Is Bernie Still Talking?

6:59 pm ET: “No, but he’s still awesome!”

That website asks people to donate to “Bernie” at a fundraising site for Democrats.

Okay. This is just so fucking sad. Sanders is beyond awesome, but he’s screaming into a vacuum. I’m going to propose the unproposable: maybe it would have been better if McCain had been elected. Then Dems in Congress would have an enemy besides themselves and could rally around the Donkey. And maybe the midterms would have swung the other way and given the Donkeys an even larger majority. And then maybe inevitable vetoes would be overridden. And maybe Congress would fucking run this country as the framers intended. And run it for the good of constituents besides fucking Wall Street.

But, no. We’ve got this lone dude from a teeny state talking like I thought Obama would. Fuck me sideways.

@JNOV: That would have meant VP Talibunny. No please.

@IanJ: Indulge me some more. VP Talibunny, scary as it sounds, would be another reason to rally around the Donkey. If moderate Rs are scared of her, how do you think independents would react? She’d either be caged, or she’d torpedo R ambitions for years. Cheney is the only Veep who has had any real power in recent history. Compared to Cheney, Palin is nothing.

@JNOV: John McCain is supernaturally old and might die at any moment. The Talibunny at that point would have launch codes. San Francisco would be a smoldering pile of ash, and she would have started a world war by confusing North Korea with Taiwan and invading. Also: Gay Asian Bondage and Fetish Sites, banned.

In short, no.

@Tommmcatt is with Karin Marie on This One: John McCain is five years older than Bernie. Okay, that’s a lot in dog years, but Congress DERP the president has decent access to healthcare, and he’s still alive.

Launch codes? You still have the two-man rule no matter what lunatic is at the helm.

Life has become better for gheyz under Hopey? How so?

Gay Asian Bondage and Fetish Sites: tunnels and torrent.

@JNOV: Really? He looks so old I thought his staff rouster includes a necromancer.

As for Hopey, I’m not any better off as a gay man, but the number of bishonen hentai sites had increased exponentially. So there’s that.

Also, too: tunnels? Is that some new tech thing I have no idea about?

@Tommmcatt is with Karin Marie on This One: heh.

ixnay with the entaihay, and tunnels — don’t wanna get b&nv&…

(Stock up on porn while you still can.)

Hey Y’all, missed yous

the hell you been?

@Promnight: Yeah, man, I thought we started boring you or something.

@Promnight: WTF happened to you? You okay? How’s the Missus? Tell her hello for me. Y Promnight Junior?

@SanFranLefty: Prom has some ‘splanin’ to do.

/switches from Malbec to gin

Fucking grocery store steak tasted like cardboard tonight.

Bernie just posted this on FB:

Thank you very much for contacting my office in opposition to the recent tax deal struck between President Obama and the Republican leadership. The response from Vermonters and Americans all across the country was far beyond anything we could have imagined. As of this writing, we received a total of more than 10,000 phone calls and 9,324 e-mails. More than 98 percent of the responses were in opposition.