Kill Bill

While Palin looks around and wanders aimlessly, wondering how al-Qaida attacked the stock exchange.

Tonight, we are all Freddy Rumsen (at least I will be, but without pissing one’s pants part.)

Meanwhile, the multiple hamsters at clerk.house.gov are mercilessly murdered by users trying to figure out who voted yea or nay so we can figure out who to unleash the fury on. Including myself.

Ah, god. Here we go….

To cheer you all up:

Palin Quote Genenator

Cold comfort, I know, but what can you do?

Yay panic! Work is boring today, and I need the lulz. And my 401k is a tupperware box full of change, so I’m long on sober and short on analysis.

We live in interesting times. The pubbies votes started to indicate that they were renegging on their agreement to vote for the bill with the dems, so dems started voting against it too. But the DOW was cratering from the git go anyway. Chibu, this is why I asked earlier, if the financial industry tanks before it passes, do they pass it anyway, by way of closing the barn door, as it were?

Anyway, silly republicans, thought you were gonna pin public blame for an unpopular but necessary bailout on the dems, did you? Ooops, now the dems get to blame the very real and actually-happening evaporation of the public’s retirement accounts and savings on you, gee, wonder which one gets the public more riled, bailouts they kinda don’t like, or all their money disappearing?

Oh, and Mukasey appointed a special prosecutor to investigate US Attorney-Gate. Yay! We’ll get to see that home-schooled blonde jebuser-attorney again, though I am sure the investigation will go no higher. But still, an interesting news day so far!

Economy fall down, go boom.

@Tommmcatt Yet Again: “More troops for healthcare reform” is an early favorite.

@mellbell:

It has been overwhelming to me that confirmation of who’s more apt to be talking about solutions so we don’t have to be takers from federal government.

-Fake Sarah Palin

@blogenfreude: No, stock markets fall down go boom. Important difference. The price of gas and a loaf of bread haven’t materially changed today. But ask again tomorrow.

Republican leaders loudly blaming Pelosi for making them vote against the Bailout, blaming dems for failure of the Bill they killed! My Head Explodes.

@Prommie: My head is hurting. Seriously

Republican Leaders say Pelosi’s speech hurt their widdle feelings, so they decided to kill America in spite. Then blame the democrats.

No, really, republicans say Pelosi’s speach hurt their feelings and thats why they voted against the Bill. Because they were offended by something Pelosi said this morning, so they killed the bailout.

Scattered fragments of my head are now re-exploding.

From TPM:

Late Update: Now Rep. Blunt is blaming the Jewish Holidays. Are there enough Republican Jews in the House to make that credible?

I FINALLY got access to the roll call:

http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2008/roll674.xml

In Georgia, only Sanford Bishop and Jim Marshall, both fairly conservative Dems, voted yes. The entire GOP representative body and three other Dems voted no — and that included two of the safest Democratic seats in the state, civil rights lion John Lewis and Cynthia McKinney slayer Hank Johnson.

Sorry SFL, I don’t know how to pull out all 50-something of your folks.

Can’t process, doesn’t make sense, ctrl+alt+del

Ahhhh, here we go:
I think, with Ahmadinejad, personally obsessive partisanship and they are our next door neighbor.
-Fictional Sarah Palin

This really brightens up my day, except that I know it was voted down for all the wrong reasons. And since “everyone” seems to agree that a massive transfer of wealth from taxpayers to Wall St. is necessary right away to avoid a credit market meltdown, we can predict that what eventually passes (tomorrow? Thursday, just in time for the veep debate?) will be much worse, with even more ludicrous give-aways to the haves from the have-nots.

So, what are we going to use for protection money when the hedge fund enforcers come knocking on the door next year, demanding their Trillion$+ payoff?

I’ll say it again, let the finance “industry” fail. It doesn’t add anything of value to our economy. It’s years or decades since it served its legitimate purpose of raising capital for industries that actually make things, and since at least the mid-90’s it’s been nothing more than a Ponzi scheme.

I don’t buy for one second that if we let it fail we’re all gonna be jobless and homeless in a matter of days, googling for recipes on how to stretch manburger helper for a family of four.

@rptrcub: Wait a minute, if your link is correct, this is how the bill was described:

To amend the Internal Revenue Code of 1986 to provide earnings assistance and tax relief to members of the uniformed services, volunteer firefighters, and Peace Corps volunteers, and for other purposes

“And for other purposes” is how we describe a $700B bailout?

It’s terrifying how beside the point the cash for trash scheme is. Nowhere is anyone talking about re-establishing underwriting quality as a keystone of financial markets, or even hinting that anything besides a plain vanilla note (25% down, prime+ rate) should be outlawed as proven toxic paper. Underwriting quality was completely abandoned at origination and securitization stages. Unless that is reformed, we’ll have to pour on another $700 billion in 10 years. We were all well warned what was in the cards in 1989-1991 during the last credit-craze fueled crash. Then we just blew up the US banks. To a certain extent, if the European end up in the drink, I could not care less. They could read the trade journals and the monographs coming from the big investment houses back then, too, that showed the nearly complete abandonment of underwriting discipline. Nothing changed as far as I can tell on the mortgage origination side after the last crash, so the Europeans had every warning that the American mortgage paper was all crap.

Now I’m just waiting for someone to say something sexy so I can make a joke about the “DEVELOPING HARD” line up there.

Let’s leave the “should they / shouldn’t they bail Wall Street out” thing to the side. The Republicans are not blaming the Democrats. They are blaming Nancy Pelosi. These are two very different things.

Democrats are the party of Not Bush. Pelosi is the party of San Francisco liberals. This works for them, every single fucking time. It is annoying as fuck, but it’s true. This is not the gambit they are using in an attempt to duck responsibility for the stock market crash. This is the gambit they use for EVERYTHING.

@FlyingChainSaw:
But how can a banker afford a summer home then?

Why won’t someone please think of the bankers?!?

@Pedonator: So since I’m a former Peace Corps volunteer, this $700 billion was coming to me? And…and now it’s not? Damn you, lawmakers!

@ManchuCandidate: Easy. They won’t be paying for the price inflation that pandemic abandonment of underwriting discipline engenders. Prices will start making sense when every house isn’t a chip in a casino.

@chicago bureau:
Yes, it’s all Nancy’s fault (and Barney Frank’s) because teh gheyz are responsible for the financial meltdown. My favorite quote:
“Center for Immigration Studies Executive Director Mark Krikorian at the National Review’s website pushes a similar theme, this time focusing on Friday’s failure of WaMu. Krikorian suggests the big bank failed because it was too accommodating to minorities, including gays, African-Americans and Hispanics.”
(H/T to rptrcub).

I don’t think the “A vote for the bailout is a vote for San Francisco values” meme will work this time for them. And looking at how the California delegation voted, the “no” votes were from the most liberal and most conservative House members.

@FlyingChainSaw: But from what I can see (picking through the hysteria and deliberate obfuscation wielded by high-finance “captains of industry” and their media whores to create a crisis that demands us to hand over our lunch money right now), poor underwriting at the mortgage origination stage has only a small part to do with the true problem. Foreclosure rates are high by historical standards, but not outrageously high, not enough to take down the entire financial system on their own.

It’s the securitization part that got WAY out of hand. Once you have securities thrice-or-more removed from anything tangible nobody knows what they hell they are securing anymore.

The actual houses and individual mortgages that were originally securitized can’t even be identified anymore. That’s another reason this cash for trash scheme is beside the point.

@chicago bureau: I agree, demonizing San Francisco for its association with Pelosi is truly despicable.

@SanFranLefty: No offense to your gravatar, I just don’t for one minute believe that Nancy represents San Francisco Liberals. They grow liberals really liberal in San Francisco, am I right? If Nancy really started representin’, the wingnuts’ heads would explode.

@flippin eck: It’s like the FDA rules for listing ingredients on food label, by proportion of the total food product. So the soldiers and firefighters were gonna get about $400B, Peace Corps and Teach for America around $200B, and the other purposes/investment bankers are just those incidental fillers like natural and artificial flavors, ascorbic acid, xanthan gum, etc.

@Pedonator: Yes, but that is the nature of the creature, once you start abstracting out risk like that it only take a few keystones to tumble to cause systemic failure. Fundamentals slide enough to put the value of all these securities into question and then they are just market-priced trash looking for the craziest rag man in the place to buy them. Mortgage-backed securities would not have flown as high or blown up as broadly had origination underwriting been well disciplined. You don’t get it wrong at the beginning and right at the end.

When there’s a boom going on, FCS, everyone has equity, its like you can spot everyone a 25% downpayment, if they don’t have that much equity today, they will next year, yippee, no doc jumbos for everyone! A mormon mortgage broker’s paradise.

@Pedonator: Nancy’s never been as liberal as she’s caricatured to be. And my city isn’t as liberal as it used to be, what with all the yuppie in-fill condos, and immigrant populations who are fairly conservative. Then again, Mayor McDreamy is considered conservative, and the president of the Board of Supervisors is a member of the Green Party.

Well, I think I’ll just duck out to do my laundry, and…

JEEZUS CHRIST WHAT’S GOING ON THIS TIME.

Folks, it’s not even October yet. Please give each crisis a little room to breathe before rushing in with the next.

Both my future senator, Rep. Tom Udall (D-NM3) and his opponent Rep. Steve Pearce (R. Pendejo) voted against the bill. “No blank check for Wall Street,” screams the newest entry in the RML inbox.

@Prommie: Oh, I know the game. It’s exactly the logic behind the ‘silent second’, an ancillary and usually illegal inside loan used to create the illusion of a downpayment. All goes to the same place – galloping price inflation that leaves communities and economies in shambles when the whole clusterfuck flies off the cliff.

@SanFranLefty: Where in DC are you staying and for how long will you be here?

PsychoGeezer’s next ten campaign stunts.

@Mellbell: You can find me at sanfranlefty [at] gmail

Not Amy Winehouse’s
Stocks are a Losing Game

For you I wasn’t a name
Stocks are a losing game
Eight figure home for you came
Stocks are a losing game

One I wish I never played
Oh what a mess we made
And now the final frame
Stocks are a losing game

Played out like the fool
Stocks were a salesman’s tool
More than I could stand
Stocks are a losing hand

Self professed… profound
Till the chips were down
…know you’re a gambling man
Stocks are a losing hand

Not for the sane of mind
Stocks are a fate resigned
Memories mar my mind
Stocks are a fate resigned

Over rigged odds
And laughed at by the gods
And now the final frame
Stocks are a losing game

WTF, I go out for smokes and the party gets moved? Thank FSM SFLefty had my number, I’d have been wandering around the unsafe streets at night for HOURS!

So, what’d I miss?

Oh. right. Everything’s fucked. OK, well, looks like I’m up to speed, then.

@RomeGirl: We sent out search parties, but then we had to send out search parties for them.

@nojo:

Then I ate Nojo out of sheer starvation, but he didn’t sit well, so up he came! After that, naps.

@nojo: They went into Palin World and got et by the dinosaurs. A little change in the diet from caveman.

@blogenfreude: Trenchant!

Meanwhile, in Ohio…

“I’ve never been afraid of stepping in to solve problems for the American people, and I’m not going to stop now,” McCain told a rally in Columbus, Ohio.

If it sounds odd — he delivered that gem before the vote.

Um, Senator, I can wipe my own ass, but thanks for the offer. Now get the fuck out of my bathroom.

L’shana tova to our Jewish cynic stinquers. And for your enjoyment, Sarah Silverman begging young Jews to do the “Great Schlep” to Florida to get their grandparents to vote for Barack.

@ManchuCandidate: And as I read your ditty, a flock of literal loonies (the actual birds) flew overhead in a check-mark pattern.

@SFL: No prob. It’s my duty to point out such bullshit. My reax are slow this evening due to the fact that I don’t have the interwebs at my home right now due to Comcast crap. Using wifi at the apt complex poolside.

As someone whose employment depends on my boss being able to get loans to pay for inventory, I’m nervous as hell. And my retirement account lost another $5k.
“Hi, my name is Cynica. Welcome to Wal-Mart.”

@SanFranLefty: The October surprise is that he will admit he is the father of Bristol’s child and marry her, putting to rest forever the rumors that he is too old and too riddled with cancer to serve as president.

@Mistress Cynica: I’m working up food porn recipes for Hobo Stew and such.

@Promnight: Hobo is a little too gamey for my taste, Baby Stew, now we’re talking.

@drinkyclown: The jebusers will provide an ample supply, after abortion and birth control are banned. I see a way to use these “safe haven” laws, you know, where you can drop off unwanted infants (these laws were passed in an effort to stem the growing tide of promnightdumpsterbabies), could be used to good effect, turning unwanted infants into a supply of high-quality, and very tender and delicious, protein. Soylent Green is Babies! Swift would be gratified.

@Promnight: “It’s not so modest now, is it, suckah!”

@Promnight: What is this I’ve heard? Real life has gotten in the way of the DE Valley Stanky party this Thursday?

@SanFranLefty: Road trip to DC, then? Are you and Mellbell getting together?

/breaking – Winning Powerball ticket sold in NM! RML’s ticket for Saturday’s drawing matches . . . one number. Booking Metallica and Radiohead for Prommie’s Thursday bash now off (the real reason it was cancelled).

@Promnight: Just heard today that Oregon is having a problem with people dropping off their unwanted older children — seems the safe haven law here isn’t restricted to babies. A guy just dumped his NINE children at hospital after his wife died and he felt he couldn’t take care of them (the state has placed them with relatives willing to help, but talk about a lifetime of abandonment issues). Seriously, I’m afraid it will get worse as the economy craters. A lot of people put their kids in orphanages during the depression.

@undercoverother: Sobriety (don’t worry, its only a temporary 9 to 5 thing for me) got in the way. Can’t disrupt life to that extent for the first VP debate, but election night, inauguration, thats worthy. We should be talking preparation for a self-sufficient commune, people. I’ve been a carpenter, can do plumbing, get a lister-diesel powered generator we can power on corn oil, I can keep one of those running, we need some agricultural expertise big time. We’ll need 2 years supply of rice, beans, oil, masa, to bide us over till we get going, we should be buying now. The dark ages are coming.

@Promnight: Right! We could feed ’em to the growing tide of homeless people and Bam! Two problems solved, right there. And I was thinking we could just feed the homeless to each other, this works way better. Thank you, Jeebus!

@Mistress Cynica: Newt Gingrich was big in favor of orphanages, he had a solution to inner city poverty that resembles the australian approach toward aborigines in the 50s and 60s. He liked to hold out Boys Town as a great model. He never mentioned that the most famous Boys Town alumnus was Charles Manson.

@Promnight: Really, Charles Manson was a Boys Town alum? How did I miss that? I need to say once again that I keep coming back here for many reasons, the main one being I learn so much from you all.

@flippin eck: Hey, me too. Where/when? They still owe me for all those intestinal bugs, so I’ll take my share in…euros? yen? yuan?
@Promnight: I would’ve come too but life is kinda adult for me now as well. Election night?

@Promnight: I can do election night and bring some AWESOME chicken enchiladas and a homemade apple pie! (I’m cross-cultural, y’all.) Just make me some gimlets, and I’ll be happy. And maybe undercoverotherJr can come, too?

@nabisco: Yes, election night!

@nabisco: /checking 6th grade science homework on the google

Election night, yes, I will not revoke this invite, election night this year will determine the future course of world history and is worth putting everything else in life on hold for 48 hours, and I am serious about this one, yes, election night, for those in this area, and if there is no broader, national stinky gathering, I will definitely host a Stinky cocktail party drunken festival that hopefully ends in wild celebration and if not, will at least allow us to commiserate in like-minded company, and to start the emigration plans together. The only contingency I will allow is that there might be a broader national or regional stinky convention.

@Promnight: I found that strange given that Larry King (the black guy who ran Franklin Savings) went away for bank fraud and, in the process of that trial, a lot of of the stuff about the boys being used as GOP toys spilled out. Gingrich probably digs it because he got a taste of the Boys Town wares.

@Mistress Cynica: My dear Cynica: Take deep breaths. Let the bad thoughts flow into the night. I can help show the way. If it happens to you, being out of work is not the end of the world, and you will survive. It just changes your perspective on the near-term prospects for long-term comfort, is all. In the end, if push comes to desperate shove, your education and experience put you a leg up on the competition, as long as you are not too proud to work beneath your supposed station. Oh, and start brushing up on your European language of choice. It might come in handy.

Being poor isn’t so bad, so long as you don’t mind the loss of social status. I was born poor, and never really have taken in the social consequences of relative wealth, I don’t really know if I would be devastated to be poor again. Imagine you are an undergrad, thats all. When everyone is poor, there’s no shame in it. My Mommie and Daddy were dirt poor during the depression, Angela’s Ashes type stuff, the funny thing about them was that instead of making them resolved to save and make money, instead, they never had any fear of poverty. Been there, done that. No big deal. If my dad had butter for his bread, he was completely happy. Apparently, when he was a child, butter was a luxury. Butter, that was living to him. Butter and eggs, these are easily doable staples on our commune. RML will provide fish and game birds, and teach others to do the same, we’ll eat like kings as society breaks down.

@Mistress Cynica: If you’d like, I can adopt you and then drop you off at an OR hospital. Maybe some nice fambly with a “Get US out of UN” sign in their front yard will adopt you.

@Ewalda: That becomes even more attractive, as I got turned down today for health insurance because I’m “outside the risk parameters.” Maybe Talibunny will declare on Canada so I can surrender.

@Ewalda: Remember the “U.S. Out of North America” stickers from the 80s?

@Mistress Cynica: Makes you want to get all “Hulk SMASH” about the things.

@redmanlaw: Yes, those were cool, in their own way. The Birchers’ UN signs, on the other hand, are definately very uncool.
I still have my “U.S. out of my Uterus” bumper sticker somewhere. It just never seemed to be correct for my car, though I fully supported the message in theory. To see a guy getting out of a Uterus car dilutes the message, so to speak. Guess “U.S. Out Of My Scrotum” wouldn’t have packed as much punch…..

@Promnight: It’s like that worldwide run on rice at the Costco not too long ago.

@Ewalda: Mr. SFL would totally put a “U.S. out of my Scrotum” sticker on his Subaru station wagon (official lesbian vehicle). It will look nice next to our “No on Prop. 8” and various Unicorn stickers.

@Mistress Cynica: That fucking blows about the insurance. Is there a Starbucks in your town? Seriously, I have known several professionals who weren’t covered at work take part-time barista gigs to get the health insurance. And yes you’re right that the number of kids going in to foster care goes up during economic slumps – whether it’s because stressed out mom hits the kid, stressed out mom self-medicates with drugs and alcohol, or strapped for cash families end up being reported for neglect. Happens every time. Suddenly I have “It’s a Hard-Knock Life” running through my head. Hey U.S., welcome to the Third World!

@Promnight: And don’t get me started on Newt and the fucking orphanages. Boys Town or Cider House Rules, most definitely not. (Though Cider House Rules is one of my favorite books and I adore John Irving as one of the best living writers).

@SanFranLefty: Mr. SFL would totally put a “U.S. out of my Scrotum” sticker on his Subaru

Note to self: Reprioritize Stinque tchotchke shoppe a few notches up.

@SanFranLefty: I think there’s a Starbucks at the Safeway. Have to check into that. Also, I’ve been singing “We’d like to thank you, Herbert Hoover” for days now.

@Mistress Cynica: You crowd, you cramp, you’re still the champ…

First saw it in London, bought the cast album on returning home. Hated the movie. Hated the TV remake.

After today, I’m starting to be thankful that I don’t make enough money to save in a 401(k).

Yes, the drugs will be wearing off soon.

hey kids,
SFL, manchu and nojo found me wandering aimlessly around and herded me back here. i’ve been shell shocked, and just coming out of it.
anyone have any good revenge plots for Xmr. baked?
guess i’m not out of it yet.

cynica,
i’ve been kicked out of 3 health insurance co.’s in 3 years for ‘pre-existing conditions’. at my age, the only thing i HAVEN”T had yet is leprosy, which i’m expecting any day via Xfucktwit’s girlfriend.
just goes to show, i would have bet all my wall street protected money that he would never cheat on me.
oh right.

lefty,
the sarah silverman clip was a riot. my fave: they both wear track suits.
fun-eeeee. thanks for your diligent effort to bring me back to the living.
still forgetting to breathe sometimes, but i’m here…it’s a start.
love you too jnov…and i’m thankful for all the support i get from all of you. thanks all, truly.

@nojo: Was in it for 2 and a half years as a kid. Reading that lyric was like remembering a dream!

@baked: Welcome back! Sarah S. was brilliant. I loved the “This is Sarah…[pause]…Silverman” at the beginning.

@RomeGirl: I hope you are staying out of Italian courthouses. Or at least blogging about it!

@baked: Yeah, another Stinquer! Celebrate with six parts of brandy with one part of creme de menthe, dash of bitter bitter lime juice to taste!

@nabisco: Stingahs!

@Prommie: It’s only appropriate that we adopt an Official Drink for the ark/commune, although barrels of rum añejo would keep much better than mixers.

@baked: The Trick is to Keep Breathing.

@baked:
My only advice is to not let it become an obsession. I don’t want to see you with one leg and a beard, tied to Xbaked while getting all stabby with a harpoon.

Been there, done that. It didn’t help.

Just live well.

@nabisco: Silly, I’ve been nannering on ad nauseum lately about my PC country since it suddenly entered the average American’s consciousness this summer: Georgia. No peaches, lots of outhouses…and now with special bonus Russian troops! As to the intestinal bug thing, I had at least 3 bouts with giardia and scabies twice…that has to be worth a few mil from the bailout package!

@baked: So glad to see you — I was getting worried. As for revenge on Xmr, what could be worse punishment than losing the love, trust, and respect of a fantastic woman like you? Truly, sister, you are already avenged–no bunny boiling necessary.

Now we just need to track down Lyndon, Monk, Dodger, and who was the farmer? DaveH? We’re gonna need his skills.

@flippin eck: Thank you for your service. Wasn’t the parade upon your return enough?

@ y’all – Remember when I said once that there’s more than one way to serve your country? Flippin Eck and Nabeesco (and Lefty, Dodger, and everyone who has been or is engaged in public service/working in the public interest is walking the walk.

/off to the Promised Land for our autumn tribal feast day. See ya.

@flippin eck: Ah, a post-Cold War RPCV. I was in Guatemala in the bad old days of dictators and guerilla warfare; funniest Reagan-era deployment was the group of volunteers brought in to teach kids physical fitness. I mean, when you have a population that is illiterate and malnourished, what they really need are mad volleyball skills, right? They were very healthy, tho, so it helped out our party pool. Scabies?? Wow. I had giardia, typhoid, dengue (twice) and, um, crabs.

@nabisco: For a Cold War-era assignment in Central America, I would think physical fitness had less to do with volleyball and more to do with, well, guerilla bootcamp. They didn’t take the kids on a “field trip” to Nicaragua by any chance, did they? I keed, I keed, I’m sure you and your fellow volunteers were the same incorruptable, peace-loving, idealistic, naive kids that I was/served with, one generation removed.

Also, I would take several more bouts of scabies anyday over typhoid or dengue–FSM, that’s horrible! Georgia was no Posh Corps, but it also wasn’t too rough health-wise because we weren’t in a tropical or subtropical zone like 90% of PC countries. Our medical officer went to a PCMO conference and the other docs laughed at her b/c she had it so easy.

@flippin eck: We were peace-loving, hard-living, community organizers sandwiched in between warring ideologies. Weren’t allowed to work with cooperatives because that may have gotten us targeted by the paras (I did anyway). Nobody worked for the Agency far as I know, but I did have a memorable night seated next to this guy in a tourist bar, where he entertained prostitutes with war stories and coin tricks. He kept buying drinks, and none of my PC friends knew who he was at the time. My folks had his album when I was a kid, so I did.

@ManchuCandidate:
@Mistress Cynica:
what is the standard obsessional time frame, it’s been weeks and i’m still rending the hem of my garment. and staring at the ceiling.
we’ve all been there. we all snap out of it.
my latest revenge fantasy is messing up all his files. putting everything in the wrong place. it’s more funny than mean. waste a few of his hours like he wasted 10 years of my life. bitter much?
should i? good idea yes? harmless, well deserved revenge?

@baked: Oh, honey. Don’t do it. Rise above it. Six months from now you’ll be glad you did.

Of course, maybe if you find some good lovin’ for the night, that could help you snap out of things. (Always use protection, sez your den mama)

CB SHOOTS, HE SCORES!

Daily Show uses “Kill Bill” for its bailout coverage Tuesday night.

@nojo:
didn’t i just say the other day i had a creepy feeling they’re mining us?
too many coincidences.

@baked:
It will take a while to work it out of your system–the timeframe depends on you. Getting rid of the immediate anger takes a long time (or it did for me.) Takes longer to get rid of the subconscious anger.

Wanting revenge is normal, but it’s a short term gain with a lot of long term consequences.