Swedish Chef Traumatizes Yuppies of Europe

Gersh gurndy morn-dee burn-dee, burn-dee, flip-flip-flip-flip-flip-flip-flip-flip-flip.“Sweden’s IKEA stopped nearly all sales of meatballs at its furniture store cafeterias across Europe after tests in the Czech Republic on Monday showed some contained horsemeat.” [Reuters]


Wait till they figure out what Soylent Green is made of.

What are the two outstanding words in that sentence?

Czech Republic.

I rest my case.

silly brits are worried about a little horse meat when we have been subsisting on a steady diet of horse shit for decades.

today I had a long talk with my boss -who knows more about milking the government teat than anyone I know – about my new dream. starting a no kill shelter for old unwanted dogs. she seems to think we may be able to somehow link it to what we are already doing if I specifically say it is to give homes to the discarded pets of old people who can no longer take care of them. I really only need a little money to make a suitable place for them and then to help feed them. I will take care of them. I even have a name “Heavens Gate” in honor of this movie. yeah yeah I know but it rolls off the tounge so much better than “gates of heaven” and no one remembers that other dreadful movie anyway.
btw if you have not seen Gates of Heaven you really really should. it is about so much more than dead pets.

@Benedick: I’ve heard it’s actually lovely there, no snark. Not having ever left the Americas I couldn’t say for sure though.

Man, shut up and eat what you’ve got. Roll the dice, etc.

/back to fever-induced dreams of Bene and The Irish/

Trayvon Martin was killed one year ago. Doesn’t seem that long.

@CaptHowdy: Like the solidarity green. How’s Pinhead?

Wish there was a no kill shelter when my relative had my cats killed.

It wouldn’t be so bad if they said “CONTAINS PARTS OF Mr ED.”

The fact that it violates all those whole food labeling laws (which are tough in Europe), also violates trust people have in food corps and gives people pause in what they’re actually eating.

You would be surprised at how many people believe in the food corps.

@ManchuCandidate: I just ate donkey lips via hotdog.

Food label are for suckers.

I agree, fraud is bad.

@nojo: the song is: derrr bederbeder be derrr bederbeder be der burp burp burp. That’s how I sang it. Unless you’re saying something else in the alt text kind of like Bene’s little Irish football friend.


he is good. know what a Dremel Rotary Tool is?

I got one today with about a hundred little doo dads bit things of every size and shape. it should help.

@CaptHowdy: Heaven’s Gate is also the name of the cult which committed suicide en masse because they wanted to hitch a ride through the galaxies on a UFO trailing the Hale-Bopp comet and were under the spell of some New Age weirdo. Something to consider, perhaps.

@mellbell: I had Heaven’s Gate Nike’s before the mass suicide. I didn’t realize it until mass mocking. That was one scary dude. And the people who regretted not being there for the beam up? OMG

@CaptHowdy: I’ve seen them, but didn’t know what they were. What medium are you using to sculpt?

considered a plus.

the stuff is called Paper Clay. never heard of it but was directed to it by my friend (who won the competition last year). its great stuff. dries hard as a rock without firing. it is drillable sandable etc.

I love internet memes. google The Harlem Shake Compilation

@mellbell: ps
not doing it to make money. the whole idea is to give them a place to die with dignity. not unlike Marshall Applewhite in its own strange way. so I can call it whatever I like.

@CaptHowdy: Fair enough. Just thought it might come up with potential supporters/donors/whatever.


it wont take much. when I reach the retirement gravytrain I can probably finance it myself.

@CaptHowdy: You will let us know where we can contribute? You’ll find the Stinquers are a generous lot.

@Mistress Cynica:
thank you. I will. it may (or may not) take years.

@CaptHowdy: That movie was no good but it was not much worse or less better than all kinds of other shite. Yes the director was a prize fool but worse than Tarantino? It was a magnificent design. And ridiculous. But no more ridic than Deer Hunter or Funny Girl.

We were supposed to rescue a senior dog and ended up with Rosie. Let us know if we can help. If the dogs can help us die with dignity count me in.



one of my best friends for years Shirley Stoller was John Savages russian mother in Deer Hunter but I would have loved the movie anyway.
if you have never seen Seven Beauties you should.

also the Honeymoon Killers.

by the way I agree it was beautiful. seen Days of Heaven? Malicks much better effort in the heaven area.

@CaptHowdy: Days of Heaven is ravishing – apart from the acting which is mostly not very good. But a gorgeous film. I couldn’t watch Tree of Life because of all the whispering. Drives me crazy. Will Netflix Beauties.

I saw Seven Beauties in 75 when it came out. loved it. as in life changing. about a year later I had relocated to Manhattan and was at a party at a gay friends house chit chatting with a charming woman and literally in mid toke it hit me and I said something like “wait – oh my god and fuck me – YOU ARE THE COMMANDANT – I LOVE YOU!” we were instantly best friends from then until her death in 1999

@Benedick: as a lighting lead on Dinosaur I made everyone watch Days of Heaven about once a month. the most beautiful lighting evah.


shirley appears at about one minute

this clip does not haver her “entrance” which is one of the great scenes in movie history IMO. I remember reading a review that talked about watching her “speak italian with a german accent which was not bad for a girl from brooklyn” I miss Shirley almost every day. she was so completely unlike that character but played it so frighteningly well.

@CaptHowdy: It is gorgeous and ravishing. The music score is gorgeous, cinematography, editing, lighting ( as you say), production design, screenplay… it’s all wondrous. The only aspect that isn’t top-drawer is the acting. While it’s not bad it’s just not very good – apart from Linda… ? the child. She’s sensational. He never seems to get good enough performances. I don’t know why. Maybe it doesn’t interest him. Maybe it’s financing? Best perfs are in Bad Lands.

I think its because he doesnt like “acting” I think I have read that most of the dialog is improvised. his films have the feeling of documentaries.

@CaptHowdy: Nobody likes acting. But that’s no excuse. I’d suggest that after the screen test, the negotiations, the visit to agent’s office to sign contracts, the prep time, the costume fittings, finding a dogsitter, the flight to the location, the driver picking one up from one’s motel, the time spent in make up and wardrobe, breakfast at the honey wagon, the AD calling one to the set, the saying hello to the crew, the finding of one’s mark after the #2 team steps out, the clapper laying down the mark… etc, it doesn’t make much sense to me to then pretend that none of that happened and that really one is alone in one’s bathroom after the second cup of coffee. I don’t know many people who know how to improvise. Mostly it turns into an exercise in playwrighting. Of course the illusion must be that what the actors are doing doing is merely going about their lives but I think that’s best achieved with the maximum amount of artifice. Malik seems to have no problem with the extraordinary degree of artifice involved in the physical production of his films but doesn’t seem to demand the same level of expertise from his actors.

@CaptHowdy: I met Haskell Wexler when I was on the board for a film festival back in the Ancestral Homeland and got to tell him how much I loved the shooting in Days of Heaven. Modest guy, easy to talk to.

Add a Comment
Please log in to post a comment