Headlines We Read Too Fast

Damn I want to lick that all over.

Is it too much to hope that Pope Prada’s private secretary Gorgeous George, well-known Euro-dish and Vatican hottie, will get caught with his mitre in his hand?

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: Mm-hmm.

“Ah wants mah socialized pissin’, goddammit!”

@redmanlaw:

where are all those republicans going for blow jobs?

@Benedick: The “Black Forest Adonis”? GMAFB.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: I’ve seen him in person here — not my type but there are some sexy vibrations eminating off of that man.

@redmanlaw: Seriously. That Sun City resident complaining that the state government just might have to raise taxes in order to pay for state services that she wants is…everything that’s wrong with this country, I think.

They closed all but three rest stops in Louisiana a few years ago, but there was not much outcry due to Louisianans having low expectations in the first place. Sad but true.

@finette: Virginia’s new Republican governor reopened their rest stops within days of taking office, with, of course, no explanation as to how they will be paid for.

@mellbell: Federal tax money paid by those of us in more productive states.

@Benedick: More like tax dollars from NoVa that would otherwise (who am I kidding?) should go to fixing Metro’s failing infrastructure.

“Paging Mr. Nabisco. Would Mr. Nabisco please pick up the white courtesy phone for an important message”:

“TMZ reports that police in Milledgeville, Georgia, have interviewed Roethlisberger about sexual assault claims made against him early this morning.”

http://deadspin.com/5486814/ben-roethlisberger-reportedly-accused-of-second-sexual-assault

@redmanlaw:

The comments are pretty choice on that one. Misogynist, but still, choice.

@rptrcub: @mellbell:

It’s the eyes….homina homina….

So what’s with these kamikaze wingnuts? If you’re gonna go on a suicide mission, shouldn’t you at least try to take out a high value target? The list of Bush Administration criminals is at least a mile long, and then there’s the banking/insurance/war industry/congressional puppet-masters.

Jeebus, those numbnuts can’t even do terrahizm right. Morans.

Didja know they’re 90 types of bitches?

I ‘spose I’m mostly a #17 – Bitches Who Think They Better Than Me – in the taxonomy, but I could also be a #59 – Gay Bitches or a #41 – Bitches Who Think They Hard.

Re: Mittens

The 18 year-old daughter of one of my clients got knocked up by one of the better-known (so I’m told) Seahawks. I think she named the kid Jackpot.

@finette: No joke, Sun City geezers are the reason Joe Arpaio is still in office years after his brain and his sanity left.

@Original Andrew: If I ever have a son I will totally call him Jackpot. In fact I might just change my own name. That is my favorite name I ever heard.

Funny thing is, I was just in the kitchen washing escarole and drinking Pinot Grigio and I’m thinking, hmmpf! this wine don’t do shit. And now I come here and read over what I just typed and I see that I am wrong.

@redmanlaw: Day-um. Have I mentioned before how a friend-of-a-friend says he is a total adolescent when it comes to the wimmins?