Bringing The Stupid

Found this over at John Cole’s place:

And where the fuck is Khazakistan?

BONUS: Did you know Bachmann’s husband can cure teh gay?


And where the fuck is Khazakistan?

Right next to Carjackistan?

I don’t have sound on this computer but it is clear the Bachfuck is trying to pull a Talibunny with those glasses.

@HillRat: Next door to Wackistan, where they breed wingnuts.

@HillRat: Right next to Carjackistan?

Which sits just above Floorjackistan.

Try the veal!

I actually laughed out loud at the looks Geithner and Bernacke gave her when she kept asking what provision of the Constitution authorized them to do what they did and whether they would denounce the whatzahoozits in Karnacistan’s currency (or something. geez that accent is ridiculous).

I’m also curious if she let got her last shipment of Botox from Canuckistan and that’s why she’s got that nasty-ass duckbill lip going on, or if it’s from sneaking down to Texas to suck face with Dubya again.

That hearing was in Jackoffistan.

She can really bring teh stoopid…. Almost felt sorry for Timmy and Ben.

It’s just as good the second time around! This time I watched it w/o sound.
Timmy’s got this adorable look on his face, all titled head and wrinkled brow like a puppeh sincerely trying to dicipher what the person barking at him is saying.
Benji, on the other hand, is almost Scalia-esque in his obvious disdain at having to respond to the unintelligble nonsense eminating from across the room.

@Jamie Sommers: Benji was thinking about Plato on the wisdom of having philosopher-kings.

So, repeatedly asking “where in the constitution does your power come from” is roughly equivalent to waving a flag over your head, saying, “I don’t understand how this system of government works,” right? I mean, Timmie gets his power from congress, via the purse strings. That’s all the more the constitution has to say on the matter. Do I have this correct? (I don’t fully understand how this system of government works, but I’m also not an elected rep from Crazistan, who should know.)

This is such a delightful piece of wingnuttery. It’s the wingnuttiest!

@Jamie Sommers: Geithner’s approval ratings in Nabiscastan went through the roof with this.

@FlyingChainSaw: Even better with the sound. I thought “this is what Talibunny will sound like after four years of media prep; fluent in Idiot”.

@flippin eck: And the way she suggestively holds the mike stem between her fingers suggests a cabaret singer, in Des Moines.

@IanJ: I’m glad this guy spent all those years with TurboTax. He’s used to repeated prompts with useless questions based on seemingly random crap that has nothing to do with reality.

Article I, Section 8. What do I win?

@Nabisco: Lemme find the laptop. Bachfuck is a treasure. The wingnuttiest! hehehe Sounds like advertiser speak! Add raisins and milk and it’s a meal!

@nojo: A night with Michelle. Second prize is two nights.

It’s a good thing her husband can cure teh gay, ‘cuz I bet Michelle herself has caused a lot of ghey in her time. Imagine sex with that pair of choppers and those crazy eyes and you’ll see what I mean.

Better yet, imagine ORAL sex with them. Yeesh, that makes me want to turn straight just so I can go gay again and be absolutely sure it will never happen to me, ever, world-without-end-amen.

@Tommmcatt the Wet Sprocket:

Thanks for that; now I won’t sleep soundly for a week.

@Tommmcatt the Wet Sprocket: ewwwww! ewww, ewwww, ewwwww! Shower, mind bleach, stat!

@Tommmcatt the Wet Sprocket: Of course, thanks to flippin eck‘s brilliant and appropriate description of a “duck bill,” I would imagine said noises of oral sex would involve honking and quacking.

@Tommmcatt the Wet Sprocket: Shit, and here I was thinking that the only kind of hate-sex I would even have with her would have to be oral. Oh, yes, she would gnaw you raw with those rodent-like choppers, but the saving grace would be knowing she is enjoying it way less than you are.

@Tommmcatt the Wet Sprocket: I am seriously curious here, what sounds do you envision her making? The most likely scenario I envision is that she actually thinks she is quite the fuck-meister, and knows how to drive a man wild, and that she is deluded about this as she is about every other aspect of her opinion of herself. I could see her trying to imitate the snatches of porn she has seen, histrionic wailing and moaning and such, in a bad imitation of a woman imitating someone’s depraved idea of a woman in the throes of passion, and she will be doing a very bad, cartoon-like imitation of those bad cartoon-like imitations of the real thing.

The other possibility is that she really is, in her personal life, a jebuser, and although she is enjoying the sex in a religiously approved way, she really is just kinda laying there and being just awful in every way, but cheerful about it. The fundies cheerfulness is creepier than their anger, you have to spend time among them and see them happy, i ts wierder than seeing them angry.

@Promnight: You ever have a fish partially swallow your hook? She would produce something akin to the sound fish make when you try to free the hook from a their gullets.


I think it would sound like the soundtrack to a zombie movie…moaning, wet, wet sounds, and…crunching….

There’s lots of “stans” in this area. The prevailing climate is too arid to produce tumbleweeds. And, it seems unlikely that the two countries which border one another on each side, BackPakistan and Prozakistan are losing favor with disaffected youth as rapidly as they had been before the Inland Seas proposal took root. Originally formulated half in jest by the “shrink-tank”, the policy-making body composed primarily of former therapists, this plan suggested that current stalemates over fossil-based fuels be dealt with by energy experts. This would free them up to use their resources to leapfrog ahead. Since we’re all aware that these problems are bound to be solved, it makes sense for the shrinks to move on, cheered by scientists’ assurances that the logistics are positive.

At stake? The future of an entire region, in fact, the very one in which an entire inland ocean (the Caspian Sea) nearly dried up. The Jung crowd’s
synthesis: form an enormous new lake by diverting water from the Urals and Himalayas. Lake Baikal has been considered as a source (the world’s
deepest freshwater lake, it contains fully one fifth of the global fresh water supply.) Regrettably, the current technology is inadequate to do this affordably.

Infrastructure would be re-directed toward massive resort development, resulting in a kind of regional Club Med with broad demographic appeal. Economies would undergo a paradigm shift worldwide. Pleasure would be the new driving principle, replacing technology and manufacturing.

Don’t wait for it to happen; be a part of it. A new nation is coming…
Pestorkistan. (with apologies to FCS)



Nah, I was thinking more along the lines of a Dirty Sanchez.

Perhaps even the legendary Chili Dog or Cleveland Steamer…

@pinkoscum: OHHH, if you are going that way, this is either the “bucking bronco” or the “donkey punch.”

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