Misfire

Somewhere on the ‘net, Tucker Carlson is weeping with impotent rage.

Why on earth would he do this? I don’t get it.

I have a question for all you dear people who’ve been to college here in the US. What is a Walk of Shame? It seems to be a ritual having to do with mating and/or drinking and higher education but I’m not sure what it is. I would be grateful for any info you can provide.

@Benedick: It’s when, after spending the night with someone (probably someone you just met at a party, though not always), you wake up the next morning and scurry back home with your hair/makeup/etc. mussed up and your clothes rumpled and hope to god you don’t run into a professor or anyone you know.

@mellbell:
It’s not really a walk of shame unless you get caught.

@Benedick:
Also, it’s also caused when the night before is met with the shame of the morning.

THIS IS AWSUM

Corporation Says It Will Run for Congress

With more than a twinge of irony, Murray Hill Incorporated, a liberal public relations firm, recently announced that it planned to run in the Republican primary in Maryland’s 8th Congressional District.

Here is the company’s first “campaign” ad:

@ManchuCandidate: @mellbell: Thank you both but why Walk of Shame? Is it to do with living in a dorm and having to pass people you know? In my younger days I just got on a bus. There seems to be a publicly ritualized aspect to it that I don’t understand. This comes from me reading TFLN which is one of the few sites I feel safe at right now as there won’t be anything about health care reform or gays destroying the fabric of Western society. To judge by postings there it seems that the worse the circumstances are, the more embarrassing the particulars, the better the Walk. Does one get scored? Is it a rite of passage? Is it something one talks about? Is it kept secret?

@Benedick:
it is a pathetic admission of subservience to peer pressure. poor misguided college students.

eg., I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn’t expecting an audience during my walk of shame. Puzzling.

@Benedick:
The shame is usually based on the fact that your partner is uglier, an ex, a really bad ex, and/or the “wrong” person.

I’ve recently, um, popped my walk of shame cherry about 3 weeks ago from the most awkward miserable date I’ve ever had that ended with sex (falls under “wrong” person.) Left her place feeling like a turd. Ashamed at myself and my weakness/lack of willpower/bigger brain overwhelmed by little brain etc.

Shame shame shame, indeed.

@Benedick:

a true walk of shame is when you’re walking home with smeared hair and make-up…and scurrying wearing FORMAL WEAR at 7 a.m.

@Benedick:
Sounds more like the opening line for a letter to Penthouse (they’re all real!!!)

Clearly I have much to learn of the way of the Yanqui.

@baked:
see I think this is a hetero thing. gays do not tie themselves in knots for these reasons. for example I remember many many times walking home from the Saint, more like 11am not 7am, with glistening dilated eyes completely wet from head to toe from dancing in a drug induced frenzy for the past 10 or 12 hours with my head held high.

just one more advantage to being a gay man.

however there is a corollary. how do you get a person out of the bar without having anyone see you leave with them.
just requires a little creative problem solving.

@Capt Howdy: In my (somewhat recent) experience it’s definitely an equal opportunity thing, although that may have more to do with having attended a small (<1,200) college chockablock with nerdy kids who didn't want their hookups to become gossip fodder.

@Benedick: My good friend went to grad school at Western Illinois U in Macomb, IL. Total population of the town is under 20,000, most of whom are the students. Since Thursday night was the big party night, her favorite Friday morning activity was to make some coffee, sit out on her front porch, and watch the Walk of Shame Parade. Yes, it’s a weird country.

@baked: Formal wear preferably ripped/torn/stain/missing a part, and for bonus points, missing a shoe or walking barefoot.

There’s also the inverse principle, which I guess would be called being the host/ess of shame – when your “date” leaves the next morning walking past your roommates – you’re not doing the walk per se, your guest is doing the walk and you know you’ll hear shit from your roommates.

@flippin eck: Word. I didn’t go to university in UK either so I don’t know for sure but I don’t think we have any similar public shaming rituals. Not to do with sex at any rate.

This Walk, is this done more by women or men? And if one knows going in that it’s going to happen why not plan ahead to avoid it? This is what’s so interesting at TFLN, that there should be such a boastful quality to the posts on this topic.

New favorite sorority…they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause.

Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)

I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame… it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks

Not to belabor the point but it’s fascinating.

@Capt Howdy: Ah! Our early dating dates when everything was secret!

@Benedick: In my day, it was much more a female thing because girls were supposed to pretend they weren’t having sex, while boys were proud of it. Girls also stand out more, since guys often wear the same sort of clothes to parties that they do every day, while few women leave the house on Saturday morning to do errands wearing a party dress, smeared mascara, fuck-me pumps, and a the tousled remains of an up-do hair style.

Does it have to be sex? I once lost my shirt at the Black Party, and had to walk in the freezing cold through a 7am Sunday Midtown Manhattan wearing nothing but a harness and leather jeans.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: I was going to add that too. Regardless of what came before, anytime you wake up in a strange place, hungover, inappropriately clothed, and you really, really just wish you were curled up on your own bathroom floor where you can suffer in peace–that’s a walk of shame situation, IMHO.

look what’s new in academia!

http://www.medgrowmi.com/

@Tommmcatt Say Relax:
come on admit it. you enjoyed that walk.

Really, it’s not a walk of shame, unless you’re reduced to dashing from corner to corner, naked but for a stained, torn-up rug pad while carloads of shitfaced undergrads cruise next to you in shitbox cars blowing kisses at you, tossing empty beer cans at your feet and entreating you to ‘show us your genitals!’

@Capt Howdy:

I enjoyed what came before and what came after….

TJ/ Well played, Democratic Party of Illinois , well played:

Scott Lee Cohen, a former pawnbroker who is now the Democrats’ nominee for lieutenant governor in Illinois, was arrested four-and-a-half years ago for holding a knife to the neck of his live-in girlfriend—a woman who was just found guilty of prostitution.

@Mistress Cynica: Impressive.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: Would you like us to call you Daddy? Or Sir or something?

@Benedick:

Oh, you have no idea, really.

But those days are behind me now.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: So I can come out from under the table?

@Benedick:

If you’re good.

@Benedick: That’s the thing. It’s a walk of shame because you don’t know you’re going to do it. It’s the morning following a random drunken hookup with someone you barely know and probably won’t see again. That said, I’m guessing by the comments you posted that the name is more ironic nowadays. But as Mistress Cynica said, it started out as a female phenomenon back when most people believed “good girls don’t do that.”

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ: Thank you all for your help. I have learned something here today. I would like to thank my agent without whom none of this would have been possible. And my family. And of course my great director, Archimedes Flouristan…

Wait. What?

@TJ/ Jamie Sommers /TJ:

this is another reason why this is not a gay thing. for gay men, at least back in the day, “a random drunken hookup with someone you barely know and probably won’t see again” is pretty much business as usual.
but like TCat its been a while. those were the days though.

@Capt Howdy:

Right? We used to take them to brunch after if they were really pretty so that your friends could see you with them.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax:

pix, plz ; )

@Benedick:

It’s usually secks related, but not always. I once chugged a six-pack, then smoked a joint and passed out face-first into a bowl of salsa at a party in front of dozens of people (that I knew and saw regularly–horrors).

I woke up the next day in someone else’s bed, wearing someone else’s clothes, and in a part of town I’d never been to before with no idea where I was. For weeks, people told me about all the stuff I (allegedly) said and did. It was like a Walk of Shame, never-ending.

@Original Andrew: That’s great. But everyone probably just made stuff up every time they saw you. “Oh, man, it was great when you ate the neighbor’s cat in front of the little girl. I loved the way the mom went fucking crazy and then shut up and ran when she saw the chunks dropping out of your trousers!”

@FlyingChainSaw: I used to have to drive by a popular dive bar every morning on my way to work, at 7AM, and many mornings I witnessed a version of the walk of shame, its the “ride back to you car of shame,” guys dropping girls off in the parking lot to gso they could get their car. Sometimes, they would kiss, goodbye, most times, not so much.

@Original Andrew:
the one time in my entire life that I actually dont remember the night before might qualify. it was at a party when I was in high school. I started drinking on the way to the party, it was in a fairly remote state park site, and dont remember arriving.
the next day (bright and early) I woke up near the river in the weeds and mud face down, grit in my mouth. my pants were on but unbuttoned and my underwear had dissappeared.
it was the worst feeling I can ever remember having. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED LAST NIGHT??!!
the other amazing thing is I was discussing this with an old high school friend a while back and she sent me a pic she had taken that very night.
I do not remember this picture being taken.

@Capt Howdy: I, on the other hand, remember this grad-night state-park pic quite clearly.

@nojo:
awsum. thats a great truck you are sitting in front of.
I always loved that hood design.

@Capt Howdy: For historical reference, Star Wars opened a week or two later.

@Original Andrew: There was the blacked-out Walk of Shame that sent a male friend of mine to AA: He was staying at the Mansion on Turtle Creek in Dallas, during the champagne-and-cocaine 80s heyday of the oil boom. The last thing he remembered was leaving the hotel and meeting a bunch of Eurotrash for drinks. He woke up the next morning in his own hotel room, stark naked, and the clothes he’d been wearing the night before were nowhere to be found. Best he could surmise, best on the evidence (or lack thereof) and the smirks of the night clerks, was that he’d walked through the lobby of the best hotel in Dallas stark naked in the ultimate Walk of Shame.

@nojo: Even though many of us have access to each other’s pics now via the Booke of the Face, I have to confess that I miss our Jams. Can we have another one sometime just for kicks?

@flippin eck: I’ve got wood pics to share.

@Benedick:
once seen some things can not be unseen

ps
I love thumbsnap.com

@flippin eck:

I miss the jams too.

@flippin eck: @Tommmcatt Say Relax: We can run a Jam on Saturday. Interest had, um, petered out, so I let them quietly die.

Sad Trombone sound bite  Sad sound bites

Does this work here?

@nojo:
what is this jam you talk about?

@Tommmcatt Say Relax:
people here have these sounds on things like cell phones. mostly every friday we have a team meeting where we all show the shit we have been doing. as is fairly common with technology it often does not work.

que trombones.

This is awesome!!!!  

I wish it just played the sound tho.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: Darling, step away from the keyboard. And breathe. And relax.

@Capt Howdy: what is this jam you talk about?

Behold the Awesome Majesty.

@nojo:

awsum
bookmarked for a later time.

@Benedick:
+1

@Mistress Cynica:

Champagne and cocaine, breakfast of champions.

@Capt Howdy:

Ahhh, Lil’ Howdy.

@Original Andrew:
yeah
imagine that person several hours later half dressed face down in the mud blinking into the morning sun and trying to figure out what hit me.

@nojo: Hooray! I’m totally going for Jam Album Cover number 3, suckas!

@Capt Howdy:

I can imagine lots of stuff; you were 18, right?

I’m def not one to talk, since I had an entire lost summer with my BFF Mary Jane (SUMMER OF ’94 RULES!!!).

I’m still seeing photos from that era of which I have absolutely no memory.

@Benedick:

For you, my darling…  

@Original Andrew:
more like 15 or 16
I got out of high school at 17

but dont worry. there is no legal age for imagining.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: I have to go and lie down.

“Comatose but walking still.”

Sounds like a few of us know what that’s all about.

Neil Young, “Fucking Up.”

Video starts at :20.

@Mistress Cynica: /TJ follow-up/ Oh look! In addition to being a former pawnbroker and assulting his prostitute girlfriend, our possible future lt. gov. also took steroids and raped his wife! Somewhere, Chicago Bureau just threw his bicycle into the lake.

Correction: He only tried to rape her–that’s fine then.

flippin eck: Just got back from a work trip to Michigan. The Trib was smiling at my door when I got in. As if it knew ALL ALONG.

Front-page post on said douchebag, here.

@Tommmcatt Say Relax: I felt compelled to play the “woman having sex” clips. My wife felt compelled to tell me what a jerk I am.

@Dodgerblue: *deep burp*