Die for the Man, Mortimer!

Robert Byrd may have dodged Tom Coburn’s Holy Bullet on Sunday — “What the American people ought to pray is that somebody can’t make the vote tonight” — but a caller to C-SPAN this morning feared that God may have gotten His signals crossed:

Our small teabag group here in Waycross, we got our vigil together and took Dr. Coburn’s instructions and prayed real hard that Sen. Byrd would either die or couldn’t show up at the vote the other night.

How hard did you pray because I see one of our members was missing this morning. Did it backfire on us? One of our members died? How hard did you pray senator? Did you pray hard enough?

Playing the part of Deer In Headlights is John Barrasso (R-Cheneyland), who was unable to explain why James Inhofe skipped today’s cloture vote, nor whether Inhofe deserves to live.

After Coburn Asked Americans To Pray ‘Somebody’ Misses Health Care Vote, Inhofe Skips Today’s Roll Call [ThinkProgress]
14 Comments

Probably needed to “Hike the Appalachian Trail.”

How very Christian of them to pray for someone’s death. Yet another item for Tommy and flippin’ to file under “Xtians, U R Doing it Wrong, Giving Me a Bad Name, and Pissing Off Jesus”

Wow… I just don’t know what to make of that call… was that serious or was Barrasso being punked?

Proving once again that we are ruled by monsters.

Why not ask him why jesus hasn’t struck down the demrats and made their women sterile? Why not accuse him of hating jesus for not strangling 10 demrat senators to death in the name of god? If we’re going to have fanatics, we deserve the best of class.

@FlyingChainSaw: We expected them to be taking to the hills and sniping at postal workers, playing at Red Dawn, and all sorts of utter fail, Adkisson-brigade-style shennaningans, at the prospect of a black president.

We misjudged. Their heads did indeed explode, they lost all grip with reality and sanity, but their inherent cowardice, this was something we should have given greater weight to.

Instead, the “grass roots” (unemployed basment dwellers and bitter government pensioners) have formed all sorts of laughable groups of overweight imbeciles, and marched about in various places, imagining themselves Revolutionary War Patriots, the religious whackjobs have declared holy christian Jihad, which seems to consist of praying to Jeebus to kill the nazi-socialist-commie-liberals for them, so much for any prospect of any threat from Christian Soldiers marching anywhere, and the GOPers are still, really, lost in the wilderness, wondering still whether to throw in fully with the paultard-teabagger-Palin marching morons, meanwhile just frothing and fulminating impotently, spouting one day Limbaugh rhetoric, one day christ-tard rhetoric, one day Palinist rhetoric, all of it, every word out of all of them, just incoherent angry ramblings and a parade of ludicrous, insane predictions of the doom the black president will bring down on us all.

Really, its all good, I think. The tea-readings and wishful dreams of a 2010 anti-democrat backlash, well, its a little soon for that, things never really shape out till you see what frothing loons they actually nominate, thats when people actually start to think, do I want to put this maniac in congress?

@Promnight: We hoped they’d be an adversary worth killing, shrieking neonazi monsters who’d hurl themselves at federal building hugging trash bags filled with C4 in the name of jesus, of which the surviving conspirators would face firing squads; and we’d be able to buy raffles tickets to take a chance on having the honor of taking a nice, slow piss on the faces of the jesufascists and taunt their souls before they make their way to hell. Instead, they babble like brain-damaged squirrels without the utility of propagating trees. Really, assholes, if you’re so convinced of the righteousness of your convictions, you’ll either be ready to stick a gun in your mouths and go to fucking jesus or attack a satanic goverment and be ready to face god’s judgment in being made accountable on his earth. Please don’t be pathetic air-wasting bafoons. Chose, assholes, and fucking die.

oh, come on. This is not real. Who calls into C-SPAN (as opposed to looking this shit up on the Internet) to ask whether a sitting senator is dead while crying about his “teabag group” in Whitecross, Georgia accidentally killing the wrong senator with his prayers?

@Promnight: @FlyingChainSaw:

Oh my god that is the funniest shit I’ve read in years. You guys should go on the rod, you know that? Jesus lord , funny and true.

Oh, and Nojo? Just FYI, the new edit thingie doesn’t work on the iPhone. Just sayin’

You sure about that? Cuz I’m finger-stabbing your comment right now.

Oh right, make an example of me,why don’t you?

@Tommmcatt is hunkered down in the trenches: So it works, but it opens up a separate iPhone page. Once you’ve saved your edit, you have to back-arrow the page to return.

@Jamie Sommers: Either it’s real and hilarious, or a punk and hilarious. Win-win!

@SanFranLefty: My ire was assuaged a bit when that douchenozzle Coburn was called out on the floor by my senator (no, not the one appointed by Blago and offering up embarrassing poetic musings on the floor). Go Dick!

@nojo:
you would think it has to be a punk.
on the other hand I believe Waycross is in Georgia.

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