Palin 101

84fe7af14bb1580ee528828bf865d4a2ee8821c02TBogg offers the best summation I’ve seen so far:

But somewhere along the line (I’m guessing when her Alaska Trust Fund only pulled in about $125,000 of the $500,000 that they were seeking  for her mounting legal bills) she decided to cut bait and make a dash for the cash sooner rather than later. As we move farther away from the election and more little tidbits come trickling out of the McCain campaign, time is not going to be her friend.

Sarah Palin isn’t smart in what we might call conventional ways, but she has grifter smarts and knows that she can make a better living working the wingnut welfare circuit preaching to the already converted than she can in politics. She’ll never be President; you know it and she knows it. Everyone should know it. But there are a lot of rubes out there who think she’s got a shot and they’re just dumb enough to pay good money thinking it will happen. That is what she’s counting on.

And the following video is one of the most sphincter-tightening I’ve ever seen (watch AC’s face, for one thing):

Like Sarah, Meg Stapleton just spouts words in the hope that some of them resolve into something intelligible.

UPDATE:  Palin and her attorney have pointed out that FBI sez no investigation, but they have not mentioned the possibility of an investigation by the state:

Update: This just in my inbox, from a source connected sometimes to CNN:

“Here’s a quote I got from law enforcement here in Alaska yesterday afternoon regarding Palin “a criminal indictment is pending authorization.”


I’m sorry, Steve Miller
This heres a story about Talibunny and the First Dude
Two Snow Grifters with nothin better to do
Than sit around the house, kill moose, and watch the tube
And here is what happened when they decided to cut loose

They hunkered down in, ooh, old Wassila
That’s where they ran their Alaskan kingdom
The First Dude got busted while building his castle
Talibunny took the money and run

Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run

Monegan was the commissioner
Up in Alaska
You know he knows just exactly what the facts is
He got fired to let those two play justice
He made his livin off of big oil taxes

Talibunny, whoa, whoa, she quit for pay
The First Dude caught up to her the very next day
They got the money, hey
You know they’ll run away
They’ll try to appear on Fox and theyre still grifting today
Singin go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run X8

@Dodgerblue: Even if you hate Steve Miller, you have to admire Manchu’s work.

@ManchuCandidate: I’ve reworked the words to that song to be about my deceased dog. I call it “Take the Chewbone and Run.”

I don’t know who Steve Miller is and I have no clue what this song is. Sorry, manchu.

@ManchuCandidate: I get so excited when it’s a song even I recognize. My brother played the hell out of that album.


I love Steve Miller! That was great!

@Mistress Cynica:

It was a pretty good album, for it’s day.

all: Put me down for “hell no” on Steve Miller. Partially because is was standard issue in the dorms (along with Dave Matthews) at Stanford.

My sophomore year ‘mates were Led Zeppelin fans. They were also refugees from a dehoused frat. That was a long year. (This may have been subconscious, but deep down, I know I fucking enjoyed having my alarm blast at 0215 for my wake-up call every week, just before my 3-6am shift at the radio station.)

Stand By For NEWS!

News… On The March!

DEVELOPING HARDISH: Sen. Kristen Gillibrand getting primaried by Rep. Carolyn Maloney. (Not terribly exciting, I know, but something to file away for next year.)

@chicago bureau: Couple of random things. Gillibrand went to my law school. So did porn hound Judge Alex Kozinski. And the lawyer who just got appointed to administer the Jackson estate.

I like Steve Miller! Except for “Abracadabra” – that song was shit.

“Grifter smarts.” I think that’s the first time I’ve heard something like that applied to Palin. I’m not sure the analogy works but maybe that ‘s because I’ve never been taken in by her persona.

Anderson Cooper is a WGIWF.

And you are required by law to love “Take The Money and Run”. You may not like it, but there it is.

@Dodgerblue: Man, Kozinski sure got off easy (so to speak) with the little slap on the wrist (so to speak) from the judicial ethics committee.

@Tommmcatt Floats: I loved how he said “I know nothing about Sport” in that haughty way. I was so proud of my people.

I cannot take the rhymes on that song.

@Benedick: That was the best part. “I don’t know who the ball is and who’s the hoop.” Priceless.

I think she completely lost him when she said something about passing the ball and “going around the block.” He probably thought she was talking about taking a walk around a city block instead of evading a blocking defense.

SanFranLefty: Oh baby — the Newsom Hair Helmet. Lovely.

@chicago bureau: Oooh, it’s already showing up, excellent! Nice job identifying whose hair it is. I felt like I needed a change from good ol’ Nancy.

@Benedick: It’s very simple: a point guard dribbles down the court, passes the ball, and then leaves the arena.

@nojo: By ‘dribbles’ you mean? And who is the court? And what is the ball?

@ManchuCandidate: Just to be clear, not your rhymes. I mean Steve Maxwell’s rhymes. Whatever his name is.

Notes from a Tea Party:

At the event in Los Angeles, right-wing former Saturday Night Live actress Victoria Jackson — who has previously called Barack Obama a Muslim and a communist — called for the President’s impeachment, “There, I said it,” and did a handstand dedicated to our men and women in uniform. As Chris Erskine of the Los Angeles Times writes: “But Victoria Jackson held that handstand for, like, almost a minute — strong and proud. In my book, that’s worth 10 bucks alone.”

BREAKING. Nabisco is at Cafe Prom today. There may be photos at some point.

@blogenfreude: I remember her SNL bit on the “Constipitution.” See she wasn’t just playing dumb.

@blogenfreude: Victoria Jackson has been a “former Saturday Night Live actress” almost three times as long as she was a Saturday Night Live actress. Which doesn’t say much for her post-SNL career.

For comparison, try “Jurassic Park director” Steven Spielberg.

I’d rather get a lap dance from Gilbert Gottfried for that kind of money.

@homofascist: There’s a beautiful pic of a man on his bow over in the sandbox. Unfortunately the lack of flash on this phone means our tandem shot is mildly ghoulish. Suffice it to say the deli is superb, Prom and familia Prom are wonderful hosts and now good IRL friends, and the food and convo were.beyond memorable.

Stinque East represents!

@Nabisco say Relax: Nabisco and familia Nabisco are the bestest, we had a great time, to be repeated soon.

@Tommmcatt Floats:
tommycatt, are you referring to woody’s first movie?
just when i thought i couldn’t love ya more……

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