Election Night Team Coverage

This thing working? Yes? Good. And don’t click on Florida too much, or you’ll go blind.

So here we are: The Greatest Night in American History. Maybe. We’ll post any notable developments up here, but otherwise the party’s in the comments. Remember to drink every time Tim Russert gets mentioned on MSNBC.

Breaking news from the HoloStinque…

7:49 pm: Stinque analysts unanimously agree that the CNN hologram sucks.

8 pm: MSNBC calls Pennsylvania for Barry. Can we break out the Cristal yet?

8:31 pm: Kay Hagen beats Elizabeth Dole. Atheists represent!

9:01 pm: Arizona “too close to call.” Enjoy that for a few moments.

9:15 pm: Russert reference on MSNBC! Drink!

9:24 pm: Ohio! Code Blue!

10:56 pm: Virginia turns blue. Minutes away?


Vermont and Maine have gone for the Unicorn with majority of precincts reporting!

Everybody go fucking nuts!

Oooh! Kentucky turned red!

I have no idea how Electoral Map Thingy is supposed to work, and who’s calling the states for Google…

But I do know how many beers are in the fridge. And that’s what matters.

OMG NEW THREAD. Time to open the next bottle of wine.

@FlyingChainSaw: CNN is saying McCrzy up 9 pts with 1 percent in.

@nojo: Leave a note in the other thread for everyone to come over here! I NEED EVERYBODY WITH ME.

This map frightens and confuses me. It keeps sending me to Montana to check on non-existent House results.

WTF is CNN doing the holodeck bullshit? When does it turn evil and Jessica Yellen turn into Moriarity?

Kentucky – the Union state that never joined the Confederate States of America and has been doing everything possible to pretend it did for the last 140+ years. I guess Mitch probably won his bid for a (God help us) fifth term. He’ll be needing to find a nice cushy spot in Washington for his wife who won’t be Secretary of Labor much longer, not that she’s bothered to do anything for labor in that job. Except let companies force employees to work overtime without compensation and such as.

Is it a coincidence she’s the only surviving member of the original Bush cabinet?


I just sent a crackberry message to my friend who’s directing and demanding confirmation that a Star Wars fan designed that shit.

Mark Warner just took a Senate seat in Virginia, per CNN.

Shakes head in shame and glances at his Star Wars DVD collection.

(I was over on the other thread commenting on the holo-shit…I look forward to JonStew ripping on that tonight)

Nifty feature Nojo…we’re rocking now!

@ManchuCandidate: Well, my BFF was of the film school demographic who all wanted to make films because they saw Star Wars at an impressionable age. So, I’m sure the person who made that up is of that demo as well.

@Dave H: Not true. She’s kept a lot of chauffeurs, hairdressers and make-up people laboring hard for her, lo these many years.

ok that holodeck thing on cnn is creepy – plus how can she not do a ‘thank you obi wan blitzer you’re my only hope’ – i mean c’mon!

ps- oh yeah – hi y’all –

The drinking has commenced. Hendricks Gin Martinis, they will keep coming through the appetizer and salad course, then wine will begin.

OK, best friend who is directing CNN tonight just admitted he made fun of the hologram all week in meetings. NOT HIS FAULT DUDES.

Exit polling from the Biden campaign:
Obama number first
Fl 52-44
Mi 60-39
Mh 57-43
Mn 60-39
Pa 57-42
Va 55-45
Wi 58 42
Oh 54-45
Nc 52-48
In 52-48
Mo 52-48
Nv 55-45
Nm 56-43
Ia 58-42
Wv 44-55

This account out of California brought on my first tears of the day. If only more people were confronted with evidence that their prejudices are unfounded, maybe we wouldn’t need to talk about gay marriage anymore and could just let people marry the people they love.

@Promnight: I have laid in a supply of Jack Daniel’s and Bushmill (couldn’t find Jameson). I don’t like mixed drinks, in general.

According to CNN King, “Real” Virginia is going PG, but only up 7%

@Promnight: Faugeres red wine for me, gin and tonics for Rome Boy. Had appies of Vietnamese nems (oh, France, thanks for colonizing), and saucissson. Will finish up with diner-style cheeburgers with fried onions and melty cheese at about 3AM.

@RomeGirl: And besides, they stole it from MSNBC, which was running the holodeck all spring.

All of which turns me very old school: Chalk and a green visor would be perfect.

I agree the hologram stuff is 1975 Star Wars I stuff. JesusMaryandJoseph!! Wolfie is positively creaming his shorts over this. Get Anderson on there! Wolf is a total fucktard. Guess its a distraction while they wait to do more winner projections.

@AARPrick: Don’t you blaspheme about my Anderson.

Is it just me, or is Joe Scarborough completely shit-faced right now?

@RomeGirl: Sorry Rome Girl, I actually love Anderson on there. Wolf is such a douche, I don’t understand why he is the “anchor” and I use the term loosely.

Silent click, love the obi wan snark.

@mellbell: How can you tell the difference?

The producers seem to have given him the toy microphone. And then they keep forgetting to turn it on.

I’m getting the Prop 8 ad: “Marriage is between a woman and man.” But it shows Talibunny and Plugz. Did I miss some news?

@AARPrick: Wolfy has the same breathing patterns of Neve Campbell. Don’t love it. Anderson can do no wrong. Did you see the ad of him waking through the jungle in his tshirt? LOVE.

Oh DL. Why? Why be a weaker less funny version of the Daily Show?

it is so hysterical that ass clown scarborough has been shunted off into a seperate studio – its probably burning his ass that rachel is at the big kids table and not him – bwah ha ha gawd i hates him! now if only they made tweety sit there too…

Really? I really should defend Neve, but she went to a rival high school…

Just catching Psychogeezer’s last words on the campaign plane on MSNBC. It’s all but a concession speech, he really does sound like a sad grandpa.

@RomeGirl: No, I didn’t see it. I hardly watch broadcast TV, but if he was on more I would change my ways. Oh, Anderson is now on. I am scrolling between CNN and BBC America, which is a bit tedious tonight.

@silent clicking majority: Now that’s impressive: a commenting debut with an avatar. Grab a bottle from the fridge. We’re gonna be here all night.

@RomeGirl: My first time in France, I did not know, I bought Saucisson at a country market, several varieties, farm made, the one with the pistachios down the center, one crusted with black pepper, one relatively straightforward, and at US customs, they toook my saucissons, to imagine my feelings at losing my saucissons, think of Eric Roberts in The Pope of Greenwich Village screaming “Paulie, they took my thumbs, they took my thumbs.” Substitute the word “saucisson for “thumbs.”

Dodger, Virginia, North Carolina, and Florida. If the exit polling is accurate, if the machines count the votes, its all over.

Got my couch. Got my stolen internet connection. Got my V&T. Can’t find MSNBC in high def though, so CNN it is. Grrrrrrrrr….

@ManchuCandidate: He’s got that mid-sentence breathing pattern that is so Neve. And one day you’ll buy me a drink and I’ll tell you about that dance movie she made.

@AARPrick: It might just be the ads on CNN Int’l. As a card-carrying fag hag, I am not one to lust over teh gheys. But OMG.

CNBC shows Sad Panda’s HQ. Singer sang (Prophetic?) “He’s a real nowhere man…”

@Promnight: You really need to come over here and we need to document our foodie/drinkie experience. I think Stinquers need to see us meeting God face to face.

@homofascist: Does high def let you see more accurate results? I might have to surf on up there, I always forget I have that option now.

Feeling bad mojo suddenly…need to shift gears down. Or just start mixing drinks…

Polls are closing across America. Do we really need talking points now?

@Promnight: Slip one of them over this way, barkeep. I got some cheap ass but tasty Washington merlot, ONE Guinness, a bottle of some kind of white wine knocking around the fridge for a while, some Mexican beers and a Fronch sparkling wine from Trader Joe’s all tarted up in an ambassador-class label and foil that should come with a Nobel Prize and a few small cigars . What I don’t have is any Sapphire, Turkey or Jameson’s, or tequila for margaritas. Or single-malt.

@silent clicking majority: Hi, Click. Pull up a chair. I’m building a fire soon.

Forgot to mention, at my polling place this morning the only activists I saw were handing out No on 8 info. They were strategically placed between my polling place and the one a block away.

And they call PA for the Unicorn!

We got JNOV country! By TWO votes cast early this morning . . .

@rml@nojo@all – thanks y’all.

MSNBC calling PA and NH for Hope already! woo hoo! time to crack open the prosecco!

@RomeGirl: I must call my deli “Savoire Vivre.” People must learn that savoire vivre is the only true church. Simply to learn to pay attention to, and appreciate, everything in life, and by appreciating, to give thanks for. And as is so often the case with americans who feel they are “connoisusers” or “gourmets,” there is no snobbery to it, it is as much the ability to pick out and enjoy the best of what is most simple in life, as it is a simple collecting of the extravagant in life, like a birder simply notching off the species.

@ManchuCandidate: email me, and I’ll tell you my poison…and why.

@silent clicking majority:
Seriously? I don’t have MSNBC on my cable package.

Florida is 55-45 for the Unicorn.

Could be over very shortly.

@Pedonator: Way to go, JNOV and nabisco. MSNBC also calling NH, NJ, Del, and Mass for O. THey’re calling shit like drunken monkeys.

@Promnight: We obviously were separated at birth, and our blissful reunion shall be gluttonous and shall take no prisoners. How about you buy that B&B you were loving, and COME OVER.

@ manchu – yes they did – I can’t believe it – tweety is blathering on about the new gettysburg or some such crap. I believe NH is solid but I never thought they’d call PA this early.

Tweety:”mccains plan has crashed already”


BO 77 electoral vote
Fuckfce 39 electoral vote

ADD: GO fucking nuts!

PG’s hotel ballroom? Death Valley.

He’s a real nowhere Man,
Sitting in his Arizona Land,
Making all his nowhere plans
for nobody.

Doesn’t have a point of view,
Knows not where he’s going to,
Isn’t he a bit mad at THAT ONE?
Nowhere Man, please listen,
You don’t know what you’re missin’,
Nowhere Man, the world is pleased as punch.

Creepy Cocktober/Blovember theme. Phoenix Boys Choir…

@silent clicking majority: and this means I can get blind drunk earlier, rather than later

My man Howie- Gov. Dr. Chairman Howard Dean – is getting his due on MSNBC . . . “the beginning of the healing of America . . . ”

“They all laughed when I proposed a 50 state strategy for the Democratic Party . . . ” Suck it, DLC. The talking heads made the point that The Eagle pulled this shit off by making a new party, independent of the Demrat party, by reaching out to the people and making a party in his image. As a state party official several years ago, I looked around and saw a playing field occupied by hacks and slugs who were waiting for their time to move up and start doing well for themselves, their friends and family and thought “we need some new blood.” The “progressives” were out there, but they had nothing to cling to or form around. Then came Howard Dean. I really believe that without him, there would be no Black Eagle. With Hillary, we saw her bringing the same old hacks along and all that entails. I pray for a new start for our Democratic Party.

Oh noes! CNN’s web map has already called Oklahoma for the Geez. And I had such Hope the Unicorn might bleed some of teh crazy out of my paternal homeland. But they call it with 0% precincts reporting, so weigh in Stinquers, could we be looking at a last-minute upset for the grand prize of 7 electoral votes?

I scrupulously avoided any talk of the race on my call last week to my Okie Dad and his wife. Though I have suspicions Dad may have done a reverse-Bradley in the privacy of the voting booth.

Florida 55% OBAMA
45% for FUCKFACE


@ManchuCandidate: Are you serious, they are actually singing that song? I’m finding it hard to keep up with y’all, have to take frequent smoke breaks on the patio to remain calm. And the boys’ choir?, otherwise known as Repub-bait?

Oh Yes! Oh Yes! Oh Yes!!

This is what I wanted to see!! Let the blue flow!! Especially into Florida.

PS. Wish I could join you in a drink, but it’s about 4.5 hours until knock-off time and I can enjoy a tipple.

@redmanlaw: I’m ready to heal.

As long as we can still have war crimes trials for the baby-raping asshats that have been running this country for the last eight years.

Yes. Apparently someone did a sound check while CNBC was checking in on PG’s ballroom and the band sang the song.

Later on they showed the Choir boys.

I admit to giggling like a kid.

Fox has Obama with81 electoral votes
Fuckface holding at 39


Go nuts!

@Pedonator: McCain had a bigger lead in OK (30 pts) that anywhere else. I am pleased that they haven’t called the Senate race for Inhofe yet. It’s probably inevitable, but at least Rice is putting up a fight.

@silent clicking majority: Glad you’re silent no more.

OFSM, they’re explaining the way Palm Beach County chooses their candidate. It’s insane! They have to fill in a blank to darken an area between two boxes, creating a kind of conceptual arrow pointing to the candidate? WTF?

@silent clicking majority: New Commenter Tip: See that arrow at the right of a commenter name? Click it for a surprise! (Someday I should add “reply” to the graphic…)

NPR has The Unicorn passing 100 !! W00t!

Anyone notice that there is a “Return to America” button hovering over Canada on this Google applet? Manchu?

@Pedonator: They used that in OK too. No one seemed to have a problem figuring it out.

Nothing from Missoura yet, the Bell-wether state (Sheep with no nuts )

@ManchuCandidate: Return, but keep your pharma cheap, m’kay?

@Pedonator: That’s how they do it here in DC, too. The thing I don’t get is, if you’re confused, why not read the damn instructions? Don’t just puzzle over it and do what you think might maybe be right; take an extra ten seconds and make sure your vote actually counts.

@Mistress Cynica: I know you know I was joking, but over the last few days looking at electoral-vote.com’s map, I had this horrified perverse pride that my Sooners were stubbornly minding the widest gap in favor of the Geez. Like, don’t disappoint me crazees!

Now, on my maternal side, there’s actual Hope for the Hoosiers.

And they just called it against Lizzie Dole! Yay for Godless Americans!

I just asked my BFF CNN director why they didn’t call PA and he asked who else was calling it? Scared. Fox News called it and then RECANTED. wtf??

PA, not CNN. Drunks.

@Mistress Cynica: NC was one of the races where I really wanted to rub somebody’s face in it.

@RomeGirl: “Taste this,” its my favorite thing to say to people. Last night I made a pumpkin sauce for pasta, saute in butter garlic and shallot, then add diced up pumpkin, this was stuff I saved from the carving of the halloween pumpkin, then about 3/4 cup of veal stock and 1/4 cup dry white wine (I buy those veal breasts that are 99 cents a pound, mostly bones, I make provencale style veal stews and tons of stock which I freeze, that is savoire vivre, veal stock is good for EVERYTHING). Then I totally eyeballed the addition of ground nutmeg, cayenne, and french four-spice, which is a 19th century mixture of spices more often seen in savories these days, white pepper, ginger, cloves, and ground ginger. Take it off the stove, add 1/4 cup heavy cream, and because I was lazy, a generous sprinkle of Wondra (which by the way is the very very best flour for flouring something you are suateeing), say at least a tablespoon. Then use one of those hand-blenders till its smooth.

If I weren’t rushing, I think I would have thrown in some ground pine nuts, at the last, add a dash of lemon juice, and this fucking sauce, which was fucking free, made from the cooking water I cooked veal in and the innards of our halloween pumpkin, was better (with some grated parmesan added, I forgot that) than the $20 veal chops I served with the penne that had hthis sauce on it.

Savoire vivre.

Liddy dole lost, I am doing the Can Can.

@FlyingChainSaw: Where’s your Jeebus now, Liddy?? BWAHHAHAHA. Hurry home to Bob, now — that 4 hour erection is starting to hurt.

@mellbell, @Mistress Cynica: I just think the ballot should be as user-friendly as a bloody iPhone. They need to hire Apple to run the next election. I mean, the choices are yes/no or multiple choice. We shouldn’t have to read instructions. We’re not assembling a piece of IKEA furniture here.

CNN’s senate board shows Big John going down? Tejas is blue.

@Pedonator: What in the name of God is the matter with Palm Beach County’s ballot creators? Did they deliberately try to screw up this election, too?

CNN is being really conservative, and even they just called Pennsylvania!

@lynnlightfoot: That’s my guess. And that the same system is used in DC and OK…I’m putting my tinfoil hat on. I suspect we’ll discover the company in charge of designing those ballots is a subsidiary of Neil Bush’s edumacation corporation.

Yay to JNOV, JNOV Jr, Nabisco and any other PA stinqers. “Conservative” CNN has called it for the Unicorn.

@Pedonator: They need to hire Apple to run the next election.

MobileMe users might disagree.

@Pedonator: Fair enough, but is it so much to ask that if it isn’t that the onus be on the user to figure it out?

@Promnight: we need a month together, no less.

I think me, my mom and my aunt just got CNN to call PA on CNN. My BFF really loves my mom.

Looks like fauxnews is broken. It’s not showing anything now.


Jesus – FOX is calling Pennsylvania for Obama!

@Pedonator: I saw you edit that comment! But anyway, I’m probably just being crotchety about it in that way that only someone who has never ever had issues with that ballot can be. It’s legitimate cause for concern if hundreds or thousands are ballots are being thrown out or subjected to questionable scrutiny because of it.


All the bile and bitter tears are clogging the intertubez.

@Mistress Cynica: Feel betrayed, Liddy? Maybe God thinks you suck the juicy rat’s ass.

I need NPR to cross to Phoenix so I can hear the wailing, gnashing of teeth, and rending of garments.

@nojo: Point taken, though I didn’t see the need to sign up for Mobile Me.

@mellbell: There just should not be any onus involved in something as simple as voting. But yes, it would be nice to imagine that all voters can read, or even that most voters would read if they didn’t just assume a check in a box would do the trick.

@mellbell: I’m always embarrassed when I edit a comment for anything other than punctuation or typos. You caught me!

And I’m blushing, but that may just be the wine.

@FlyingChainSaw: Road trip to not pray to no God in Nawth Carolina yoo hoo!

Shout out to the Keystoners!

@nojo: I hear onal sex is all the rage with the young folks these days.

Hey, there’s a Nixon to kick around in Mizzoorah….a Dem!

Jesse Helms is rotting in his grave!

@FlyingChainSaw: But Latin American coke – with real sugar, not that corn syrup shite

CNN John King mentioned that Kay’s seat belonged to uber shit Jesse Helms. I’m betting that the coffin is spinning at 26000 rpm right now.


Tom Delay thinks Nancy Pelosi’s personal Congress is going to double the minimum wage in the next six months. Dream on, Delay!

Tom Delay is on my TV screen, and now I know how it could happen that even the stupid and evil republicans could come to rally behind the stupid and evil GWB. Whenever a republican would say, “yeah, but he soooooo fucking stupid and evil,” the other republicans would point at Tom Delay and say, Well, he’s not as stupid and evil as Tom here, and he’s doing fine.” Yes, Tom Delay was necessary, to allow republicans to support W, simply because he was worse, on every measure, than W, and thus established the precedent.

Why is anyone letting Delay on the air? He’s a loser. He’s irrelevant.

But hey, if that’s the best the Republicans can put in front of the camera…


I hope she does, and I hope that the bill is officially named the “Fuck You Delay” law.

@Promnight: Delay famously cautioned the class of 06 freshman congressman to not unpack their bags. I think it was Patrick Murphy of PA who said “Tom Delay should be the one packing his bags, I think he’s going to jail”.

Shout out to Senator Udall!

According to the CNN “projection” is RML’s candidate Udall wins easily in NM.

Everybody’s pretending like Pelosi will suddenly get a backbone.

The missus is so confident she forced me to put on Faux Noise, however briefly.

@Tommmcatt Yet Again: I’d like it to be called, in honor of Prommie, the “Taste This” Act of 2009.

@ManchuCandidate: It’s gonna be a sweep for that clan tonight, if I’m not mistaken.

I have a report from near McCain HQ. Will post after I take the dog out.

Yup. Looks like RML’s projections a week ago was right. NM is going blue blue blue.

@nabisco: He has been around for a while, one of the few who hasn’t switched parties to run for an office. Seems to have become much more conservative as atty gen. Around MO and KS the politicians change parties so often and lack what used to be party platform it is usually impossible to tell them apart. Except for the ones who like young boys, obviously republicans.
I didn’t vote in some local races, fewer signatures to recall.

Faux is so confused they just ran the same photo for Udall they had for Tim (Tom?) Johnson, who although still enfeebled won with 70 percent of the vote.

the missus is quickly bailing on Faux

The Google widget seems to be all verklempt, I just keep getting that spinny thing. Nojo’s server on the other hand, ROCKS!

Ooh, they’re sniping at each other on the Noise…Brit Hume acts like his face is gonna fall off!

@Pedonator: The Googlet was spinning madly from 6 – 6:55 p.m. I was on the verge running MSNBC’s widget until it started working just a few minutes before post time.

@nabisco: That’s right. That’s Righteous Coke. Not the fucking godless Coke in the states that makes Jesus blow lunch. That’s why America is all fucked up.

FOX analysis about New Mexico, in summary: “majority of those people are living below the poverty line, majority are hispanics, those people like Obama.”

@mellbell: Spinning like the Mac spinner that isn’t a beachball. It means something ain’t working.

Charlie Criss has been called back to Tallahassee on an “urgent legal matter” and won’t be able to attend the McCain party? Interrresting.

Now I am seeing Mike Murphy, who, in 2000, I admired, because he obviously, in an attempt to save his party, steered McCain into a bold speech downright repudiating the influence of the fundie chrsitians on the republican party, and of course McCain lost South Caroline, and I thought Murphy would switch. So what I am saying is I viewed him somehat sympathetically, and he was a young, not bad looking guy for a pale balding political dweeb.

Tonight, he looks like he is about to die of liver failure. Seriously, this is sad, poor guy, thats how he stomachs remaining a republican, remaining blind drunk. I have never seen a guy so young look so deathly.

It’s the hilarious Tom Cruise commercial! They should turn it into a series!

@Mistress Cynica: And I was just about to start a Thank You Charlie PAC, donations to be used toward hiring a male escort to give him the weekend of his dreams. Was just on rentboy.com, gift-shopping. Anyone have inside information as to whether he likes twinks, bears, leather daddies, power suits?

But — Thank You Charlie PAC on hold for now.

@ManchuCandidate: We couldn’t take more than five minutes, but they were five minutes well spent. Those guys are more unsettled at 9 pm on an election night than anyone without access to limbic LSD should be.

@Mistress Cynica: Crist has been standing up Geezer all fall. Speaking of which, when’s the wedding?

@FlyingChainSaw: You must buy mexican coke in the bodegas, or you must buy Kosher coke during the high holidays, those are the righteous coke. Cane sugar, not corn syrup.

@nojo: I really wanted to like that movie, too.

@nabisco: . . . and a lot of those people liked Hillary, and are veterans or active military families or have an affiliation with the defense industry (incl Los Alamos), and are Catholic and are rural. Efforts to peel them off for the Geez went nowhere, however. Obama is the new JFK here. People will have paint by number pictures of him and Jesus up on the wall. From what I’ve seen about the campaign, I have to say it was impressive as hell. Those fucking Republicans just got rolled here. Also, people like a winner and they got on the bandwagon. Richardson almost missed his opportunity to get on board.

@ electric prom – remember when sugar was called “white death”? Too funny.

@Mistress Cynica: Is it greedy to still want him to win Virginia, North Carolina, and Indiana?

MSNBC calls OHIO for Obama! But let us all remember 2004, when I passed out late at night in a hotel room in suburban Atlanta thinking that Kerry had won, then woke up a few hours later to utter horror.

@mellbell: Not at all.

@Pedonator: I remember turning off the TV when they called Florida for Gore in 2000.

Call in the mop team, someone spilled blue paint!

That is about 4minutes longer than I’ve watched Faux (we got a free preview of it up here in Canada City.)

Gah. All I see is Maverick as a Nazee.

Fox called Ohio for Obama! Fucking OHIO!!!!!!!

@Mistress Cynica: @Pedonator:

Oh, I thought I was breaking that.

Whootah anyways!!!!!!

Ugh, msnbc is teasing me again – they’re calling OHIO for Hopey… i think i need to hear this one from faux news before i start the happy dance. but scarborough looks/sounds like someone stole his shiny toy, which is lovely.

ABC broke in with a Special Report: Obama has taken Ohio.

@Tommmcatt Yet Again: msnbc as well, can’t fuckin believe it, fla. about to fall?

But OH isn’t even really close, now is it? Maybe all the plumbers had late service calls?

Sometimes you just clap at a victory and go on with life feeling a little happier. Sometimes you kiss the person next to you whether you know them or not, and form a conga line and start high-kicking blind drunk.

And sometimes, you tear down the goalposts. I want to tear down the goalposts while kissing you all in a Conga line.

I think OH and FL been called for Barry Hussein … of course I’m watching the BBC.

@Mistress Cynica: I was at a big Democratic hotel ballroom party when they flipped FLA for Big Evil. Took the air right out of the room and you know the rest.

So I went on a little recon mission to the Biltmore to see all the goings on. What a clusterfuck!

First of all, cops everywhere!! Motorcycle cops on every intersection (sometimes up to six) and in many driveways along Camelback Road and 24th street. The entrance to the Biltmore is about 1/4 mile north of Camelback Road on 24th Street. Traffic is backed up for about a 1/2 mile all three ways into that entrance.

At Camelback and 24th is where McCain’s condo is. The lights are on at his condo but I couldn’t see anyone milling around. Across the street and visible from his window are about half a dozen tools IN SUITS with McCain Palin signs trying to get people to honk. (No dice.)

Up the road at 24th and Missouri, where one turns to get into the Biltmore, there are at least 12 uniformed officers at this intersection, watching the protestors. There are maybe four or five. It’s hard to see now that it’s dark. They’ve got signs that say “McCain Erratic” “Arizona Divorces McCain” (2 of these) “Bad Companions” (wtf?) and two hand drawn Obama signs.

From the intersection, the private road to get to the hotel is at a complete standstill. I waited for a while to see how far I could go, but the prospect of sitting in my car for an hour or more only to end up with a bunch of tightass neocons didn’t seem worth it, so I turned around and came home.

I took one or two stealth pictures from my cell phone camera but they didn’t come out well. Phoenix recently passed a law prohibiting texting while driving and with all those cops around, it didn’t feel prudent to tempt fate. Will try to upload the photos I did take though.

@Promnight: That is what the inauguration will be. Come to DC and I will do everything in my power to show y’all a great time.

This is over. Given the CA-OR-QA (and HI) block, it is over.

I am going to just drink and smile now…

NM: Viva el Aguilar! Que Viva! Que Viva!

Oh god. Someone please hold me. It’s so close…

Black Eagle obliterated the myth of the “T” in PA, i.e. P’burgh and Philly with Alabama down the middle. He’s turned all red to all blue, fuckin hell!

Bolton on BBC using that GOP talking point that we are “center-right” nation … he should be punched out.

@Jamie Sommers: Meanwhile, they had footage of the Grant Park security checks on MSNBC and when all they showed was guards giving incoming bags a cursory poke I cringed. That’s it?

@redmanlaw: Hey! Slate can’t do that! That’s my Victory Headline for the next post!

Slate Magazine needs to go outside and turn around 3 times and spit.

Googlet is using AP, and AP always calls last. In case you’re wondering why Ohio is still gray.

Message from flippin’ from Grant Park: Now in the mob waiting at Congress to get past first checkpoint. Ohio news spread through crowd like audio wave. Overall pretty chill vibe still.

NPR Calls New Mexico for the Unicorn.

Help. I can’t breathe…

@mellbell: Build the goalposts, we’ll be there to tear them down. Huzzah!

Is Barry going to cross 270 during the Daily Show?

Hee hee. PG’s in a bubble and Hank Williams Jr playing.

A moment of sadness to grieve that fucktwat Mitch McConnell is projected to keep his seat in Kentucky.

@Jamie Sommers: I assume you wore pearls to go behind enemy lines?

@Pedonator: On behalf of my fellow Kentuckians, please accept my deepest apologies.

Cool. All the Wonkette and Cynics Party refugees are here! Sometime, after Barry wins and all, will somebody tell me WTF happened to Cynics Party?

@nojo: Only if we, and Jon, are lucky. Looks like it’s gonna be called way before then. Sad Grandpa gets schooled tonight!

Funny story. The Democratic mayor of Phoenix is having an election night party (open to the public) at the Wrigley Mansion which is up the road from the Biltmore. The mansion is set on a hill where you can look down at the Biltmore grounds (where Geezer will give his concession speech).

Some of my friends are trying to get in to that. I’ll let you know what I hear.

MSNBC credits “college-educated white voters” for the potential win. Obama’s first move is to forgive all student loans.

@Pedonator: But all the Repugnants keeping their seats are psychos who can and should be marginalized.

“College educated whites” a key demographic going to Obama – JNOV, Manchu, Jamie?

Time to bust out the sham-pagne?

@lentinus: Fling feces, monkey!

(If someone doesn’t dish, I’ll catch you up later.)

@Pedonator: They start at 10 tonight, so it’s entirely possible.

@Pedonator: Left Coast programming note: live Daily Show in 15 minutes.


There’s no more feces left to fling. Geezer and Bunny emptied all the buckets during the campaign.

@lentinus: Hi. Can you bring in some more wood for the fire on your way in? Thanks. Drinks will be up in a minute — then we’re gonna steal a big ol’ fuckin’ OBAMANOS sign from the polling place up the street.

Nojo – thanks for mentioning America’s Most Important Jew,
I would have missed it.

@redmanlaw: la senora los manda saludos y felicitaciones

@mellbell: No worries, your third cousins once-removed have just given Mitch what he always wanted: a position on the bottom ;-)

STFU Wolfie.

Most of the Unicorn States haven’t even begun to count the fucking votes.

Can I say again that Wolfie is an asshole? Yes, Wolf is an ASSHOLE.

My laptop is on the fritz. Will check in when I can. Drinking is progressing.

Louisiana for McCain slays me. In a bad way. ARE YOU PEOPLE FUCKING RETARDED.


Thanks to SFL for telling me Ohio went blue. People on the train were giving me fucked up looks cuz I was crying.

@redmanlaw: No but when I saw the formality of the the Young Republitards nearby, I pulled a suit jacket off the backseat and put it on as I inched up 24th Street (people walking on the sidewalk were making faster progress) just in case the cops were checking cars.

I figured at least I could say I was hotel staff. They’d probably buy that better than any attempt to say I was invited to the paleface hoedown.

@redmanlaw: No problem. Here in California, they’re starting to celebrate early. I saw a dude on stilts dressed like Uncle Sam staggering through traffic near the polling place!

@JNOV: I think we’re there. Can’t wait for Palin’s knife in McDiapers’ back.

I’m so glad my parents are alive to see the first black president elected. This is the happiest day of my life since Jr was born. OMG! OMFG! OMG! WE WON!

@RomeGirl: It wasn’t NOLA. It was those fucks up in Baton Rouge who let ’em drown.

MSNBC correspondent: “I am in a sea of O here in Chicago.” How many babies conceived at Grant Park tonight?

I told Jr we’re staying in tonight in case the wingnuts riot. He said, “They don’t riot. They lynch.”

Who’s the a-hole whitey interviewing “surrogates” in Grant Park on MSNBC?

@RomeGirl: Yes, half are retarded and the other half are drunk.

@nojo: I have been wondering about 11/4 babies.

Only 20 votes up for grabs at the top of hour. No likely Daily Show O.

Have you done your victory dance? You MUST do your victory dance. Right now.

@JNOV: I’m Hoping™ the new paradigm doesn’t include strange fruit.

Gawd I don’t even wanna go to the loo just in case I miss the call…

Yes he does. Trying to make things sound closer than it really is.

I can finally turn off CNN and go to The Daily Show.

AMF (audios motherfucker) Wolfie!

@nojo: A new political term of art:


Bachmann leading…
Shep standing by his call that PA has Hope no matter how Geezer whines

@FlyingChainSaw: How many babies conceived tonight will be named Obama?!

CNN must have heard the snark on their holograms ’cause they haven’t done any more Princess Leia shit….thank god.

Sen. Stuart Smalley? Hopey shit, he’s leading now.

hey, where can i get all the congressional districts?

@AARPrick: Yeah, my BFF had been making fun of it all week and I think he pulled it…

@RomeGirl: Select State and Race in the Electoral Thingy.

@mellbell: We must all, everyone who can, come to DC, this is HISTORY.

@Promnight: I can recommend a hotel that is cheap and across the street from the metro. The Hotel Harrington. The bar on the first floor is made for this crew.

@Promnight: Hotels are already sold out. Maybe stay in VA or MD. Jr and I are going.

@ManchuCandidate: Trying to introduce false tension to get people to stick around for the surprise ending.

Even Motel 6 is sold out and charging some ungodly rate. NYT has a story about it.

@FlyingChainSaw: Have I told you lately that I love you?

@JNOV: thanks. The pumpkin and I had fun making it…..

Congrats to you and the Philly contingent for making sure PA was blue for the Hope ™.

Souvenir hunters have cleaned out the immediate neighborhood of any Obama signs.

@nabisco: Thank you, thank you.

Lots of PG’s folks and hardcore Repugs are channel surfing with tears as we speak.

@AARPrick: Yay! Thanks! And to think that 24 hours ago, I was seriously considering not voting. Thanks to all for being gentle yet firm. I’m about to post a picture of Jr in his Obama Superman shirt.

These are moments we will always remember, thanks stinkers, for sharing them with me.

I read, and quoted here, a nice little line I read somewhere, that the intertubes allow like minded tribes to find each other. Some like-minded tribes are huge, and can find themselves in the conventional ways, work, church, at the VFW. Some like-minded tribes exist on little islands by themselves, alone, with noone around them who shares so much with them.

Some of you, some of us, are luckier than others, you are in academia or work for public interest groups, you have like-minded people around you in your day to day lives, but some of us, like me, are alone, and the formation of this tribe, the accidental coming together of this group, is a miracle to me and the first time in my life I have not felt alone and different from everyone around me. Seriously.

I need you all tonight, to share absolute joy and jubilation, its not just an election win, its world-shattering. I am present at history and glad you are present here with me.

@FlyingChainSaw: I had to talk down a friend about an hour ago, explaining that CNN was just filling time.

@ManchuCandidate: Crocodile tears, I Hope. I always want to believe in the inherent goodness in people, thus I keep thinking those Repugs know deep down in their icy hearts there is another Way…

@Promnight: I love you! And you gave me some of the most distressing agita I’ve ever had.

On CNN: Geez crew sees no path to victory.

@nabisco: That’s “why’d he”.

@JNOV: We busted out the Trader Joe’s “sparkling white wine from France” and it’s pretty good.

@FlyingChainSaw: FCS, I will pitch a tent under an overpass, I will walk, I will be there thats all I know.

UnReal Virginia is turning ‘Ginnie Blue. Barry has very tiny lead in VA.

@JNOV: I have family living in the District and known-knowns in various parts of VA. I will definitely be there, and may be able to provide a lift to my fellow stinqueros.

And I have to give some special love to nabisco who was willing to drive all the way to Philly to escort Jr and me to the polls. I don’t think my dad would even do that, and he lives down the road.

I have plenty of vacation saved and my work sched in Jan is usually quiet. I think I can attend.

@RomeGirl: I’m making, well, what’s the opposite of short work? I’m making long work of a bottle of wine myself and really need to step it up for the run-up to Hopey’s acceptance speech.

@Promnight: From another Stinquer adrift in corporationlandia, I am glad to share this moment with you.

Also for this weekend’s Sunday dinner Mr. Pedo concocted home-made sourdough with roasted garlic and sundried tomatoes. I upped the ante with a crustless quiche type thing with kale, butternut squash, the leftover roasted garlic, and caramelized onions. And a bit of goat cheese. With a salad of microgreens and herbs, balsamic-marinated heirloom tomatoes and shallots, and some nice ripe avocado. It was very satisfying. I don’t consider that gourmet, every single thing was a simple thing that we’ve just lost the art for in the microwage.

FUCKING MSNBC! They just flashed that Obama had 260 EC votes, and then it went to 207. Are they trying to kill me?

@Promnight: I will call the Harrington in the morning. It is such a horrific fleabag in some ways, everyone discounts it as a hotel.

@JNOV: aww. If I had known there was the chance to visit Ben’s shitter, I would have done more than just offer!

Flippin texts from Grant Park…

Finally in, and it’a a total sea of people. Can barely see the stage, so will mostly be watching the jumbotron like everyone else.

@nojo: Nojo, tell him he will get a beer for every photograph of Victory Pestorking he delivers to to the Stinquotron!

@JNOV: There’s no more need for agita, JNOV, I love you too.

Did anyone, anyone, think before this you would see a black president of the US? In your life? Obama broke through something, the polling is showing it. He broke through, THIS IS THE DREAM MLK HAD! I always hated those who said if you are white, you are inherently racist and can never overcome it, I am crying, and not because a democrat won, because a black man won, its the most hopeful, positive thing I have ever seen happen in my country in my life.

I am crying at the very thought of all this means, that every black child growing up now, will have a fucking role model to end all role models, that everyone in America, FUCKING EVERYONE, for the first time in our history, can truly believe, that they can be judged not by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. Yes, I know, Obama is a man, I am turning him into a symbol, but goddamit, we need this symbol now.

The civil war never really ended, it just turned into a civil cold war. Both parties continued to use it for the last 150 years. Tonight, the Civil war finally ended.

Now Reconstruction can really begin.

I have never been so prooud to be an american.

@mellbell: Honey, I’m on my second bottle of vino and Rome Boy has run out of tonic. We’re just waiting for the bar to open now.

@Promnight: We will be having fresh-baked croissants and other assorted delectable French pastries with our champers for b-fast.

@nabisco: Yeah — I love his shitter! It was nice to go to Old City today and just feel the ghosts. They used to let you touch the Liberty Bell back when I was a kid, but the oil from people’s fingers was damaging it — this big-ass cast-iron bell couldn’t deal with the kids running their wee fingers over the crack, so now it’s behind a barrier. Any time you and the family want to come to Philly, let me know. I’m not the most knowledgeable tour guide, but I’d be happy to roam with y’all.

@JNOV: That’s the one thing I like about Harvard — they still let you rub John Harvard’s toe for good luck.


I should clear this with the Family first, but hell yeah!

@Pedonator: Thats savoir vivre, making something fantastic, better than what the elites pay $100 for, out of simple things, I love kale, roasted onions, caramelized onions, are one of the simple delights of life, and they do so wonderfully mix with a pungent cheese, I know by what you described I am speaking to someone with the same heart I have about these things. My worship is to savor what the world, and life, give me, I prefer kale to endive, braised cabbage is a delight, living life fully and enjoying the fiinest does not require lobster and truffles, it requires only care and love for the fruits of the earth.

@mellbell: Oh, gosh, no, I asked a lady to take victory pestorking pictures?

@mellbell: I always knew teh Masters of teh Universe had a toe fetish!

@FlyingChainSaw: FCS, I would flop anywhere, but don’t rush, I have my princess and my son, who has been such an obama supporter, he will remember this inaugural for the rest of his life. 8 years old, he will tell you whu he prefers Obama’s health plan, compromise that it is, if you ask him.

I’m so glad I’ve been a small part of this group through these months of agony. Sometimes it’s been like having teeth pulled. Tonight makes it all worthwhile. I’m still dreaming that my state of Indiana can somehow come out with PRESIDENT-ELECT OBAMA on top. That will be the icing on this cake.

Thanks to everyone here for being the loud talkative family I never had.

@Promnight: Mr Cyn has been playing MLK’s speech from the march on DC, and we’re both crying. Free at last!

SD and CO both defeated draconian anti-abortion measures.

@Promnight: “There’s no question that in the next thirty or forty years a Negro can also achieve the same position that my brother has as President of the United States, certainly within that period of time,” said Attorney General Robert F. Kennedy in 1968.


The Voice of America beamed his extemporaneous remarks to more than sixty countries through thirty-nine radio transmitters. Translations were superimposed in the delivery of the talk to thirty-seven language areas.

Consistent with a Voice of America policy of acknowledging the worst in
the news as well as the bright side, Mr. Kennedy began by citing the
attack by whites on Negroes in Alabama in the last two weeks.

“It’s a matter that disturbs us tremendously,” he declared.

“But I think that people should also understand some of the good things
that are being done in this area, that this doesn’t really represent the
American people or the American Government, that this is just a small
minority group which is causing these problems and difficulties.

“It doesn’t represent the vast majority of people in the South, this kind
of riot, this kind of lawlessness, and it certainly doesn’t represent the
feelings of the United States Government or the American people. That is why we took the steps that we took to try to prevent it, and we have
prevented it.”

Last part of Flippin’s message (relayed via HF) took a moment for me to understand: Apparently cell traffic is a tad busy, so reports might be spotty.

@mellbell: That would be the one thing I like, too. It’s been hard getting over Obama’s Harvard JD (he should have gone to Stanford!), but yeah. I can play through that.

@Promnight: Our 8 y.o.s need to get together while we sip good wine and smoke Cohibas.

Prof. Charles Ogletree on the Daily Show is fuckin hilarious! Anyone watching this?

Would Pat Buchanan just fucking die already, please?

Sorry. Internet problems in the Windy City. So stoked though.

@nabisco: Only if we stick a little something special in those cohibas, now that would be a yuppie blunt!

I’m guessing CNN will call the election for Obama in 8 min when the polls close on the W coast. California, Oregon, Washington = over the top!

@Jamie Sommers: Followed by Wilmore and Wyatt Cenac double-teaming. Cenac Attack!

Geezer has a 10 point early lead in Az and the marriage prop is winning. Looks like we’re going to lose the shine we got being the first state to defeat it two years ago.

@JNOV: Him and all of his are dying a little inside, its a good thing.

Florida looks like its kooky self tonight, according to CNN’s map anyway. 83% reporting, 51-49 Obama-McCain. Did Sarah Silverman v-blog in vain?

Hey, I am sitting out in my miserable shed, my man cave, where I can smoke my cheap cigars, no TV. somebody tell me if anyone is fixing to concede.

Anyone want to toast? To Liberte, Equalite, Fraternite?

Daily Show calls Virginie for the Unicorn.

Get the cigar cutters out. “Important calls” to come at the top of the hour.

Fox, NPR – VA for the Eagle. FLA looking good.

So, anyone looking at entering public service in an Obama administration? I know two Richardson staffers here in New Mexico who are freaking out. One even sent me a resume so I can talk to the lt gov/new gov for her. Mrs RML and I have discussed it.

@nojo: Virginia is for lovers of Barack Obama!!

@Pedonator: Try using baked butternut squash as the crust for quiche. My latest favorite is halving acorn or buttercup squash, remove the seeds, use foil to get the halves to sit and fill with savory custard and greens topped with Fontina cheese, bake it slow 325 until set and tender. Also good filled with sweet egg custard flavored with orange flower water.

I’m having trouble staying awake. I am nervous about this one. Not only because of the threats Obama and his family will get. I was hoping the win margin would be wider. And I’m getting really annoyed at all the race talk.

Thank you, Bill Bennett, for alerting me to the extreme humility that marked McCain’s decision to run for president. He could’ve stayed put in the Senate, but that would’ve just been too easy, bless his soul.

@Promnight: I would but – ahem – domestic tranquility and all.

@Promnight: skoal, salud and prost, my friend. We all raise a glass (I’ve got the champers on ice for the missus).

@redmanlaw: Sign me up, been outta the game for 5 years, whats the chances?

President Elect Obama!! Opening the Veuve…

NPR just called it for the Unicorn.

Thank you American Voters, I can now believe in the US again.

Thank you Stinquers for sharing. We haz HOPE!

Our nation has looked into the abyss and turned away.

I just realized something….

If we pick up 58 seats in the Senate, you know whos’ dick the Democrats will have to suck for 4 more years?

Joe Liebermans, that’s who.

It’s like a curse…the Lieberman curse….

Avenge us, Unicorn! Their heads in nooses on January 21!

Oh, and on a brighter note?

I love you guys. Congratulations.

I cannot wipe the smile off my face, and probably will not be able to do so for days.

@becominginvisible: That sounds delicious, thank you!

@mellbell: McCain is That One who doesn’t know his place.

My neighborhood is going crazy. People are honking horns. Fireworks are being set off. Dogs barking!

Yes we can!!!!!!

We heard it on the Daily Fuckin Show , how apropriatie! Congrats Stinqueros, we lurv you alll!!!!

The whole world is watching. I am crying.



Check this out – even Fox News concedes.

Look at the index page feature graphic.

@Jamie Sommers: When have you last experienced such a reaction on the election of a president? I have no recollection in all my 56 years.

AP Reports McCain has Conceded!! Woo Woo!!

@Tommmcatt Yet Again: Yes, the Liebchen is the eternal problem.

But right now I have to go downstairs and hug Mr. Pedo and sit by the fire and eat a great dinner which will no doubt be filled with liberal elite ingredients and say, “YAAAAAAAAY!”

And, because I’m not above petty vengeance, “Suck it Geez and your chingacabra followers, your time is over, we’re in charge now!”

If only I could believe that “we” were really “in charge”.

@Jamie Sommers: When have you last seen such a reaction at the election of a president? I don’t recall any in my 56 years.

Come celebrate in the new thread appropriately titled, “President Barack Obama.”

The inauguration, my tribe, the inauguration, a moment in world history, its worth any inconvenience and expense, we owe it to our children and ourselves, how can you not be there, and as many of us can be there, we must be there together, the inauguration.

Somebody tell me if anyone is gonna speak, I am slugging champaign now, someone tell me so I can run inside.

How can we do a virtual mass CLINK of our glasses?

@AARPrick: WordPress brainfart and my impatience results in duplication of comments.

Mr. Pedo has been watching the Spanish-language coverage, switching between Univision and Galavision. Just went down to give the terrorist fist-bump with him and he says, “It’s not enough that Obama won, I want to see McCain’s loser speech.”

@AARPrick: Never. I’m amazed … and I’m only about 5 miles from McCain HQ.

@Promnight: CLINK!

Ok I had to eat something and it happened to coincide with McCain’s concession speech. I’m crying now, not from him, though at least he was honorable about it, but I can’t stop crying now because I’m so happy and grieving, not that I should be grieving for the last 8 years, but it seems like something might finally change…check back with me next year when I’ll be railing against the Unicorn but for right now I’m incredibly happy.

Also it’s past 8pm now in CA, so we should start to get results from the infernal initiatives.

“An African-American family will live in the White House.” Words fail.

I haven’t had time to read through everything, but weighing in to say CALI BROUGHT IT HOME, BABIEZ!!!!1!!!

Snot is running on my face, I’m crying so hard.

PG had a pretty klassy concession speech. Need to go blow my nose before the Unicorn comes out to to talk.

thank you to all of you for keeping me sane in the past year or 18 months in our various homes.

@Promnight: CHEERS!!!! OMG I am so fucking stoked! Oh shit awesome awesome awesome! Okay gotta get back to my party I love you guys!! YAYAAAYYY!!

I’m hating on my fellow Californicators right now, just from a 9% reporting on the 8 initiative on CNN. I want to believe everything is great, we’re gonna have a Unicorn in charge, but I reserve the right to return to Cynic status if the 8 initiative passes with more than a 2-3% margin. Shit, I work with these people, it’s hard to believe they would do that to me.

I’m glad I could do what I could to help Nevada turn blue. Good job to you in NM, RML.

MSNBC reporting from the celebration in Kenyan village of Obama’s dad.

@Promnight: Tomorrow I will book my flight to DC for the inauguration. After I finish a couple of personal things, I will start planning the Stinquey Inaugural Ball. Mellbell, I’m counting on you to help me with this.

Fuck – Grant park looks like a German rock festival turning out for Metallica.

Hey Hey Hey

@SanFranLefty: Thank you for your service to the cause. Even if (when?) the bigots rule in our own state of the promised land, I’m glad to count you among the friendlies (as opposed to the famblies?).

Jeebus fucking Doggamn, I wanna be there for the inaugural.

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