Title: “Own Your Life: Living with Deep Intention, Bold Faith, and Generous Love”

Author: Sally Clarkson

Rank: 13

Blurb: “Do you ever long for days full of joy and energy — days that bring out the best version of you rather than leave you exhausted? Do you sometimes catch yourself wishing life was more impactful and fulfilling? In a world that’s moving so fast, it’s easy to lose your sense of purpose. So now is the time to make each moment of your ordinary, everyday, beautiful existence count. It’s time to own your life.”

Review: “The first time I ever came across Sally Clarkson was as a keynote speaker at a big homeschool conference about a decade ago!”

Customers Also Bought: “Make it Happen: Surrender Your Fear. Take the Leap. Live On Purpose.”

Footnote: Truth be told, there are some folks whom we wish lived with shallow intention and timid faith. Short of that, take away their guns.

Own Your Life [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “Illuminatiam: The First Testament Of The Illuminati”

Author: Illuminatiam

Rank: 32

Blurb: “Fear not for your war-stricken, poverty-ridden planet: help is on the way. The Illuminati’s path for humanity — our Universal Design — has spanned throughout centuries to safeguard the human species from extinction. As this age of War comes to an end, the new dawn will usher in a society where all people, in all places, can live in Abundance.”

About the Author: “The Illuminati is an elite collective of leaders, business authorities, and other influential members of this planet. The organization unites superiors of the world in an unrestrictive and private domain — free of political, religious, and geographical boundaries — to further the prosperity of the human species as a whole.”

Review: “This is where it gets weird.”

Customers Also Bought: “Freemason Logo – Square & Compass Symbol – Illuminati Men’s T-shirt Tee”

Footnote: We have a problem squaring a centuries-old secret society with a Twitter account.

Illuminatiam [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “Images You Should Not Masturbate To”

Authors: Graham Johnson and Rob Hibbert

Rank: 54

Blurb: “Temporarily out of stock”

Review: “Kindle edition took both hands.”

Customers Also Bought: “Rude Hand Gestures of the World”

Footnote: Feet.

Images You Should Not Masturbate To [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “Animals (Baby Touch and Feel)”

Author: DK Publishing

Rank: 100

Blurb: “With padded covers, simple images, and an amazing range of novelty textures, Baby Touch and Feel books immediately capture the attention of the very youngest children to create an experience they’ll want to repeat over and over again.”

Review: “THERE IS NOTHING TO TOUCH OR FEEL!”

Customers Also Bought: “Fisher-Price Laugh and Learn Click’n Learn Remote”

Footnote: We hear there’s a grownup version featuring Roger Daltrey.

Animals [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “Grumpy Cat 2015 Wall Calendar”

Author: Grumpy Cat

Rank: 61

Blurb: “Bonus page includes Sep-Dec 2014 overview.”

Review: “Looking forward to seeing Grumpy every day starting next year.”

Customers Also Bought: “Grumpy Cat Earbuds”

Footnote: Any time you think things can’t get any worse, just check the date.

Grumpy Cat 2015 Wall Calendar [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “The Motivation Manifesto”

Author: Brendon Burchard

Rank: 82

Blurb: “The Motivation Manifesto is a pulsing, articulate, ferocious call to claim our personal power. World-renowned high performance trainer Brendon Burchard reveals that the main motive of humankind is the pursuit of greater Personal Freedom. We desire the grand liberties of choice — time freedom, emotional freedom, social freedom, financial freedom, spiritual freedom. Only two enemies stand in our way: an external enemy, defined as the social oppression of who we are by the mediocre masses, and an internal enemy, a sort of self-oppression caused by our own doubt and fear.”

Review: “It’s a deep look at our inner psychology — what holds us back and how can we rewire our brains to break through our fears to live daily in a fully charged and inspired state.”

Customers Also Bought: “The 21-Day Consciousness Cleanse”

Footnote: If your only external enemy is social oppression by the mediocre masses, and not actual oppression by the armed and uniformed masses, what are you complaining about?

The Motivation Manifesto [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing”

Author: Marie Kondo

Rank: 68

Blurb: “With detailed guidance for determining which items in your house ‘spark joy’ (and which don’t), this international bestseller featuring Tokyo’s newest lifestyle phenomenon will help you clear your clutter and enjoy the unique magic of a tidy home — and the calm, motivated mindset it can inspire.”

Review: “My one quibble with her instructions has to do with folding. I’ve always disliked rolls of items.”

Customers Also Bought: “The Meaning of Human Existence” by Edward O. Wilson

Footnote: Or, as our Dad taught us, throw everything into a giant box and shove it into the garage.

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]