Live from Wasilla, It’s Hillbilly Heroin!

You’ll be relieved to know that Sarah Palin does not pal around with meth dealers.

No, not-yet-in-law Sherry Johnston was nailed for distributing Limbaugh-endorsed Oxycontin, first identified in 2001 as “Hillbilly Heroin” for its initial popularity in Appalachia.

Levi’s mom won’t be arraigned until January 6. Her new grandson is expected to drop sometime Saturday.

Johnston’s arrest was oxycontin-related [ADN]

Whew. At least Levi’s mom is “respectable.” Better than being a meth cook.

Boy, are the Palins proud that their oldest knocked up girl is marrying into a clan of Oxy dealers/hockey players which is probably the Wasilla equivalent of marrying into a “good” wealthy family of Ivy League Grads in the lower 48.

Yay equivalency!!!!

A naive question: where do they get this stuff? How many pharmacies could there be in Wasilla?

@Dodgerblue: Remember that brand new Walmart they talked about?

Well this is just a little Peyton Place and they’re all Harper Valley hypocrites.

@Original Andrew: I lurv that song, and have no doubt Nojo grew up with it as well.

I was looking for Hillbilly Junk by Paul Westerberg, but it ain’t on the tubez:

One, two, three
Take another pill, baby
Three, five, six,
Oh, there’s whores up in them sticks

Canada, like the rest of the U.S. northern border states? The crab boats on Deadliest Catch?

Oooh, I have an idea. Levi can go work on a crab boat to make money to support the baby Igloo Crankshaft and the baby mama Bris.

TJ/ RIP, Dock Ellis.

Greatest, or at least most infamous, no-no in major league baseball.

ADD: My gravatar will shape-shift in honor of the man.

@Original Andrew: I don’t like modern country, but that’s one of my all time fave songs.

What’s the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull?

@Original Andrew: oooh, love it, and there was a link to a video of my other fave, Ode to Billy Joe.

TJ. Wait a fucking minute. This just in from TPM. Taxpayers need to bail out fucking hedge funds now?

The Fed has set up something called the TALF, the Term Asset-backed Securities Loan Facility, which will offer “low-cost three-year funding to any US company investing in securitized consumer loans” including hedge funds.

Says the Financial Times (reg.req.), “Since the credit crisis erupted, hedge funds have complained that they cannot get the leverage they need to arbitrage away excessive spreads and meet high hurdle rates of return.”

@Dodgerblue: Hedge funds? I don’t fucking think so. Use your bonuses, assholes. Or is this something that Czar Paulson gets to decide without have to listen or answer to anyone?
Krugman’s recent column was so on point about Wall Street.

@Mistress Cynica: @Dodgerblue: It is truly time for someone up there to really say, “enough.” Even though there’s one president at a time, Obama, you need to start taking over the role at least in appearance now because W is on autopilot right now after doing 90-proof whiskey shots every night out of Laura’s chesticles. In theory, O, you’re not the prez, but in reality, you are. Wall Street mofos never never never ever learn their lessons. The guvmint makes an example out of one of them and the rest of them get off scot-free to go for the next scheme until it crashes and burns and screws us all in the ass once again without the benefit of lubrication.

The circle must be broken, by and by, lord, by and by.

I’m looking forward to my guv-mint bailout when Mr. SFL and I both lose our jobs in February or March, the rate things are going.

@SanFranLefty: Is Mr. SFL affected by the Gov’s “furlough” plan?

Yes, if he’s lucky he’ll be affected by the “furlough” plan that results in a 10% pay cut/24 days a year of unpaid leave. More likely, he is going to be affected by the “layoff notices are going to the 20% of state employees most recently hired/Fuck You Unions” plan.

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