The Center for Public Integrity has a new report out about the incestuous ties between the incoming GOP committee chairs and Corporate America. The cynic in me is certain it would not be very hard to do a similar analysis of the current Democratic chairs.

But I was more mesmerized by the sea of Wonder Bread on the cover of the report. Check out the diversity! Some of the men even have brown eyes!

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Boehner will be a TeeVee-dinner-coloured AmeriKKKan in a sea of cream cheese.

Kee-rist, Ah’m hungrys.

Are they organised by colour or by personality disorder?

Issa is of Lebanese descent and identifies as Arab American, so they’ve got that going for them. On a related note, with Burris out, there will be no black Senators come January.

Like Faces of Meth, but with a dental plan.

whatchoo mean? there is plenty of diversity. from pathetic combovers to pasty balding pates to Ryans luxurious locks.

no diversity. pffft.

@¡Andrew!: If there was a like button on here like there is on the Facebox, I’d salute you, sir.

@rptrcub:

I’m practising my Canadian; can you tell? Just in case… you know…

@¡Andrew!:
No, eh?

As nojo pointed out. It’s oot and aboot.

I threatened Manchu with playing the South Park movie if he kept that up.

@¡Andrew!: Glad someone got the reference.

ADD: @mellbell: Duly noted w/r/t Issa, I’m still recovering from the shock that any Republican, let alone a fire-and-brimstone one, would self-identify as Arab-American. And Lebanese? Is that a type of lesbian? Who’s the real ghey-loving Kenyan Socialist Mooslem?

@ManchuCandidate: I’ll have to work on my horrid AmeriKKKan accent, eh? I’ve noticed that the foreigns NEVER comment on a lovely US accent–definitely not in the way that I swoon over certain English, French, and Spanish accents. The more sophisticated US Southern accents also turn my crank up to 12.

A non-native speaker once told me that US English sounds like geese-honking to those unfamiliar with the language.

To paraphrase a classic line from “Go”, if these guys were any LESS black they’d be clear. :)

@¡Andrew!: I would have to say the worst Southern accent is from Appalachia. I find Charleston and Savannah nice and refined.

This is why I can listen to Lindsey Graham talk even though he’s a dimwit (he’s from the Lowcountry in South Carolina). Jim Demint is from supermegajeebus land in Upstate South Carolina. There are many places in this region that would make me slit my wrists if I had to live there, and Greenville is one of them.

@mellbell: The next Senate will also be RPCV-less for the first time in 30 years. Hurrah, anti-service xenophobia!

@¡Andrew!: @rptrcub: I grew up between Greenville and Spartanburg, and I can tell you that none of my family talk like DeMented. Not to put too fine a point on it, it’s a class thing. Upper class/Tidewater Southern accents are usually pretty, and even the English think so. But cubbie is right, nothing is worse than that hillbilly Appalachian accent.

@Mistress Cynica: @¡Andrew!: @rptrcub: I’ve found that just about all ESL people have a helluva time with western twang though. They’re likelier to understand the thickest Irish brogue than someone from Tejas.

@rptrcub:

Did you know that some Shakespeare scholars believe that the modern dialect that is most like that of that spoken when Middle English was used is the dialect used by the people in Appalachia? They base it on migration patterns, isolation, etc.

@rptrcub @Mistress Cynica: A couple of my favorite clients just moved back to Raleigh-Chapel Hill, NC, and I’ve been working with them and their colleagues recently. I was so pleased to talk with them on the phone and discover that they all have the same adorable accent.

@Mistress Cynica: Upper class/Tidewater Southern accents are usually pretty, and even the English think so.

Everybody had to be taught that the philosophy prof from England was actually from Georgia.

After which, they would learn that he was also Leonard Cohen’s cousin.

@nojo: He must have been getting laid right and left, this being the 70s when screwing your professor was still OK.

@Mistress Cynica: Mid-Eighties, he was a Gentleman, and enjoying a long, happy, marriage.

And, well, philosophy. No girls.

Well, one. I think she’s teaching in Lancaster now.

@flippin eck: Hm, they are bad at that. What is that, a Delsarte revival?

The dialect is interesting, though.

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