Sarah Palin Whores Knocked-Up Daughter to ABC

Jesus Christ, woman, if you want to keep your kids out of the public eye, keep them out of the public eye:

Bristol Palin, arguably the most famous teen mother in America, will make her acting debut playing herself on ABC Family’s “The Secret Life of the American Teenager,” the network announced today.

“I am thrilled to be on this show and to be part of a program that educates teens and young adults about the consequences of teen pregnancy,” Palin said in a statement.

Oh, we bet she’s thrilled. Just like any 19-year-old would be, whose mother keeps subjecting her to national ridicule.

Bristol Palin Makes Acting Debut as Teen Mom [ABC, via Raw Story]
19 Comments

@ManchuCandidate: If any of those kids escape their imprisonment, there are going to be some great stories.

I wonder who invented the best description ever of that family – snowbillies.

So Bristol Palin got herself pregnant and now she’s famous and gets to star on TV shows.

And this is supposed to discourage teen aged pregnancy how exactly?

@Serolf Divad: You end up with Sarah Palin as your mother.

I shamelessly spilled my seed into a vat of industrial pre-recycled polyethylene carpet fibers.

Out came a monster, over which I have no control.

I can haz now my VH1 reality TV contract please? Did I mention I play guitar, I mean, compose romantic poetry, I mean, dance a rockin’ pogo?

Pregnant Women are Smug by Garfunkle and Oates.

We laugh because it’s true.

@SanFranLefty: My best friend breeds. But I don’t hold it against her, or her girlfriend. Or her gayby-daddy.

Yet I could not do that.
No I could not.
I could not bring
Into this world a tot.

@blogenfreude:
FCS called her constituents ‘frozen hillbillys’ which i love.
my description for the palin clan? the aristocrats.
also the entire GOP.

@baked: I’m fucktastically amazed we’re still making much of a distinction between the GOP and the DNC.

It’s painfully obvious that both parties are only too eager to sell us out because they both truly subscribe to the corporatist oligarchical proto-fascist-neo-feudalist agenda.

Or more appropriately, they subscribe to whatever agenda their paymasters dictate to them.

The only difference is which target demographic each party panders to in order to fuck it over.

I am SO FINISHED with the fucking Democrats. They get zero from me until they begin to deliver on anything meaningful.

@Pedonator:
i agree. but the DNC can’t compete in debauchery.

@baked: Because they insist upon perpetuating the myth cliche that Democrats are wimps at heart.

Some of them need to get out there and start propositioning cops in public restrooms, or get caught in double-wet-suited auto-erotic asphyxiation scenarios. Or something.

OR ANYTHING! Jeebus Demrats, if you can’t give us useful healthcare reform at least give us something!

Don’t you understand that if you don’t give us true debauchery nobody will take you seriously, and countless otherwise apathetic college students will veer rightward because that’s where the party is?

@baked, Pedonator:

What are Eliot Spitzer and John Edwards? Chopped liver?

@SanFranLefty: No, they’re quitters who refused to brazen it out when they got caught.

ADD: OK, Edwards is a super-scumbag. But Spitzer? Quitter.

@Mistress Cynica: I’m still waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop regarding Sen. Bayh.

@SanFranLefty: He’s a shoe fetishist? I really can’t get into that. What Spitzer did, I can understand. But the shoe thing, or foot fetishism, no.

@Dodgerblue:

What’s not to get? Slender, clean, warm, shapely little brown feet. Yum.

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