You Won’t Like Them When They’re Angry

In our cribbed report from Sarah Palin’s first book-signing, we omitted a curious detail:

4:40 p.m. | Several hundred more people waited outside in the misty rain. They didn’t get to the Barnes & Noble Booksellers early enough to get one of the wrist bands. But they hoped that Palin might show some pity on them by saying a few words or extending her three-hour signing time.

Since there was no follow-up — did she extend her hours? — we let it slide. But it turns out that the Golden Ticket orange wristband, “which would allow them a few moments with Palin,” doesn’t guarantee you shit:

Went to the book signing in Noblesville, IN. Waited three hours in the cold to get a wristband to reserve my spot at the book signing tonight. We were told she would sign book for the first 1000 people. Not so. The event ended promptly at 9:00pm, though there were still at least 150 people left. Wasted my day, wasted money on a babysitter, and wasted my money on this book.

Lest you think that unkind comment from Talibunny’s Facebook page is cherry-picking, the terrible elitists at Rumproast provide a video from the chaotic scene. Although they don’t roll Palin’s bus, they do chant “sign our books” and complain about “quittin’ on the job” before being crushed by the billboard-sized Smilin’ Sarah.

Video of Angry Wingnuts Booing Sarah Palin, Calling Her a “Quitter” & Chanting “Sign Our Books” [Rumproast, via Washington Independent]

sign our books – sign our books – attica – attica – attica

You mean she quit in the middle? Well blow me down. I did not see that coming.

What a fucking bus for a failed governor and VP candidate. I mean, I saw Buddy Rich’s bus during his last tour and it was standard rolling stock for that class of equipment. Not even a sign in the window.

Ha ha! I’ve been down all day but listening to those people booing Palin really brightened my spirits.


When I saw Obama her in Santa Fe in Feb 2008, he made sure to go out and speak with the 2000 people who could not get into the event and stood in the cold for about four hours to hear him on loudspeakers.

@redmanlaw: I was thinking of Springsteen, but that’s even better.

Could those people be any more infantile? Yeesh. T

This is the opposition, folks.

@redmanlaw: @nojo: Good Lord, that’s what you do, for Christ’s sake. Comes with the territory. What an amateur. What a maroon.

When Debbie Reynolds was in a revival of Irene at the Minskoff she went out to the lobby after ever performance to sign programs for fans. She was no spring chicken and let me tell you, prancing about a stage for two hours changing costumes 19 times a show is fucking exhausting. And then twice on Weds and Sats. But that’s the job. (Hmm. I do seem to go straight to the world of musical comedy for backup. Hmm. Wonder what that means?)

I also wonder who represents her. My secret wish is that it’s William Morris because it was recently bought out by Ari Emanuel’s company. So she’d be represented by Rahm Emanuel’s brother. But that would be too much to hope for.

@Benedick: Her literary agent is “high-powered Washington attorney Robert Barnett,” according to the Daily Tina Beast.

Rahm Emanuel’s brother

that might explain a lot.

@nojo: Hmm. Not a show-biz powerhouse. Interesting. In a boring kind of way. I wonder if she got him on commission or if he’s billing by the hour.

@Capt Howdy: He’s terrifying. They should send him to Afganistan. The Taliban would offer up Osama to get him to leave.

@Benedick: That might also work if we send Palin there.

After 8 hours in the cold and rain with my wife and 10 month old baby, I was shocked to watch Sarah get on a bus and leave without signing books for at least 400 people.

Are you fucking kidding me? A 10-month-old outside for 8 hours in November? What utterly moronic gits! The kid will probably get mumps now from its unvaccinated older siblings, because you know these are the same people who think immunizations cause autism (as opposed to what would clearly be genetics, in this case).

@Benedick: Maroon–love it! I’ve only ever heard Bugs Bunny say it til now.

@Jamie Sommers: Not as fast as Ari. He is perhaps the most frightening man in America. And brilliant.

@flippin eck: Gits? Love it. Who says gits? What next? Bints?

I love maroons, too. Those scripts were heaven. But I think I’ve seen one of our manly men use it, prom or FCS or DB. Not noje – for obvious reasons.

Oh, fuck me. Check out the demented fucktards who are complaining about the Talibunny stiffing them the autograph they worked so hard, sniff, for, for standing hours and hours in the rain and cold and hahahahaha, stupid fucks, you actually think the Talibunny gives a flying fuck, cares whether you live or die as long as you crowd around the bus begging for her to shit on your cock-eyed, toothless faces? Hahahahahahaha.

Hey, where is her book tour going? Maybe we can sell Talibunny T-shirts at the events and get on TV!

@FlyingChainSaw: Plan to be in Rochester on Saturday?

But here’s the fun part: Now that there’s no guarantee whatsoever that even a wristband will get you in, what does this mean for crowd control at future stops? Will we see fights breaking out in line? Who will be crushed in the rush? Local TV will be all over this from here on out.

@flippin eck: The non-vaccine crowd in Santa Fe are mostly hippie/new age types who one can imagine giving the poor Guatemalan stocker at Whole Foods a hard time over whether the produce is organic enough but have no qualms over sending their little dirty bombs of germs to school to get the other kids sick.

@nojo: According to the posts over at, the band’s wristband/assigned place in line for floor admission worked great except at venues where local yokels would use their own system and fuck it all up, which is what I understand happened at the Rose Bowl show.

@redmanlaw: Hippies, yech. I preferred the commies.

@nojo: FOX headline: “Overflow event at Palin book signing”. MSNBC headline: “Going Vogue?”

@nojo: I’d love to but unfortunately I am stuck on the north shore of Sicily. Send Sarah my regrets.

This will probably reduce the size of the crowds by about 15 percent right away and make for a few more nasty episodes before her handlers figure out that people get mad when they are lied to – ungrateful assholes that don’t know all the Sarah does for them just by being Her! Then, they’ll react by only giving out 22 wristbands and once that hits the Web, ballgame. The only crowds left will be the neonazis who will beg her to bear their kids to raise a white supremest army, get into fights with her security people and finally be filmed curb stomping random brown-people who wandered into the churning mayhem of hate and rage that is a Talibunny event.

She oughtta sue her damn ghostwriter, good FSM.

My Freshman Comp TA–whose acidic criticism almost brought several of us to tears–would rip her a new asshole.

How in the world did this abomination even get past a book editor?

@Original Andrew: These kinds of books aren’t edited. They’re acquired, copy edited and typeset.

@FlyingChainSaw: Most politicians are narcissistic sociopaths, to some degree, at least. But most of them understand that its hard work to be a public figure. I worked for a congressman I would put way above average in human integrity and honesty, but the thing about him that stood out, was that 6 and 7 days a week, he was up at 6 to attend a 7 AM breakfast event, went off to a mid-morning meeting with some group then off to a lunch event, then off to the office for 3 hours, then off to a dinner event, and constantly, constantly, talking to people and shaking hands, all day, every day, from 7 am to 10 at night. I avoided being his body man strenuously, I could not do it.

This fucking prima donna cunt, she just doesn’t have it in her, to be a politician. This is just the first sign, and what, 3 days into her tour?

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