Oy Vey…
The problem: Hanukkah songs are all uniformly lame, unlike Christmas songs which are, without exception, awesome.
The solution? Choose one from the following list:
A) Commission Southpark co-creator and Jew Matt Stone to pen a handful of humorously offbeat additions to the seasonal canon.
B) Arrange a Hanukkah themed musical collaboration between ex-Dire Straits guitarst Mark Knopfler (Jewish father) and Jewish singer songwriter Janis Ian.
C) Have ultra-conservative Utah Senator and devout Mormon song-smith Orrin Hatch pen a few ditties in honor of the Festival of Lights.
You know what’s coming next without me even having to tell you, don’t you? That’s right: If you picked C… congratulations.
Sorry my Jewish friends, but this Hanukkah thing of yours just got a teensy bit lamer.
Actually, I heard an arrangement of ‘Jerusalem of Gold’ I thought was well orchestrated and engaging.
Fuck Orrin Hatch …
it always amuses me that jew irving berlin wrote “white christmas”
and doesn’t jew barbra sreisand and jew neil diamond sing it beautifully?
the definative chanukah song:
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: I have birthright citizenship in Cascadia, so I think I’m good.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @nojo: Only the sane parts... like the West coast, New England (minus the Bruins and…
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: So, can you guys annex us now?
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! PP is done. 51st state, my ass.
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @FlyingChainSaw: No, but my government was.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @nojo: Were you kidnapped?
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @FlyingChainSaw: I’ve spent the past five weeks looking like Astronaut Dave going through the…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! NOJO - HOW COME WE'RE NOT COVERING KRASNOV?
NOJO • The Reckoning Four years later: Uhhh, how’d that work out?
JNOV • Hanging by a Thread @nojo: yeah. I had a feeling you’d say that.