnets and the men in thigh-hugging moleskin breeches could very well pass muster as one of Ms. Austen’s minor oeuvre. Henry Fonda is so smart and adorable and acts so well (in bow-ties yet, a career first) his performance should be shown to actors to demonstrate how to act somewhat purple dialogue to make it not only real but sexy. And there’s a near-rape scene in which Crawford, who did this kind of thing very well, pummels Dana Andrews’s face in a way that looks like she has her full body-weight behind it. Impressive and quite scary. Also some very striking black and white cinematography, the aftermath of a car crash in the snow is particularly good with a very striking set, and beautiful close-ups.

So if it’s Sport season and you’ve already seen Humoresque (those are Heifitz’s fingers working the strings) I recommend this period disquisition on desire and responsibility on west 12th street. It’s not easy to overlook the mutton-dressed-as-lamb aspect (whoever recommended that our star sport quite so many peter-pan collars was not a friend) but respect should be paid to a woman who really did fight her way to the top of a blisteringly tough industry to make everyone’s life miserable.

Nojo, just out of curiosity, you do realize that “squirmish” isn’t a word, right? It’s “skirmish.”


They got all the latest words,
They’re dancing to the latest beat.

–Joni Mitchell, “Cotton Avenue”

@IanJ: With sheer joy.

ADD: I never cared much for “refudiate”, which just disturbed a letter. But “squirmish” opens up a whole new adventure of meaning. It’s irresistable.

@nojo: That is a delicious new word, and frankly I’m shocked we got along without it until now. I second embracing it regardless of its specious origins.

I really love you guys. Such as.

I guess, in the face of countless other dipshit neologisms, how can I really complain? And I mean that with love. Yes, that kind. Especially to Benedick.

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