Do Do Ron Ron

Let’s set the Not-So-Wayback Machine for last Wednesday and drop in on the National Journal…

The first skirmish in the war over the GOP WH nomination takes place this weekend among thousands of conservative activists, and veterans of previous straw polls see a tight battle between ex-MA Gov. Mitt Romney and ex-AK Gov. Sarah Palin developing at this week’s Conservative Political Action Conference.

In an informal survey of GOP party leaders, strategists, activists and pundits representing backers of virtually every potential candidate in the field, a narrow plurality say Palin will win this weekend’s straw poll. 22 of 48 GOPers surveyed chose Palin, while 20 chose Romney.

Whoops!

Of course, nobody expected Ron Paul to deny Mittens a fourth straight win as Biggest CPAC Loser. Nobody except the Paultards who punked the vote, of course.

And while we’ll agree that past failures are no guarantee of future failure, the only reason we paid attention to the CPAC Straw Poll was because everybody told us to.

So enjoy the disarray, gang. We’d enjoy it more ourselves, if Demrats only had a clue how to take advantage of it.

CPAC Vets See Tight Romney-Palin Race [Hotline On Call]

Ron Paul Runs Away With CPAC Straw Poll [Village Voice]

26 Comments

There was a teeeny tiny link to a teeny tiny story about this on Fox News yesterday. Can’t even find it now. Pretty good sign that the powers that be in the GOP want these results buried and forgotten. You can bet that if Palin or Romney had won the straw poll Fox would be all over the story.

We’re all Paultards now… er… or not.

Sometimes I can reach back and use a non Weber musical number.

The “famous” number from Bye Bye Birdie… um, Paulie

(Paul)Tards!
I don’t know what’s wrong with these (Paul)Tards today!
(Paul)Tards!
Who can understand anything they do?
(Paul)Tards!
They are so ridiculous and immature!
I don’t see why anybody wants ’em!
Just you wait and see
(Paul)Tards!
(Paul)Tards! They are just impossible to control!
(If we kill net neutrality they will be)
(Paul)Tards! With their furry suits and their blimp and gold!
(Another Ayn Rand Atlas Shrugged reader)
Why can’t they be like WE WERE,
Deluded in every way?
What’s the matter with (Paul)Tards to–
(Paul)Tards!
What the FUCK’s wrong with these (Paul)Tards today?
(Paul)Tards!
Who could guess the they would turn out that way!
Why can’t they be like we were,
Pathetic in every way?
What’s the matter with (Paul)Tards?
What’s the matter with (Paul)Tards?
What’s the matter with (Paul)Tards today?

@ManchuCandidate: I know what I’ll be singing around the house today.

I can’t wait to hear what Mike ‘Lee’ Steele has to say about this. Something fucking retarded no doubt.

Does this mean all the Worlds of Warcraft players are about to leave their parents’ basements to launch the magic blimp again? This is so exciting!

I think the GOP true believers are waiting for their kind of murderously charismatic leader who will kill the other contenders and then tell the masses exactly what to do. If only Charles Manson was available.

@Benedick: Oh, dammit, I have to come out with it, I don’t get it, who the fuck is Mike Lee?

@Prommie: The real name of someone dear to our hearts.

@Prommie: Spike Lee’s baby brother. Played the bass player in Mo’ Better Blues.

@Dave H: Palin is having those turkey-killing funnels scaled up to human size.

Speaking of mass killing of humans, my enviro group is involved in litigation with Bayer over an insecticide that Bayer makes. One of Bayer’s claims is that the litigation is damaging its reputation. This, from the company that was part of I.G Farben during WWII — I.G. Farben being the manufacturer of Zyklon B gas — and that was headed up by a convicted war criminal after it was split off from Farben after the war. Does the German language have a word for “irony”?

@Dodgerblue: For a dollar I will go to the court hearings and shout sieg heil every time the Bayer counsel concludes a statement.

@FlyingChainSaw: I’ll be right beside you with a yellow Star of David on my chest.

@Benedick: If I knew how to say “fucking retard” in Yiddish, I could take a run at the German.

Speaking of teh crazee, Republican legislator in Virginia says that disabled children are “God’s punishment to women who have aborted their first pregnancies.”

Waiting for Talibunny outrage…crickets…crickets…

@Dodgerblue: You totally should start wearing a yarmulke to depositions.

@SanFranLefty: These people are so vile. And so ignorant.

@SanFranLefty:
Whoopsie.

Actually, it’s okay ’cause it’s “satire.”*

*whatever ever THAT is.

@Dodgerblue: Nozzies probably would have been cool with Indians because of the whole Karl May thing.

BTW, back to pike for a minute, I caught a 22 incher last time I went, which was a “little one.” Dude I was with caught 36 incher that looked like a fucking mosasaur.

@Dodgerblue: Great. I’ll bring a thermos of gin fizzes to keep us inspired.

@redmanlaw: Speaking of NDNs, thanks to a filing by Levi Johnston’s Bristol Palin’s attorneys in the child support kerfluffle, we now know that Sarah Palin’s grandson relies upon the big bad federal gumint for health care as he gets his health coverage through the Indian Health Services agency.

ADD: If Tripp is getting his health care through IHS because of the First Dude’s tribal affiliation, does this mean that all five of the Palin kids are similarly relying upon socialized federal government medicine?

@SanFranLefty:
The HC coverage is used satirically so it’s okay.

@redmanlaw: Someone else ripped off by James Cameron.
@FlyingChainSaw: Excellent. Wrap the thermos with a “Zyklon B” label to help Bayer’s lawyers get the drift.

@SanFranLefty:

Once again, correlation is not causation. But since they believe in a pocket god that shares their political beliefs and personal bias, logic is not an option.

It’s almost beneath notice- it would be, in fact, had this man not been elected to run the government.

TJ/ Meg Whitman has some pretty good ads running, doesn’t she? Very NoCal Chic.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax:

Hey now, the Palins, like all conservatards, sincerely believe in PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY, as in it’s their Gawd’s PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY to “answer their prayers” by paying out their weekly Jesus Jackpot.

And hey Jesus–no skimming off the top to help the poor, you librul, hippie fuck. PRAISE!

@SanFranLefty: First Snow Machine Operator is what we would call an “Indian” or “Native American” per his membership in an “Alaskan Native Corporation” formed by Congress to administer land claim settlements and other revenues (i.e., oil for the North Slope people). This “corporate membership” may be passed on to other blood relatives. While there is no federal blood quantum requirement for tribal or corporation membership (RML = 4/4) each tribe or corporation may set its own per own membership standards per Santa Clara Pueblo v. Martinez, 436 U.S. 49 (1978). Most tribe set theirs at 1/4, some at 1/2. The Cherokee Nation of Oklahoma used to be 1/64, but has now amended it to include anyone who is descended off a particular membership roll of Indians alive and living in that area in the late 1800s. If you were still fighting out in the hinterlands or didn’t come in for the nose count, too damn bad for your descendants. Also, the definition excludes many of those of Cherokee heritage who happen to be black.

Todd’s grandmother was 4/4, which makes him 1/4 assuming Indian + non-Indian mating and reproduction in the intervening generations. Bristol, et al, would be 1/8 and the grandson 1/16. I don’t know what the corporate membership threshold is for Todd’s people, but a disclosure form filed by Sarah at one point shows that he and the kids are all corporation members and therefore eligible for health care from the Indian Health Service, which provides free care to eligible individuals until its fiscal year budget runs out (slogan: “Don’t get sick after June”)to persons who are members of federally recognized tribes, corporation, and their chilluns and spouses. I could use IHS and did until I started making a living in newspapering, when I started getting/buying my own insurance. My family would also be eligible for IHS care.

IHS is the “payor of last resort” per federal regulations regarding care for eligible individuals, which means I could go to IHS today for care but they would charge my insurance, likewise for Medicaid/Medicare recipients. In answer to Ms. Lefty’s question, the Palin kids could get free gummit health care from IHS, the answer to the question of “do they” is unknown. The Alaska Native Medical Center is a very nice facility, btw. I had the opportunity to tour it a few years ago.

@Dodgerblue: That would be “verfickte Vollidiot” (pronounced “fer-FICK-tuh FOHL-id-ee-OHT”).

@Prommie: who the fuck is Mike Lee?

One of them is running for Utah senator. Another of them grew up counting his clones in the phone book every year.

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