Nobody Could Have Predicted …

In today’s episode of NCHP, we once again find the Bush administration hard at work hiding shit that we’re supposed to know about:

The Treasury Department has hired three outside firms this week to help administer its $700 billion, taxpayer-funded bailout of troubled banks. But some key details of those contracts remain a mystery.

The agreements with Bank of New York Mellon Corp. and Simpson Thacher & Bartlett LLP that the Treasury Department posted on its web site each had blacked-out paragraphs in the sections dealing with compensation.

Keep in mind, fellow Stinquers, that the costs of the accountants, law firms, and bankers that will be cleaning up after the Bush administration’s administration of our economy will be over and above what cash we’re injecting into the banks and insurance companies we now own.

More on this latest outrage after the jump.

Nobody could have predicted that the Bush administration would be sneaky and secretive:

When the Treasury Department’s bailout czar provided an update this week on the government’s $700 billion plan to rescue troubled financial institutions, he vowed that it would be an “open and transparent program with appropriate oversight.”

The next day, the Treasury Department put out an announcement about a major bailout-related contract with Bank of New York Mellon Corp. that [also] fell short in the transparency department.

C’mon, really?

The copy of the agreement that was made public had blacked-out paragraphs in the section covering Bank of New York Mellon’s compensation. If the Treasury Department is unwilling to disclose the particulars of that — or even the general outline of the compensation scheme — that raises questions about how it will treat disclosure of other bailout transactions.

Once again I am tempted to grab a pitchfork and a torch and take to the streets.  Fucking rapist banker fucks.


(Insert “shocked, shocked” pun here.) Oversight sucks! Compensation rules!

I told y’all a month ago to buy pitchfork manufacturing stocks.

How dare you question the judgment of the very banker eelights who got the whole fucking world into this mess?

Have you no shame or sympathy for the break up of shallow relationships built on the size of one’s wallet?

Do you not feel when the eelights have to return their Ferraris or sell off their summer homes?

Can’t you shed tears when you read about billionaires who are now mere millionaires?

No? All right then. Carry on.

Blogenfreude, you bring the pitchforks; I’ll bring the guillotines. Aux armes, citoyens/ennes!

I don’t have a pitchfork, so my compost aerator will have to do. Seems appropriate somehow.

@Prommie: Available only on the Peking Exchange.

@redmanlaw: he he. Meanwhile, someone from Texas (who’da thunk it?) is mailing fake anthrax to every Chase bank branch in the US. If the anthrax terrorist taught us one thing, its that you simply cannot be traced if you toss stuff in a post office mailbox. Completely risk-free terrorism.

@Prommie: but, but … Preznit Bunnypants has kept us safe from another attack!


The clerk, in letting Scrooge’s nephew out, had let two other people in. They were portly gentlemen, pleasant to behold, and now stood, with their hats off, in Scrooge’s office. They had books and papers in their hands, and bowed to him.

‘Scrooge and Economy’s, I believe,’ said one of the gentlemen, referring to his list. ‘Have I the pleasure of addressing Mr Scrooge, or Mr Economy?’

‘Mr Economy has been dead these eight years,’ Scrooge replied. ‘He died eight years ago, this very night.’

‘We have no doubt his liberality is well represented by his surviving partner,’ said the gentleman, presenting his credentials.

‘It certainly was, for they had been two kindred spirits. At the ominous word liberality, Scrooge frowned, and shook his head, and handed the credentials back.

‘They are. Still,’ returned the gentleman,’ I wish I could say they were not.’

‘The Oak Room and the Palm Court are in full vigour, then?’ said Scrooge.

‘At this festive season of the year, Mr Scrooge,’ said the gentleman, taking up a pen, ‘it is more than usually desirable that we should make some huge provision for the extraordinarily wealthy and trustifarians, who suffer greatly at the present time. Perhaps a couple thousand are in want of common necessaries like $12,000 rounds of golf; about 2% of the population are in want of common comforts like private jets, sir.’

‘Are there no Luxury Resorts?”

‘Plenty of Luxury Resorts,’ said the gentleman, laying down the pen again.

‘And the massive tax breaks and low capitol gains taxes.’ demanded Scrooge. ‘Are they still in operation?’

‘Both very busy, sir.’

‘Oh. I was afraid, from what you said at first, that something had occurred to stop them in their useful course,’ said Scrooge. ‘I’m very glad to hear it.’

‘Under the impression that they scarcely furnish Christian cheer of mind or body to the fat cats,’ returned the gentleman, ‘a few of us are endeavoring to raise a fund to buy the Rich some Kobe Beef and 100-Year Old Congnac, and means of warmth, like mink-lined testicle warmers and high colonics. We choose this time, because it is a time, of all others, when Want is keenly felt. What shall I put you down for?’

‘About 700 trillion and change’ Scrooge replied.

‘You wish to be anonymous?’

‘I wish to be left alone,’ said Scrooge. ‘Since you ask me what I wish, gentlemen, that is my answer. I don’t have enough money to make merry myself at Christmas and I can’t afford to make my family merry. I help to support the establishments I have mentioned-they cost enough; and those who make more money than God must stick with that.’

‘Many can’t stick with that; and many would rather die than live less like Royalty.’

‘If they would rather die,’ said Scrooge, ‘they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population, or perhaps the the taxpayers should buy them face-lifts, that might cheer them up…”

@Tommmcatt Yet Again:

The three ghosts to visit Scrooge?
The Ghost of Fortunes Past
The Ghost of Smaller Fortunes Present
The Ghost of Fortunes Lost


“I built these chains with the junk mortgage bundles I forged in life…”

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment