Everything is Gruesome

The last time I was in a situation like this, I typed in the cheat code for BFG aka Big Fucking Gun.

/old skule Doom/

Forgot you have to put up with ComicCon every year. We had to put up with the GOP in 2004, and Bob the Builder shows up at the Beacon every 6 months or so. That means Park Slope mommies and daddies and fucking discarded fruit rollup leftovers. Ringo was here a couple weeks ago, but his fans are harmless.

“You’re alone in a mysterious new world, full of hidden dangers. You have only minutes to find food and shelter before darkness falls and the monsters come looking for you. What do you do?”

Call your agent. And avoid 44th street.

@Benedick: Finding food? Don’t look in Gristede’s.

@blogenfreude: Considering Comic-Con got here 32 years before I did, it’s only fair.

@nojo: but back then it was 15 guys with a few long boxes, no costumes, and no girlfriends.

@blogenfreude: I was thinking more of that autograph hound who runs up at you to ask ‘Are you anybody?’ Not a good question to ask at the best of times.

@Benedick: Just tell them you’re Sean Connery–no one under 30 would question it.

@Benedick: But you look like somebody… no, wait, I’ll get it… say “ex-parrot”.

@¡Andrew!: Conceptual jinx!

Crime of the Century Dept, from the LA Times:

A woman who became topless as she attempted to flee a Macy’s in Arcadia during an alleged shoplifting attempt in June has turned herself in, police said.

Jeannie Hua, 45, of Alhambra allegedly concealed merchandise inside her purse and, when she tried to leave the store, a loss prevention officer attempted to detain her, according to Arcadia police.

During the ensuing struggle for Hua’s purse, her shirt and bra somehow came off. She then ran to her car, leaving behind her purse — with her driver’s license inside — and the items she allegedly tried to steal. A witness also recorded her license plate number as she fled the location, police said.

@Dodgerblue: The crime is naming somebody “loss prevention officer”, right?