Tuesday’s Odds

Armed Insurrection: 20-1

The President of the United States Erupts in a Flaming Pyre of Despair in the Rose Garden: 10-1

You Picked the Wrong Week to Stop Sniffing Glue: 3-1

Banal Civic Platitudes That Ignore The Shit We’re Still In: 1-10

Smoke Billows From Steve Kornacki’s Ears: 10-1

Joy: 100-1

Relief: Even

“Oh fuck, what now?”: 1-50

Simulation Unplugged, Revealing That We’ve Been Making Strides Toward Social Justice and a Green Economy Under a Clinton Presidency, Albeit While Still Bombing Brown People: 500-1

Democracy: Even

41 Comments

The Trump Train just went by – for like an hour. My guess is they’re on their way to Olympia. First they’re going to clog up traffic on the 1/4 mile of elbow-to-elbow strip malls and fast food joints on their way to I-5.

ETA: And the Tesla station! O_o It’s for those outsiders driving from Seattle to Portland. The station isn’t far from the train tracks and seems like a good place to mug someone.

I stopped counting how many trucks were going by when I became hypnotized by the number of flags people were able to put in the beds of their trucks.

No longer horrified, I started laughing. I wish I had the money for all that bullshit.

Emailing pictures in a few.

Now I’m wondering if I need a shotgun.

These fools are going to burn the place down.

Jizz Stains Steve Kornacki’s Pants: 10-1

Fixed!

Shouldn’t “Banal Civic Platitudes That Ignore The Shit We’re Still In” have odds closer to 500-1?

Extraterrestrial alien invasion: More likely every day.
Don’t blame me, I voted for Kodos.

WHERE ARE THE FUCKING POLL WATCHERS!?

GET THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR CHEAP FUCKING TRUCKS AND GET THEE TO THE POLLS TO SING THE HORST WESSEL, SEIG! HEIL! AND SHOOT OVER THE HEADS OF THE FILTHY LIBBIES AND PROVIDE SOME ENTERTAINMENT – AND TARGETS FOR LITTLE OLD LADIES WITH MOLOTOV COCKTAILS!

Welp, time for the dog-shit political reporters to fan out to the nation’s Hateland and interview smug old white fucksticks on why they voted for Prezinazi AntiChrist.

Oh, the diners are all boarded up and bankrupt and everyone’s dead from the COVID. Wow, too bad.

My only regret is that I won’t get to beat the shit outta Tr666p with my bare hands… but I’m not bitter, tee hee hee.

Let’s just say I’m gonna have a lot of graves to piss on if I ever make it back to the East Coast.
I’ll need an old priest, a young priest, and about a zillion gallons of holy Mountain Dew.

Dixville Notch has voted. Whatever’s gonna happen, it has begun.

Imagine being so inept and awful that you can’t even hold Tejas for the GOPers.

@nojo: Where were the POLL! WATCHERS! at Dixville Notch? How could they have failed THE! PLENIPOTENTIARY! ?

I’m going for a five or six hour walk through the *antifa* *anarchist* jurisdiction of San Francisco. Gotta start burning off the Quarantine 15 (or 30) due to the stress eating and stress drinking.

@SanFranLefty: I have many geek chores to happily preoccupy me until 6pm MT, at which point I plan on melting into a puddle.

@SanFranLefty: As usual, I’ve never been able to understand why the corporate media shills never ask the obvious question of “why is being against fascism bad?”
in tandem with “why’s it so hard to say nazis are bad?”

And so many people are fleeing “anarchist antifa jurisdictions” like Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco, and Seattle that a gawdam middle class house costs a million dollars! They’re practically giving them away OMG!

@SanFranLefty: I hear that sistah. I definitely gained the 15 from eating my feelings like crazy from March through July. It’s taken three months of non-stop dog walking and home workouts to make a dent in getting my body back to normal, jeezus.

#ApocalypseLife

Florida can eat shit and die.

They aughtta have that on their license plates.

So does it all hinge on how Detroit swings?

So all of the polls have been completely wrong for years.
It’s safe to say the polling profession now has been totally discredited and will be tossed on the same pseudo-science trash heap as alchemy and astrology.

Senate’s unclear, at least to me. Can’t bitch about the filibuster if we don’t hit 50.

Regardless of the outcome, this KKKountry is as fucked as Yugoslavia in the 90s.
Democrats won the debates, raised the most money, and turned out the most votes, and it still doesn’t matter.

Republinazis don’t even have a platform or any plan for the next four years, yet they’ll be able to puke up enough obstruction and destruction in the Senate to block any effort to save us. Sociopathic racist hatred is the only force in this nation that’s real.

After four years of total chaos, countless lies, amoral cruelty, grotesque insanity, abject stupidity, and open kleptocracy, capped off by economic collapse, massive homicidal police brutality and a pandemic that’s killed over 230,000 of us and rising, enough voters surveyed the desperate wreckage and shrieked “FOUR MORE YEARS–PREZINAZI ANTICHRIST KILL US ALL!!!”

America is a death cult that’s turned to self-annihilation in our national murder-suicide, and COVID-19 will grant their wish and turn the red states into the dead states.

“Canada welcomes refugees, but you can’t claim refugee status. That’s reserved for people fleeing countries where the rule of law has collapsed, there are gun-toting vigilantes in the streets, the electoral process is corrupt and strongmen use state power to pardon their felonious friends and punish their enemies. Oh, I see …”

https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2020-11-04/2020-election-move-canada-threat

@FlyingChainSaw: Seems they’re going full Brooks Brothers Riot in Detroit right now.

@nojo:

“Count the ballots don’t count the ballots!!!”

“We’ve always been at war with EASTasia!!!
Or is it EURasia!!! Or BOTH!!!

“Keep firing, assholes!”

Seems NV will be dropping more votes today after all — perhaps enough to make a call. If Fox calls it, that’s 270 for them.

CNN’s still being cautious about AZ, and personally I prefer caution. But I wouldn’t mind Fox throwing a wrench in the works early, since that suffocates remaining ratfuckery.

@nojo: besides, Vanity Fair reports that Drumpf was so furious when Fox called Arizona for Biden that he called Rupert Murdoch and screamed at him to retract the call. Murdoch said no.

@SanFranLefty: Don’t know whether it was Rupert or Ailes or both, but beneath all that propaganda they somehow built a solid polling/counting outfit. Maybe they just didn’t want to bullshit themselves.

@nojo: NV reverses course again, no new tallies today. At least until the next announcement.

Several historians have compared this debacle to the election of 1860.

Sure’s a good thing that America had an uneventful, boring decade after that one.

Wherever this cruel, insane KKKountry goes from here, it’s not gonna be good.

/seen online/

“Thanks to the GOP, Murdoch and Fox, 48% of the country is pro treason.
Pro sexual assault.
Pro racism.
Pro fear.
Pro Russia.
None of which is American. China isn’t wrong, we are collapsing.
Back when the Democrats controlled everything we defeated Japan and Germany, built the largest industrial capacity in the world, built the Middle Class, and to cap it off we put a man on the moon.
Fifty years of GOP tax cuts and we can’t even paint our bridges and have $22 trillion in debt.”

Worst US presidents:

1) James Buchanan, 1857–1861, whose self-serving callousness, cruelty, racism, and stupidity led directly to the Civil War;
2) George Dumbya CaliguBush, 2001–2009, whose corruption, lies, and incompetence caused decades of failed foreign wars, trillions of dollars of unrepayable debt, at least a million deaths, and a total economic collapse;
3) Andrew Johnson, 1865–1869, whose gross negligence and treasonous embrace of former Confederates short-circuted reconstruction and allowed Jim Crow laws to perpetuate for almost a century causing barbaric suffering for millions;
4) Dotard Judas Tr666p, 2017–2021, a racist psychopath, former gameshow host, Russian money launderer, serial sexual predator, and a rapist, whose daily lies, incompetence, insanity, and stupity destroyed America’s global leadership by revealing that there’s no difference between government, corporations, and organized crime.
He actively spread the coronavirus and caused the deaths of hundreds of thousands of Americans and is worshipped by Evilungelical ChrISIStians as their white trash AntiChrist messiah.
5) I dunno, Nixon?

Sweet FSM, will Pennsyltucky just declare Diamond Joe the winner already.

Anyone wanna bet on when Dotard Jr. ODs?
He’s looked completely wasted for the last few months.
Srsly, is he a major cokehead or whut. All that missing donor munnie must’ve gone right up his nose.

I’m really curious what combination of magic words Democrats could say that would make rural voters hate us less and stop voting against their own interests and for our mutual destruction.

I mean, Joe Biden is the most moderate milquetoast white man that ever milquetoasted, and they think he’s a raving islamocommunist.

Puddup or shuddup, dumfux.

@¡Andrew!: They don’t agree what their own interests are. Whatever they think their interests are, they think someone like Trump satisfies them. And when he doesn’t, they pretend he does anyway.

We live in a society where it’s possible to survive while being that divorced from reality. Something of an accomplishment, really.

@¡Andrew!:

Right – Biden is an insane Saracen who lives and breathes the rage of the white genocidist and islamofascist monster bent on murdering the last white man in America and using his wife to breed jihadi.

Everyone knows that

@nojo: They can do that after New Year’s? WOW!

Okay, now waiting to pay out #2.

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