Actually, That’s Two Words …

Well, its not on topic but damn, I have been having genuine strep throat, for the last week, it dropped me like a punch from Tyson when he was Tyson, starting last sunday, could not sleep, swallowing hurt so much, went to urgent care Monday because regular doc couldn’t fit me in, got a scrip for Azelox, I think, its a Cipro-relative, heavy gun, and I continued to get worse, no solid food, liquids only, and no sleep at all, all night. Fucking throat HURT. Got in to see my regular Doc wednesday, it was that or the ER, we were panicking about my night-sweats soaking all the bedclothes. Regular doc, very very cool indian guy, who talks to me like an equal because I am older and we are both professionals, he looks at my throat and he says, “oh, you really have strep throat, 95% of those I treat, they don’t realy have it, its just viral, but this, this is strep throat.” OK, but then, he says, “I shouldn’t say,”, he pauses, I said, like I said, he’s really cool, and genuinely treats me as an equal, and he was looking at me as if torn between being truly, 100% honest, or doing the “doctor” schtick, I could see he made up his mind and he says “I shouldn’t say this, but thats the worst case I have ever seen.” Genuine honesty won out.

OK, I think if I were older or weaker, he would have put me in the hospital then, but he says I am already on the strongest thing that I could get, and its normal for the antibiotic in these cases to take 3 days or more to work. So, after enquiring deeply into whether I was having any breathing problems, he let me go home, telling me to take acidophilus because this antibiotic was going to kill every last microbe in my colon, and I was gonna be sorry. And he scheduled me to come back 2 days later, which is today, and he said he would decide whether to hospitalize me then.

Anyway, it started getting better the next day, today I am doing well and was not admitted to the hospital.

But I had 3 days when I could not swallow, I could not eat solid food, I could not even bring myself to drink enough to stay hydrated, everything hurt, ice, popsicles, tea, broth, everything hurt so bad I could not get anything down. I could not sleep at all, because every time I swallowed, the pain woke me up. I carried a huge wad of papertowels everywhere, to drool into, because I could not stand the pain of swallowing my own saliva.

Its a common ailment, no big deal, but it fucked me over this week, subjectively. I just know I am celebrating it being over too soon. I feel like, a million dollars, tonight, but thats just because of what I felt like all week, if I woke up out of the blue feeling like this, I would freak.

@Promnight: We almost sent Men in Black to your neighborhood. Glad you back.

@redmanlaw: I truly really appreciated your email, I was not able to respond to anything, for a couple days there, really, helpless. But I was touched.

@Promnight: Dude, strep is a big deal. Before antibiotics it killed a lot of people. Take care of yourself. We were worried–hell, I was having to make tit jokes in your absence.
When you can eat something, yogurt will help with the intestinal side effects. Hope you feel better soon.

@Promnight: Glad you’re feeling better, and ALL medical professionals should treat patients like they’re “equals” and be “100% honest.” I mean, they are our employees after all…

@Mistress Cynica: Yes — I second the yogurt, made with raw milk if you can find it. Don’t want some sort of thrush in your throat to add to the strep.

TJ/ Quibble with the Vox Stinque. I don’t drink “cocktails.” I drink booze. Mmmkay?

@Promnight: Fuck, man, you need massive doses of Leinenkugel Berry Weiss. Your body is obviously depleted of necessary vitamins C and B.

@Promnight: Get yourself a good kefir. Tear them open in the supermarket and buy the one that smells the most pungent. Oh, man, I wish you were in Oz, if they still have the stuff there was a honey and raw yoghurt confection made by the Akitas people. Oh, man, I’d open that puppy up in the office and people would run for the exits. It had real biotic power.

@FlyingChainSaw: I’m all for raw honey and heiney.

@JNOV: If Prommie ever gets all over to the NJ Stinque.com campus, I will make you one of my hand crafted caipirinhas. You’ll like those.

@FlyingChainSaw: I’ll like anything you have to offer…

ADD: Où est la complexe?

@FlyingChainSaw: Where’s the campus, I am there.

I am going beddy-bye, I am being irresponsible by staying up late the first day I feel half-normal, FCS, the Leinenkugel Berry Weisse, from that first day you mentioned it here, has become my house beverage, and a family favorite, and all because of you.

@JNOV: He’s in New Jersey, on the coast someplace.

@Promnight: We’re all using Dextron II cans here and no one even drives a Ford, I have to tell you. Inspired interpretation of a traditional American beverage.

@Promnight: Darling! You’re back!!

Jesus H Christ on a Popsicle stick, this sounds like hell. And I’m with Cynica and Chainsaw – gag down as much yogurt as possible – your throat, stomach, and ass will thank you. (And take a moment to thank the FSM you’re not a woman and have to worry about the impact of cipro on the lady-bits).

@FlyingChainSaw: Dude. I live about 1 hour from Prom, and I work like 30 minutes from him. I am SO there! Do you ever check your fookin’ email, man?

@SanFranLefty and Prom: And from The Dept, of TMI, some Vaseline on your tukus will help with the burning from the DARS.

@JNOV: Wow. What email? Which one are you using? Try flyingchainsaw (the thing that looks like a whirlpool symbol) myway.com. It seems to work.

@Promnight: Great to hear. It is an essential part of any sound diet.

@FlyingChainSaw: K. Sent you two over the last year or so. Thought you hated me or something.

@JNOV: Where? The MyWay address? I am looking at it now and it’s all notices of replies to ravings I posted someplace. I answer all mail. Eventually!

@FlyingChainSaw: No, to another address. I just sent two to your Sinatra address.

@JNOV: Sinatra? Wow, I must have been on a vinyl jag that was running concurrently with an extended, ahem, healthful Brazilian confections when I minted that one because I have no recollection of it. Can you forward them to the fsc/myway account? That I can remember. Sorry about the mix up

@FlyingChainSaw: Dude. “My Way” is a Sinatra song. Check your inbox.

@JNOV: Oohhhhhhhhh! OK, that worked. Got the snuggy picture and everything. We command the technology!

For the record, I do not, have never, nor will I ever own, a Snuggie.

@Promnight: Sorry to hear this but very glad you’re feeling better. It’s hell. I had it once in Princeton when I was working. I couldn’t speak, couldn’t sing, could only shout. And as various parts of my chords got fucked I had to move to a different place in the voice. The doctor there told me to go to bed for at least three days. Had I been able to laugh I would have. My thoughts are with you. I don’t do yoghurt. I think I ate a lot of melon, if I remember aright. Funny you should come back from France and get strep. Not that I blame Les Franch, I’m just saying.