Sarah Palin: Call Your Agent

Oh hey guys: Up in Alaska, Mark Begich is about 800 votes to the good now, per official figures. But also, he’s extended that lead all day as the absentee votes rolled in.

So: the Cheerleader’s dreams of becoming a Senator? Looking slim right about now. That’s just tubes bad.

[pause]

What? What’s wrong?

30 Comments

Yay! Now she’s free to become the white Oprah.

One more step to Senator Droopy becoming completely irrelevant.

Now that’s change I can believe in.

God spoke on Nov. 4, just like you said he would. Don’t fuck around when God has spoke. Now go away.

/would rather be drinking a martini watching Jimi at Monterey Pop on VH 1 than reviewing dispute resolution clauses in a construction contract

@redmanlaw: I think she’s so desperate for attention that she’d do something so stupid as to set the gas pipeline on fire to get the national media back around her again, and so she can look all mavericky and leadery.

Thank the FSM she does not have access to nukes, at least that we know of.

@rptrcub:
There’s always porn.

It’s just too bad for her (and Alaska and McCain and pretty much everyone else) that she was born 20 years too early to take advantage of the inter tubes celebrity machine.

@ManchuCandidate: no no no no no. no. There will probably be enough Nailin Palin pornos in tribute to her in the discount bin of your local video store (unless Customs Canada seizes them — Canada, WTF?) to satisfy those urges.

@rptrcub:
If Canada Customs seizes those vids then it will be out of good taste and not the content.

I have no urges for Palin and would not watch any Nailin Palin vids except out of curiosity. She leaves me soft and unwilling in the worst possible way.

@Mistress Cynica: I thought Oprah was the white Oprah?

@ManchuCandidate: now now, be not so quick to correct.

Palin just appeared and spoke before the Republican Governors Klavern, and from reports I have seen, will have to check youtube, responded to, as opposed to answering, all of 3 questions, with what was described as a blizzard of random, unconnected words and phrases, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

I am starting to agree with those who speculate that she has become power-mad and is literally addicted to the the attention and adoration she got from appearing several times a day before baying mobs of worshipful cretins. The inevitable crash is gonna be a bitch.

Where’s my fucking avatar? Dammit, can anyone see my avatar?

Preznit Bunnypants is here in NYC today talkin’ at the UN about PEACE (believe it or not). Waldorf across the way is once again crawling with Feds … Palin was in town last night (Larry King) and security was pretty high as well. She’s going to cost us a lot more money before it’s over.

Okay, this time its got to work: Abracadabra, avatar, Appear!

Did Steve Miller commence to suck with Abracadabra, or did I just grow up?

@Prommie: You mean the Achewood Ray one? That’s the one I’m seein’!

@Prommie: Still the dog mixing drinks.

I’ve decided to take a cue from Sarah Palin and my co-workers and stop using my brain. It’s for the best. This intelligence thing just isn’t working out for me. If I’ve learned nothing over the past ten years, it’s that a vacant look and tits hanging out of your blouse are the only way to be successful in life. Probably a lot less stressful too. I sit here worrying about screwing a case up and making the correct legal argument and Tits McGee next door just hoists the girls and talks in her baby voice and all is fucking well. And look how far the talibunny went on little or no effort. Fuckin’ A, dudes! Why am I making these futile efforts to be taken seriously? God, I fucking hate my job. I wanna be more like the Talibunny. That bitch gets designer clothes thrown at her while I’m buying from the clearance rack at the Gap.
/rant

@Prommie: Naw, he was cool before that. But, yeah, fuck. He fell pretty fuckin far with that song. Damn. Let’s not speak of that. Let’s remember him for speaking of the pompetus (sp?) of love.

@BRB: Naw, Ray is the old one, though he remains my nighttime avatar. Just to confuse you all, I have two identities here, during the day I am Prommie, at night I am Promnight. Promnight’s avatar remains Ray, but I have changed Prommie’s avatar to the mystery 80s girl.

@Jamie Sommers:

If it’s any consolation for how you’re feeling, you made me choke on my morning yogurt with “Tits McGee” – women like that make me so f–ing stabby. That’s why the Talibunny haunted my nightmares for months. Luckily it’s been a while since I’ve had to put up with women like that – law school days, to be exact.

abra abra cadabra
I want to reach out and grab ya.

Damn, that hurts, and it won’t stop now.

Beautiful girls really do get the fucking breaks, ya know? The really beautiful ones, everywhere, all the time, all eyes are on them, all men try to get close to them, life is different for them in ways mortals like us will probably never come close to knowing.

Same goes for rich guys. Everyone, literally everyone sucks up to them, hoping they’ll throw some of that richness at them.

@blogenfreude: You’ve got CB, we’ve got the Geezer today in Cobb County, campaigning for Saxby Shameless (and sadly, I cannot be there). However, this statement from McCain back in naught-2 surfaced in re those 2002 attack ads in which Max Cleland, a Vietnam vet, was compared to bin Laden:

“I’d never seen anything like that ad,” McCain said at the time of the spot, which was widely condemned by Democrats. Putting pictures of Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden next to the picture of a man who left three limbs on the battlefield is “worse than disgraceful,” said McCain. “It’s reprehensible.”

Also, the Dems here need to get off their asses and start attacking Shameless. The other side is exploiting the Angry White Men (TM) who are mad that a black man will be their overlord.

@Prommie: Don’t fall into the trap of putting them on a pedestal. I do that sometimes, and bemoan having to compete with them for male attention. But eventually I remember that I’m not interested in men who are mesmerized by beauty to the point of completely ignoring whether a woman is kind and intelligent. Women who tolerate men who say things like, “Yeah, she’s annoying, but she’s so hot,” deserve them completely.

@Prommie: Sarah’s enjoying a dead-cat bounce this week, what with all those interviews followed by the governors conference. But starting this weekend she faces oblivion — Matt and Greta won’t be dropping by again for cooking tips. Her only hope is the Senate, and that’s far from a given.

@Promeranian, Jamie Sommers: I heart the dog mixing drinks.

@Jamie, SanFranLefty: The members of the Snarky Indian Lawyer Girls club (actually, just three of my friends who worship at the altar of irreverence) get by on their wits and by not taking shit offa any one. Those who try are covered with puncture wounds caused by cute shoes or high heeled boots.

@mellbell: No, I have two of them for sisters, and am relatively impervious to the “charms,” if anything I can get very put off by any expectation of entitlement or signs of deliberate efforts to use the assets, like the Palin Wink, hell, the whole Palin phenomena.

Its funny, though, the boob effect, boobs produce a deep, automatic response, its amazing to me just to watch myself. I become Homer Simpson, “Mmmmmm, boobies.”

@Prommie: Oh fuck! Now that song is in my head accompanied by visions of my mom doing jazzercise circa 1981. Thanks, man.
Manchu!! Little help please??

@SanFranLefty: She drafted a memo for a gender discrimination case citing section 1981. She actually quoted the fucking statute before summarizing a bunch of Title VII/1981 cases. And our boss acted like everything was copasetic. My migraines were not amused.

@redmanlaw: “promeranian”, FTW! Well played, sir.

@Prommie:
I think I’m sort of immune to whiles of the pretteh.

A story. Long ago, it was a Fri Night and I was hungry and needed a beer so I went with a friend to an “Irish” pub. Mere moments after I parked my ass on the chair and took my coat off, a group of 20 something females walked up to us. The best looking one of the bunch sauntered up to ugly old me and said “Can we have your table?” as she jiggled her chest.

I looked at her chest and then her face and then said, “No.” The look on her face went from lusty to bitchy. This really pissed me off. Did she think we were that fucking stupid to just give away our table because someone waves her chesticles in my face? Apparently, so. To rub salt into the wound I pointed at the unused chair next to our table and said, “Why don’t you just take that chair, stand around it and pretend it’s a table?”

I happily endured the catty looks from the group of them for much of that night. And then my mom wonders why I’m not married? Heh.

@Tommmcatt Yet Again: Lena Horne. Sophia Loren. Eartha Kitt. Tina Turner.

@Prommie: Oh, yes, she won’t be able to get off the needle and will end her career appearing at neo-Nazi music festivals giving speeches about re-taking America from the Marxist, Islamofascist pretenders.

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