“Speaking in Chantilly, Va., at Exhibit Edge, a female-owned firm that designs trade show exhibits and displays, the presumptive Republican nominee was surrounded by women. More than a dozen female business owners and entrepreneurs were invited to sit behind Romney at the event, putting them directly in the camera shot, while dozens of other women were seated in front of him.”

Mitt Romney targets female voters in Virginia [Yahoo]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv5TPx_m3-U

Our story begins, as all good stories do, with a Golden Retriever guarding his companion’s bike on a Chinese street. When the companion returns from his errands, he gets on the bike, the dog hops on the back — and then Li Li barks to signal that he’s ready to ride.

Followed by the sound heard ’round the Internet: Awwwwww.

But golly, that’s an awfully thin rack Li Li’s squatting on. So Jeff, an expat Midwesterner living in Bangkok, reposts the video and launches a website to raise money to buy him a proper platform.

Once more, with feeling: Awwwwww.

And then, the twist: YouTube pulls his video.

Say, what?

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Our guest plaintiff is Henry Wolf, who accuses the defendants of “Negligent Infliction of Emotional Distress”.

Plaintiff was riding his 1993 BMW motorcycle equipped with a Corbin-Pacific seat. The ride lasted approximately two hours each way to Plaintiff’s destination, after which Plaintiff developed a severe case of priapism (a persistent lasting erection). Plaintiff alleges that this condition was caused by the ridge-like seat on his motorcycle, negligently designed, manufactured and/or installed by defendants.

Plaintiff now suffers from priapism (a long lasting erection), and has been experiencing continuing problems since his motorcycle ride. He is now unable to engage in sexual activity, which is causing him substantial emotional and mental anguish. Plaintiff is distraught and distressed because of this. Defendants, and each of them, are liable to Plaintiff due the their negligent design, manufacture and/or installation of the seat on Plaintiff’s motorcycle.

Wolf v. BMW [PDF]

Uneasy Rider Sues BMW [Courthouse News Service, via Yahoo]

Lewis Lapham, “the famed former editor of Harper’s Magazine” — we much preferred the previous proto-Spy Michael Kinsley version — asks what we think is supposed to be a profoundly impertinent question:

Why then does it come to pass that the more data we collect — from Google, YouTube, and Facebook — the less likely we are to know what it means?

Personally, we don’t recall collecting any data from Google, YouTube, and Facebook, although we tend to visit all three in the course of our blogging and professional day. (What was that damn PHP lowercase function? Ah. Right.) We do collect data from — wait for it — databases, but that tends to be data we had a hand in storing to begin with. And, mirabile dictu, we do know what it means. It means the database is functioning.

But this, of course, is not what Famed Former Editor Lewis Lapham is getting at. After all, Famed Former Editor Lewis Lapham would not blow 3,318 words just to confirm that our programming works the way we intend it to. No, Famed Former Editor Lewis Lapham is making a point.

And God help us if we can’t figure out what it is.

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Miss Travel [via Know Your Meme]

The New Yorker’s George Packer frets about people who aren’t the New Yorker’s George Packer:

At bottom, the invented rituals that proliferate in our culture signify a disenchantment with modernity. If, like millions of Americans, you’re secular and the traditions of a church or temple have no hold on you, or if you’re assimilated and ethnic identity has faded away, then what is there to sustain you on the lonely path through a turbulent, rootless, uncertain world?

Our response is, how you say, conflicted.

What compels the New Yorker’s George Packer to bemoan Modern Society is — wait for it — a cupcake party. Apparently you get the secret news about your prenatal baby’s gender from the doctor, slip the baker a gratuity to cook the (still secret) information into pink or blue confections, and then invite all your friends to share your joy by simultaneously chowing down. It’s a girl! And it’s delicious!

And here we heartily agree with the New Yorker’s George Packer: Oh my fucking god, why are you dragging me through this? And why didn’t you hold a party to reveal your pregnancy test?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRgktzRvZ0

This is a frog sitting on a bench like a human. We are presenting a frog sitting on a bench like a human because the Bible has some definitive things to say about frogs, whether or not they are sitting on benches like humans.

What does the Bible have to say about sitting-on-a-bench-like-a-human-optional frogs? Things like “I will smite all thy borders with frogs” (Exodus 8:2). And “He sent divers sorts of flies among them, which devoured them; and frogs, which destroyed them” (Psalms 78:45). And “Their land brought forth frogs in abundance, in the chambers of their kings” (Psalms 105:30). And “I saw three unclean spirits like frogs come out of the mouth of the dragon, and out of the mouth of the beast, and out of the mouth of the false prophet” (Revelation 16:13).

You could say that the Bible offers very specific details about frogs, whether or not they choose to sit on benches like humans. And you would be correct.

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