A Star is Porn

Whoa. Wait. I’ve seen a good deal of amateur porn on Red Tube and that other website — forgot the name. Anyway, the stuff I saw didn’t seem to be the work of out-of-their-skull druggies but rather couples that kind of gave a shit about each other. The quality was poor, but the emotions seemed real. That gonzo shit is completely emotionless and full of really bad fake boobs and skinny twats.

Rather than see hair come back, which is fine, I’d rather see something other than let’s see all the places I can shove my dick before I come on your face. But I’m just a chick, and I guess we’re not the main audience for that gonzo crap.

/end rant

$100+ cover Strip Clubs?

Definitely a higher class of perv than I can be.

@ManchuCandidate: Even Scores, which is fairly low rent, is $50 during the week and more on weekends. Or it was seven years ago the last time I was there. Who the fuck knows what it costs now.

@JNOV: I’ve yet to figure out who the audience is for Gonzo porn.

@bart_calendar:
the GOP?

@baked: I suspect they go for Max Hardcore.

Rome Girl, when you were proofreading this what exactly did you mean when you left “no chest20hair gay porn” in the first paragraph of the response to the second question?

Is this some Freudian fetish thing I should know about?

@bart_calendar:
Definitely a different pricing structure to what I’m used to. Not many clubs in Canada City charge cover even the top end ones. But they do stiff you on drinks, food and the VIP lounge which is to be expected.

Ass, grass or gas, no one rides for free.

Of course, it helped that I dated/was a sugar daddy a stripper for three months till she decided to head for Miami (she wanted me to come with her, but I wasn’t going there.)

@ManchuCandidate: Yeah, the montreal strip clubs I used to go to always seemed like a bargain.

The high end clubs do tend to be an overall better value, in that you are not surrounded by total riff raff/college kids and the girls tend to be much, much better looking and considerably less desperate than the typical New Jersey strip club, which are also typically free to get into.

At the high end clubs you often have recent Penthouse Pets and Playboy Bunnies stripping, which is not, probably, what you are getting in Canada City.

@bart_calendar:
It seems where I live there is a hierarchy of clubs. Depends on your tastes. Rule of thumb is how the bouncers dress. If they look like Hells Angels (and they usually are) then you’re not at a top end club.

@ManchuCandidate:
I need more sleep so I can make more sense.

I should have prefaced my whole dated a stripper comment with the “I sort of understand the economics of a peeler bar because I dated a… and she gave a lesson in economics from a stripper’s point of view.”

@ManchuCandidate: You realize that dating a stripper makes you my hero, right?

@bart_calendar:
Every guy has a place where his mojo works. For me, it’s bachelor parties at strip clubs (the only time I go to them.)

First time this happened was at friend’s BP at a club in SoCal. My friends had to pull my new found friend off me (I didn’t want to go either) when it was time to leave (they would have left me there but I was driving the rental car and the only one sober.)

Weirdest moment was at another friend’s BP in Toronto. I was mobbed by strippers (none of whom I knew) while my friends (including the groom) watched in stunned surprise. Usually, I’m the one ignored.

I will say that in my experience, dating a stripper has more drama than a usual relationship. Also I noticed she liked gifts. A lot.

@ManchuCandidate: You needn’t reply but I am curious, How can you feel certain you won’t contract an STD? some of which are deadly?

@bart_calendar: And Nojo, who actually formats this for posting, was asleep at the copy desk.

(Since “%20” is a space in certain geek dialects, I’m suspecting a Transmission Error. Which two people overlooked.)

I must quibble in re bear porn and production values — yeah, some of it has very low low values, but Raging Stallion — not really “bear” in a larger-guy sense, but full of very hairy musclebears are magnifique.

@lynnlightfoot:
Just came back from getting both my thumbs jammed from playing indoor beach volleyball (one asshole insisted on spiking the ball hard in my general direction.)

I can answer this.

In many Ontario municipalities, strippers are licensed and get regular checkups (if the club they work at is legit which in this case was legit.) Cassie wasn’t the type to screw around as far as I knew. Certainly wasn’t easy to deal with the fact she stripped for guys for a living, but what are you going to do? You either deal with it or you don’t.

It’s not really something I’d want to do again though (especially dealing with her crazy ex-another story for another time.)

Also, I always wore a condom and didn’t insist on barebacking (easier for both of us.)

@ManchuCandidate: Whacked my hand on the inside of the truck while air drumming to Rage Against the Machine driving to the video store with my son.

@redmanlaw:
Seems like today is not a good day to be a Stinquer hand. My thumbs are killing me. I nearly iced them in my post game beer, but it would have looked odd to my fellow players.

@ManchuCandidate: Manchu, if you can score with strippers, you got major mojo. But its also good that you have a healthy and wise attitude, and you are cautious.

My first experience of strip clubs was in high school in Florida, when we underage lads would go to a decidedly low rent establishment called “Evil Peoples” in Fort Pierce, a decidedly low rent town. This is no lie or exaageration, I saw a pregnant stripper, and an amputee stripper (missing an arm) in that place. Not a good introduction to that experience.

Now in New Jersey, there is no nakedness allowed in any place that serves alcohol. So your choices are to go to a place where you watch women dance in lingerie, and drink, or go to a place where they get naked, but there is no booze, just a big cover. I never went to one of those, but I was taken on several occasions by title insurance salesmen to the ones where they stayed clothed. Those chicks, I almost admired, no nudity, it was all in their act, their sensuality.

And once, once in my life, I went to a Times Square place on the level of scores, I was again being entertained in a corporate setting, I would never have bothered, never have, otherwise.

Totally naked absolutely beautiful girls walking around offering lap dances. It was really so totally beyond anything I know or am comfortable with, I cannot trust my impressions.

My boss bought me a lap dance, over my objections, so everyone could laugh at me while I acted extremely uncomfortable while a beautiful girl sat in my lap and writhed.

I am such a geek I think I was more in anthropological observer mode than anything else. Kept thinking, boy, she knows her stuff, she is working so hard to get me hot and bothered, whats the point, I am so naive I still think they don’t actually DO anything in the champagne room they try to get you to go to with them, but I must be monumentally naive, because what else is the point.

Why pay to be teased?

Why pay to get a handjob, or a butt-hug? Its all so meh to me.

I am a guy. I remember being single, meeting a girl, there is a real attraction, you are young, its summer break, you have an encounter. Its a complete surprise (I was never a man who could go out and expect to hook up), there’s a thrill, passion is reciprocated, yes, yes, hate me, but there is nothing like that “yes” that is communicated by the “butt-lift,” when you pull down on the pants, and she lifts up her butt to let them slide off and you know you are both on the same wavelength with no more doubt or fear of rejection. And I think there is, can be, real connection, in those encounters, there always was for me. I always fell in love with any woman who would let me in her pants.

This is something I often say to describe how desperately shy I was as a young man, shy and suffering from low self-esteem. It was easier for me to “hook up” at a party, a bar where you are partying with a crowd, than to “ask a girl out.” I never had the confidence too ask a girl out, until after I had slept with her. But then I would fall hopelessly in love and scare her away with my desperate neediness.

That was me. Thats still me. If a chick loves me, I assume she is acting on insufficient knowledge and once she learns what a loser I am, she will leave me, and I will therefore sabotage it to lessen the suspense.

Welcome to my nightmare. I suck.

@Promnight:
First off, you don’t suck. A lot of guys have similar issues I’ve found. In their real jobs they are all confident, but try to share some intimacy (non physical) with someone they like and they get all Mr Fumbles.

I’ve been that guy. I still am at times especially at parties. I am still disgusted by my ineptitude with women. For some reason, strippers over look that.

I’m still single and not made whatever few real relationships I’ve had last past four months. Whatever mojo I have is very selective and rare.

@ManchuCandidate: Who ends it, Manchu, you or them? Just wondering, might give a clue.

I am just as diffident and lacking in confidence in my job.

Quite frankly, I am not insecure, I just know, I am no more right than anyone else.

As far as ebing worthy of love? Again, I am so introspective, I know my flaws, real ones. Noone is worthy of love, I can only accept love if I know it is given as an act of grace, undeserved, but still knowingly and freely given. You see? If someone tells me they love me because I am so great, then I know they are wrong, I am not so great, thats a fact, and there will come a day they realize it, and then the love will go too.

So, I really do believe I am as worthy of love as anyone. And noone is worthy, love itself is not love if it is deserved, then its worship, love is what is given without regard to worthiness. That love is the love that never fades.

Maybe you got to stop thinking you need to find someone who deserves your love?

@ManchuCandidate: Indoor beach volleyball?

Huh, HUH HUH?!

I don’t understand how those three words are uttered in the same breath. Feel free to continue on in a separate dialogue with Prommie about the ladies and the lovin’, but if you get a chance I’d love to hear more about indoor beach volleyball in Toronto. Are there leagues? Is this a new hipster thing like kickball was in DC and Brooklyn a few years ago? Is this more intense than indoor soccer (after breaking my nose, separating my shoulder, and tearing my MCL, and nearly getting arrested for beating up a guy on the opposing team I no longer play indoor soccer) or is this an excuse to drink beer and margaritas indoors while it’s 20 degrees F. outside?

Please explain.

kthxbai.

@Promnight:
Breakups are 1/2 and 1/2. I think. Even so, I suspect that I have a lot to do with it.

I used to think that way when I was younger and full of myself. Reality has a harsh way of popping that balloon.

Sorry if I came across like an arrogant ass. It wasn’t my intent. The only thing in my life that I have a high confidence in is my job. I’m very good at what I do, but most areas outside that? Not so much.

@SanFranLefty:
Oh I hope it’s not a hipster thing. I would not go if that were the case.

More the latter. An excuse to drink on a Sunday afternoon.

Someone had the bright idea to take a closed down factory and converted it into a big heated sandbox which is fine when the temp is 20degrees US American and it’s snowing outside. Diving into wet cold sand hurts. It’s not a formal league (basically a pickup game.)

It isn’t competitive although some people take it too seriously which is annoying and can be painful as hell.

@nojo: I think what happened is that I wrote this in open office and then copied and pasted into my AOL email which she then opened in her gmail and somewhere between those three formats something go fucked up.

It’s not just the random “20” but there is also the “boy dudes” thing where I originally wrote “boy” and then deleted it for “dudes” and obviously my deleted word somehow stayed in when I pasted it over.

I’ll double check next week.

Bart

@bart_calendar: Meanwhile, I’ll just keep copy-editing it live. Boy dudes, eh?

It makes me want to find out if http://www.boydudes.com is available.

Just sent in the latest edition. You’ll learn about lesbians with long fingernails, how to watch butt fucking in Saudi Arabia and why porn for women sucks.

@bart_calendar: and why porn for women sucks.

Yay! I am ALL OVER THAT!

I aim to please.

@bart_calendar: I could use some pleasure, thank you very much.