Now that they’ve definitively proved that thousands of the 59 million people who voted against Barack Obama five months ago still oppose him now, don’t think the Nut Factory isn’t lacking for raw material. Let’s catch up with some of the other memes still popping veins at WorldNetDaily:

1. Hawaii’s Fake Baby Mill.

Like Hillary knocking off Vince Foster, the forged birth certificate never goes away. Unlike Hillary knocking off Vince Foster, it’s not true.

2. The Keynes Mutiny.

Did somebody at Think Progress infiltrate WND when we weren’t looking? Because this isn’t necessarily the hard-luck story we’d highlight:

“We’re headed toward socialism, and socialism is anathema to everything this country’s ever stood for,” said Fritz Breland, a self-employed yacht broker from Boynton Beach. “I’m essentially unemployed because no one’s buying.”

If Mr. Breland would send us his address, we’d be happy to treat him to a bilge pump from Amazon.

3. Can’t we forget Timothy McVeigh already?

Dude only blew up one building, 50 percent fewer than Osama. And for this the Feds have to keep tabs on militias?

4. Fine. Two can play that game.

Starting today, Dave Gaubatz “plans to visit a mosque in each state in 50 days to assess their threat to the nation’s security”:

Gaubatz said he will declare his intentions at each of the pre-selected mosques in a professional manner, hand the leaders his card and confront them on any violent material he observes or on any information they distribute that advocates an Islamic state in the U.S.

This is actually a fallback position, after his plan to “systematically classify every known mosque in the U.S. in a rigorous, scientific fashion” fell through for lack of funding. Our own plan to show up at the door of every church in America and confront them on holy cannibalism is in development.

5. Mein Führer! I can march!

Remember Barry’s rousing call to national service last year? They do:

“Hitler knew that if you control the youth, you control the future. I wrote about him in The Threats to Homeschooling: From Hitler to the NEA. As I noted in that article, Hitler said: ‘The Youth of today is ever the people of tomorrow. For this reason we have set before ourselves the task of innoculating our youth with the spirit of this community of the people at a very early age, at an age when human beings are still unperverted and therefore unspoiled.'”

And in case you miss the point, the story includes a video of last year’s Obama Youth Brigade, some kids who dressed up in fatigues, lined up in formation, and cited their quite wholesome aspirations.

Still missing the point? The kids are black.


I have to go lie down.

And yes, that is grammatically correct, Miss Cyniething.

T/J. From the department of ‘Let’s Kick Kittens and Puppies’: after many years I re-saw To Kill A Mockingbird. My God but that is one putrid movie! I was shocked. Till we started laughing at it. Then it got marginally better. That script! Jesus! But everything is terrible. The children are terrible. The cinematography is ludicrous. The sets are terrible. Mr. Peck is so boring you think you’re at a remedial class on how to use Windows Vista. I loved the book when I read it but I was all of 12. So I better not tempt fate by reading it again. Just thought I’d share. Hopefully many of you will be offended and want to write vituperative posts about Limeys and/or musical theatre. And if the foregoing wasn’t quite enough to get your blood boiling let me say this about the South:

It’s not interesting. There is nothing about the South that is interesting. It’s only interesting to southerners. I don’t care about grits or hog-calling or anyone’s ‘eccentric’ grandma. Faulkner is unreadable. And Eudora Welty can kiss my ass.

There. Now. Let me have it. Call me an asshole. Anything. Anything is better than reading about teabaggers. I’d rather read about Sport on Ice. I am sick of these people and wish them nothing but sunshine and rainbows in some place far, far away.

Awwww, poor Fritzie. Being a middle man must be tough.

Benedick: Check yourself, honey. That movie makes people want to go up to a lawyer and offer a hug. Stinque has a number of lawyers who know how to make you feel pain. Watch your back. Trust.

Back on-topic: that DHS / militia report should be taken out back and shot — if only because it gave Boehner an opportunity to open his sorry piehole and say something stupid again.

He spake thusly: “To characterize men and women returning home after defending our country as potential terrorists is offensive and unacceptable.”

No it isn’t. Particularly when it happens to be true in rare cases — the caveat that appeared in the report itself, if I remember right.

Seriously — Republicans have to take up reading stuff that isn’t written by a radio host. And in a damned hurry.

@chicago bureau: Soft TJ/Commonwealth mailroom seized up today with the report of “suspicious powder”. Results? Tea bags….

(all orthographicalistic misteaks and erars are froom teh original, Serolf)

Description of Incident: Capital Police reported a suspicious envelope was found in the Senate Mail Room B-54 in the Main Capital Building. The envelope was reported to contained an unknow powdery substance. The worker in the mail room identified it as suspicious and put it in a sealed plastic bag. Capital Police Intellegince and Fire Safety was dispatched to the room. Air units in the building were turned off. No contamination was found in the air. The envelope was transfered to the mail facility Tech Park for further investigation. Preliminary investigation believes the substance to be a tea bag. There was no evacuations of the building and everyone is back to work. The SEOC will follow up when testing of the substance is complete.

@Benedick: OMG, sir, couldn’t you just content yourself with drooling over Gregory Peck in his prime? I just reread the book a year ago or so and I thought it held up well for an adult reader–there’s a lot of narrative and dialog dedicated to the dynamics among the neighbors and “town folk” that totally went over my head as a young ‘un. However, I wouldn’t advise you try rereading it until after you go play in the sunshine with your doxies for a while, since you seem to be in total philistine mode at the moment.

@flippin eck: I loved the book, but it was ruined for me by an ex with a kitteh named “Scout”. She (the ex) went through that conversion from b) to 3) that Serolf Divad spoke of yesterday, and the kitteh was kind of squirrely as well.

@Benedick: There, there, dear. Doggies. Sunshine. Flowers. Spring. Musical theatre. Happy thoughts.

@Nabisco: My dad (who, of any celebrity that comes to mind, most closely resembles Gregory Peck in that movie) and I were on separate occasions given the respective nicknames “Atticus” and “Scout,” and there’s an old photo where he and I are curled up on a bench in much the same pose as this. It’s corny, but I relate to the story on a personal level.

@mellbell: I understand. By comparison, we joke with my dad that sometimes he reminded us of Ed Harris’ character in Apollo 13, and sometimes this guy.


Sure, piss on The Wizard of Oz next.

We have to have a drink sometime; the conversation would be legendary.

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