Paul Ryan Gets a Charge Out of Fisting Queen FUCKFACE! von CLOWNSTICK! and Making Him Make a Funny Face!

MOMMMMEEEEEE! That's it, FUCKFACE! Call me fucking MOMMMEEEE! when I twist my fist in your big fat fucking ass! This will get you ready for that 10000 year sentence you get in Allenwood and the 1000s of cannibal neonazi serial killers who are going to you their bride!

MOMMMMEEEEEE! That’s it, FUCKFACE! Call me fucking MOMMMEEEEEEE! when I twist my fist in your big fat fucking ass! This will get you ready for that 10,000 year sentence you will get in Leavenworth and all nice and ripped open for the 1000s of cannibal neonazi serial killers who are going to make you their bizarre, orange bride!

History’s most insanely malicious president and the biggest ASSHOLE! to sit in the speakers chair, displacing boy rapists like Dennis Hastert and obscene, raving drunks like John Boehner are like Jeffrey Dahmer and Charles Manson in the same softball team, ever competitive and always trying to cave in the other asshole’s face with a Louisville Slugger.

But we know that Washington, DC is Paul Ryan’s domain and he leads a small army of sick and twisted Republicans who have every hope to turn American into a wasteland, a hideous pile of burning rubble they can blame on TRUMPLIGULA!

Ryan’s fist will twist first and last.

 

 

59 comments:

10:38 am • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Not exactly the nooz we’ve been hoping for, but Devil Numbnutz has “recused” himself from the Tdumbp/Ru$$ia investigation/farce.

BTW, I just learned that he’s only one year older than me. Man, he looks like shit.

12:06 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@¡Andrew!: That’s one of my favorite games, followed by “you’re my age and you have no excuse for being a reptilian asshole”.

1:00 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Hearty thanks to Mitch McConnell for blowing up a weapon that’s been predominantly used to block progressive legislation.

1:04 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Blar blar blar, Justice White lead in rushing, blar, so confirm Gorsuch, blah, Colorado, blar.

1:07 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Blar blar, I don’t know what Chevron is, but Imma yak about it on the floor because rushing and Colorado.

1:08 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Bring up International Shoe, and I might be impressed.

1:13 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@¡Andrew!: @nojo: As far as I can tell, she’s not an asshole, but WTF Jennifer Beals?

1:15 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: One day, would you mind giving me a political history lesson re: filllllabusterin’? Internet falls short.

1:26 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@JNOV: I thought I wrote an enovel about it near the end of the Obamacare fight, but every time I look, I can’t find it.

Short version: The filibuster was a Senate debate-rule oversight that wasn’t noticed for a generation or two, which the South pounced on as soon as they realized the benefits it would bestow. And even then it was somewhat rarely used until the late 1970s, when the Marathon Chatter requirement was removed.

There was also some math that Senators representing only 30 percent of the population can hold up legislation the other 70 percent supports.

I may revisit the matter Friday night, but I’ve learned not to plan ahead — shit keeps going down Friday afternoons.

1:49 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

I like the senator with the lysp.

1:50 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: Thank you, nojito. I remember you writing something about Harry Reid (?) when Dems had the Senate, but I am teh slow.

2:42 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@JNOV: All I can find are short bursts about Harry being a wimp for not pulling the trigger. But I definitely remember doing the research, and discovering the parliamentary accidents that led to the filibuster.

2:50 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: (I’d like to point out that I do know who Harry Reid is; I just wasn’t sure that he was the guy you were writing about.)

3:11 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@¡Andrew!: Hey – heard something on the radio about a public ceremony/celebration now that Kennewick Man has been laid to rest.

Ah, here it is. http://kuow.org/post/northwest-tribes-conduct-public-ceremony-marking-kennewick-man-s-return

May 12th – maybe it won’t be raining. Wanna go? History all around us.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way – in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

3:22 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: Sadly, the RepubliKKKan GenXers like Cotton, Cruz, Ryan, Rubio et al, are some of the most flatout evil SOBs on the planet. I’d hoped for better from my generation.

@JNOV: Jennifer Beals took the potion.

3:23 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@JNOV: I’ve been keeping my weekends open for protesting–and I’ve been roped into ringleading my Neighborhood Action Coalition meetings–so I’ll have 2 get back 2 U.

3:31 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@¡Andrew!: I saw it happen late in college, when some smart kids turned neocon because that’s where the “ideas” were.

But then, I had already blamed my generation for disco.

9:40 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

If they try to draft my kid…

9:45 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@JNOV: This is why Saint Jimmy pissed the hell out of me when he sent the choppers to Iran. I was 20.

9:56 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: I think I was conceived to keep my father out of Vietnam.

9:57 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

50 fucking tomahawks?

10:00 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

So, I’ll leave the kid alone for now. His GF might be hair on fire, and hell, I’m pretty sure he’s working toward hair on fire and pure sadness.

10:05 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@JNOV: Can’t wait for the backstory on that, should ww survive.

10:19 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Unilateral bullshit

10:20 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

Theater for China.

10:32 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

The Intercept called it this afternoon:

https://theintercept.com/2017/04/06/u-s-weighs-saturation-strike-on-syrian-government-in-response-to-chemical-attack/

Massive strike, dozens of missiles.

10:46 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: So, like I was saying, always wait until Friday night to think about what to write…

10:56 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

A tomahawk of truth smacked right into a skull filled with lies is what’s really necessary.

10:57 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@nojo: I can’t think of any drugs that would help me with this.

11:00 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

I’m sorry, but I do not buy that this bastard who gave zero shits about Syrian refugees had a sudden change of heart.

Hey, Xi Jinping! Look what I can do! Pass the salt.

11:06 pm • Thursday • April 6, 2017

@JNOV: Trump’s been aching for an opportunity to look tough. As with all his other actions, distill it into a primal impulse. End of story.

Example: AHCA. He didn’t give a shit what was in it, or whether it contradicted one of his signature campaign promises. He just wanted to sign a major bill and Look Presidential, the way he wields those empty executive orders.

12:43 am • Friday • April 7, 2017

We told the Russians, the Russians told the Syrians, and it’s a grand show for everyone.

1:08 am • Friday • April 7, 2017

@nojo: Yes. Rally around the flag nonetheless.

1:10 am • Friday • April 7, 2017

I mean, what kind of military action is a “one off”? I can’t describe my shock, dismay, and disbelief. Things keep getting worse, and it’s all a show with real consequences.

1:12 am • Friday • April 7, 2017

@JNOV: My dad had already been drafted but was serving stateside. Heard a rumor that his unit would be sent on an adventure in Southeast Asia and luckily my mother was a fertile Myrtle and conceived me within a month, so he got to stay in the US of A. And yes from time to time as an adolescent I’d remind him of that fact.

1:14 am • Friday • April 7, 2017

@nojo: And Brian Williams quotes Leonard Cohen while watching missiles go boom. FFS.

P.S. I nominate “Hey, Xi Jinping! Look what I can do! Pass the salt.” as the Stinque tweet of the day. Hell, I’m going to steal it, JNOV.

1:36 am • Friday • April 7, 2017

I’m not invoking Yemen yet, but I’d like to know what the $70 million (choose yer estimate) in Tomahawks accomplished.

Well, besides all the obvious cynical stuff.

Presuming the airbase they targeted was indeed responsible for launching the Sarin mission, did they destroy it? Did destroying the airbase significantly reduce Assad’s capabilities? If the missiles were symbolic, will they make Assad think twice about launching another gas attack, or is he effectively untouchable because of the Russians?

For starters.

Cable news (Hi, Brian!) loves the golly-gosh of missiles flying, so it’ll take a few days for details to emerge from the propaganda. And then I’ll invoke Yemen.

1:51 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

Re: Vietnam, my dad graduated college in 1967 and immediately volunteered, figuring that he would be drafted anyway and that way could at least choose a less dangerous branch versus being conscripted into whichever service most needed new blood. Of course, he went in as an officer, so the danger was already diminished, but the Navy was still preferable to other options. Then, after two years of a three-year commitment, things were already winding down enough that he received an early discharge, at which point he used the G.I. Bill to at least defray (not sure how generous the education benefits were at that point) the costs of an MA and a JD. He comes across as remarkably ambivalent about it all, but he is a very reserved person, so who knows.

2:28 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@mellbell: I fell in the crack between the Draft and Registration, but I was certainly paying attention to that stuff as a kid — if not Canada, then how do work the system to increase your odds of survival?

Don’t recall how high my birthday turned up in the Draft Lottery, but I certainly checked that every year, too.

3:31 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@nojo: Reuters: Syrians launch airstrike from bombed base.

$70 million ain’t what it used to be.

8:00 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

My dad was in the Air Force during the early Vietnam years and randomly got stationed in France (I think), or maybe Germany. Anyways, life sure can be a roll of the dice.

8:04 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

/worth reading/

Psychologist Philip Zimbardo of the Stanford Prison Experiment: Donald Trump is an “unconstrained, unbridled present hedonist”

In the almost five decades since Zimbardo conducted what is now known as the Stanford Prison Experiment, there has been an increase in the coarseness and meanness of America’s popular culture. What has been described as a “culture of cruelty” is the new normal and surveillance is omnipresent. Political polarization and dysfunction have broken the standing norms and rules of good governance in Washington, trust in political and social institutions such as the news media has declined, authoritarianism has increased among conservatives, the social safety net has been torn apart and the nation’s police continue to abuse and kill black and brown Americans with near impunity.

This is “social dominance behavior” filtered through racism and the neoliberal economic order. The sum total of these (and other) factors has resulted in the election of the neofascist Donald Trump as president of the United States. In many ways, Trump’s election was a decision by millions of American voters to punish their fellow citizens. These people were encouraged and enabled in this desire to do harm by their leaders in the right-wing media and by Trump himself.

9:38 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

I’ve been telling my kid how awesome Iceland is. I haven’t been telling him that my knowledge is based on Sens8 and some of Benedick’s photos of fjords.

9:44 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@JNOV: Stay off the Van Damme bus.

9:53 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@nojo: How awesome is that arc? I could do without that guy from Lost. I’m still feeling burned. I keep trying to like Daryl Hannah, but I never have, even before the fish movie.

Hey – I’ve never seen Blade Runner but have read Androids…Sheep. Is the movie good? Maybe Hannah was good in that film.

9:58 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@JNOV: I’ve almost forgiven the Wachowskis for everything that followed the original Matrix. I could pick at Sense8, but the sheer audaciousness is compelling.

Blade Runner: One of my Top Few. The Vangelis score hasn’t aged well, and some folks are partial to the VO-less Director’s Cut, but start with the theatrical version. That’s what hooked us to begin with.

10:36 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@nojo: They did stuff after the Matrix?

Yeah, there are plenty of tropes in Sens8, but it’s the different stuff, maybe even new, that has me hooked and makes me kind of warm fuzzy.

The second season of Humans was disappointing.

The Walking Dead – ugh. Is that even still on?

I love the Americans, although I’m not sure what took so long for them to realize that life back home might not be okay.

11:01 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@JNOV: Well, they killed Glenn, but he lasted a lot longer than his inspiration.

I still trawl through it when a season shows up on Netflix, but I haven’t paid close attention for awhile. It’s the same plot every year.

11:43 pm • Friday • April 7, 2017

@nojo: Have you watched Taboo?

12:20 am • Saturday • April 8, 2017

@JNOV: Never heard of it. There are a couple shows I’d like to watch — Mister Robot and Atlanta — but if they don’t show up on Hulu or Netflix, I don’t see them.

12:35 am • Saturday • April 8, 2017

@nojo: Mr. Robot is very good – mindbendingly good. It has my kid’s seal of approval.

I haven’t heard of Atlanta, and I happened on Taboo by accident. Tom Hardy and crew are wonderfully dark. Sometimes it takes itself too seriously. I can’t say much without spoilers, but the history component is interesting.

12:41 am • Saturday • April 8, 2017

@JNOV: Atlanta is Donald Glover’s comedy about the hiphop scene there, and I hear it’s very good. Which may be all I ever know about it.

12:41 am • Saturday • April 8, 2017

Full circle – Ridley Scott has a hand in Taboo.

Peaky Blinders recently started filming season 3.

I think Penny Dreadful and Peaky Blinders are on Netflix. The second season of Black Mirror was meh except for the selfie story.

12:44 am • Saturday • April 8, 2017

@nojo: Hip hop has been getting a lot of attention recently. Maybe I’ll change my FB pics to my hip hop 21st birthday house party. The cops only came once, and only one person needed stitches.

1:13 am • Saturday • April 8, 2017

@JNOV: I do like me some Peaky Blinders.

8:04 pm • Saturday • April 8, 2017

Love Sense8.

We’ve been needing more laughs in general, so we’re enjoying Grace & Frankie and the Golden Girls.

I’ve been bracing myself for The Handmaid’s Tale, which starts later this month.

1:30 am • Sunday • April 9, 2017

I just discovered “Man vs. A Whole Lot of Dangerous Stuff.” I love this too much. Fucking idiots.

I didn’t come here to compete with bears and cougars over territory.

SMDH

I do miss nekkid Bear Grylls making sinking rafts.

9:27 pm • Monday • April 10, 2017

@¡Andrew!: If you haven’t seen Feud: Bette and Joan, get on that at once. I bought the season on Amazon. Terrific fun without crossing the line into pure camp. I’m also loving the Shetland series on Netflix–police procedural set in the Shetland Islands, which seem attractively remote at the moment. Like Iceland, but they sort of speak English.

5:22 pm • Wednesday • April 12, 2017

@Mistress Cynica: The Shetlands look like they have the kind of summers that make Seattle look like South Beach.

Add a comment