Cosa Nostradamus

Eyes Wide Shut.Title: “Illuminatiam: The First Testament Of The Illuminati”

Author: Illuminatiam

Rank: 32

Blurb: “Fear not for your war-stricken, poverty-ridden planet: help is on the way. The Illuminati’s path for humanity — our Universal Design — has spanned throughout centuries to safeguard the human species from extinction. As this age of War comes to an end, the new dawn will usher in a society where all people, in all places, can live in Abundance.”

About the Author: “The Illuminati is an elite collective of leaders, business authorities, and other influential members of this planet. The organization unites superiors of the world in an unrestrictive and private domain — free of political, religious, and geographical boundaries — to further the prosperity of the human species as a whole.”

Review: “This is where it gets weird.”

Customers Also Bought: “Freemason Logo – Square & Compass Symbol – Illuminati Men’s T-shirt Tee”

Footnote: We have a problem squaring a centuries-old secret society with a Twitter account.

Illuminatiam [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]


Would that be East Abundance or S. Abundance. You know visas are required in S. Abundance?
Ready to go as soon as POTUS lifts travel restrictions.

It is Abundance if you’re one of them. If not well suck it.

I’m tired.

I have a Book of Mormon Wikiquote tab open on Safari. I despair for my life.

But if any of you dear sweet funny people haven’t seen the David Lean version of Oliver Twist run don’t walk. Spectacular. We can go back to the Stinque coffee house to talk over the thinking behind Shylock’s nose – did it have to look like it had a separate zip code? and also the age of Nancy and a couple of questionable motivations – but OMG. Huge spectacle none of which was ‘created’ by dorks. And gorgeous storytelling retaining Dickens’s ‘hand of God’ use of coincidence.

@Benedick: You’re a Brit. Do you think that Prince Andrew was boinking teenage girls? The only reason I would say no is that I thought he was the ghey one. Or was that the younger royal brother? Or am I confusing the royal family with young not-gay Ron Reagan Jr. the ballet dancer? Andrew was boinking the red head and they had the princesses who get drunk and wear elaborate fascinators?

Regardless of Andrew York’s* involvement boinking said teenagers, I take the allegations that Jeffrey Epstein was pimping out his harem more seriously than I normally would, because one of the women’s attorneys is a former 9th Circuit judge appointed by a Republican who doesn’t seem like someone who would go crazy on something like this without evidence. (Paul Cassell, for the legal eagles – he’s partisan, but he’s not stupid, and he has a reputation I don’t think he’d throw in the toilet.)

And don’t get me started on how Epstein — who has 40-odd women who he’s paid off for having underage sex with them somehow just gets a sweetheart plea deal of only serving 13 months on a single sealed state court charge. Must be nice to be a Friend of Tony and Andrew and Bill (Clinton, not Cosby).

ADD: The 2003 Vanity Fair profile seems oddly prophetic, including the discussion of Epstein’s taste for young women, and how Alan Dershowitz is a big buddy of his.

* Prince William and Catherine use Windsor as their last name, apparently Andrew uses “York” when checking into hotels, per the Washington Post.

@SanFranLefty: Being a right-proper Royal, I’m sure princy did the naughty thing with his nasty bits and the whole encounter was over in less than eight seconds.

Alan Dershowitz conversely–ugh!–would’ve launched into at least 45 minutes of pontificating prior, which would have made the entire ordeal even more insufferable… that poor girl. Jesus.

I really don’t understand the whole obsession with fucking teenagers. That’s like hiring a chauffeur who doesn’t know how to drive.

/Recently on the Twits/
“There’s a woman at Whole Foods selecting asparagus more carefully than I chose my husband.”

@SanFranLefty: Is that Randy Andy? If so, would he need help finding women? And the notion of Alan Dershowitz having sex with anything is revolting.

@SanFranLefty: Wills and Kate use Cambridge (for his Duke of Cambridge title). Harry uses Wales, as Wills did before his marriage.

@Dodgerblue: It is. And he’s old and fat now, so yes.

@Mistress Cynica: Who the fuck uses Windsor then? Obviously I have fallen down on the job since my US Weekly subscription expired four years ago.

@SanFranLefty: They’re the “House of Windsor,” but the various offspring tend to use their titles (York, Wessex, Wales, etc.) as last names, as other British dukes and earls do. E.g., Poor Edith is Edith Crawley, but her mother is Cora Grantham.

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment