The GOP Stakes Its Frottage.

Looking for a way to bring an increasingly fractious party together, Lindsey Graham and Mitch McConnell commission a new anthem for the GOP. Something stirring. Something butch. Something that brings to mind trustafarians standing over the ruins of the Trade Center towers. Or homeschooler lobbyists accusing our (devastatingly handsome and charming and sexy and did I say handsome, and no that is not Kevlar, that is muscle, and show me that grin?) president of liberaldick: aka an erection deflated by too much reality. As if. Our prez only becomes fully erect when reality rubs its crotch up against his fine basket. Which requires all kinds of denim yardage to contain it.

10 Comments

@ManchuCandidate: I’m thinking an updated Village People for the GOP candidates of the 2012 election, except instead of the construction worker, cowboy, et al, we have:

The Village Idiots

Frothy Mix dressed as priest carrying a big crucifix to exorcise vaginas
— Dr. Evol dressed as a Revolutionary War soldier lugging around a bag of gold coins
— Newticle dressed as an astronaut with a breathing tube conveying the smoke coming out of his ass as his sole source of oxygen
— Mittens dressed as well…a capitalist pig 1%er in a Brooks Brother suit, an Irish Setter with diarrhea on leash

And Manchu, I challenge you to rework YMCA to YGOP. Go!

Lindsey and Mitch should consider Comfortably Numb.

@SanFranLefty: I once rewrote YMCA as AARP for a friends 50th b’day.

“Young man” became “Old fart”.

@Dave H: All sentient observers of this trainwreck/clusterfuck should consider and adopt it as a mantra.

@SanFranLefty: I overlooked the most obvious choice. They don’t need a new anthem for the GOP. There’s one already available that should set very well with a base that already LOVES the battle flag. Might as well use the song too. Time to bring back “Dixie”.

@SanFranLefty:
Ha, the Village Idiots seems quite fitting.

I’ll work on it tomorrow.

@Dave H: Hands off my Comfortably Numb. But in the spirit of compromise, I’ll allow Money.

Young man, there’s no need to feel down.
I said, young man, just pull your boot straps up.
I said, young man, ’cause you’re in low tax town
There’s no need to be unhappy.

Young man, there’s a place you can go.
I said, young man, when you’ve got loads of dough.
You can stay there, and I’m sure you will find
Many ways “wink wink” to have a good time.

It’s fun to stay at the P-G-O-P.
It’s fun to stay at the P-G-O-P.

They have everything that you need to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the boys …

IIt’s fun to stay at the P-G-O-P.
It’s fun to stay at the P-G-O-P.*

You can project onto others , you can stay in the closet
You can do whatever you feel …

*Projecting-G-O-P.

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