Soul-Crushing Headline of the Day

[Psych Central]

Happiness is sooooooooo 20th century.

I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the roar of my crushing despair.

Ex GF asked me yesterday how I deal with the crushing despair of the Holiday Season – my answer? I’m that miserable ALL FUCKING YEAR.

I’m in Sacramento. I’d be happier if I were at home.

@Dodgerblue: There are many better places to be than Sacramento.

I’ll be working through my soul crushing despair with a mojito or two starting in about 17 minutes (but who’s counting?)

@Dodgerblue and Walking Still: There are many worse places to be than Sacramento. Like 200-odd miles to the south.

@Dodgerblue: If I were in Sac, I’d be happier in North Korea. In a prison.

A half bottle of a decent pinot noir makes being as good as homeless not as bad as it should be.

@Tommmcatt Be Fat, And That Be That: I think this is a reference to the State prison that Bodhisattva Lefty visited today.

@Tommmcatt Be Fat, And That Be That: You know, when you are on 99 going south out of SAC and hit Merced and wonder who the kids are that go to the UC there and are thankful you’re not one of them?
And then it gets stinkier and foggier, and then you hit Fresno?
And then you go another hour and you can’t stop gagging from the toxic air mixture of chemicals and cow shit?
And if you didn’t see so many California license plates you’d think you were in Oklahoma or west Texas?
And you are horrified to suddenly realize that you still have another hour before you hit Bakersfield, let alone the two hours before you get to Santa Clarita or the grapevine?

yeah, about that spot. it’s worse than Excremento. Trust me.

@SanFranLefty: You can thank the ag-dominated San Joaquin Valley Air District for some of that.

@SanFranLefty: True enough. I’ve spent more time than I care to remember in various parts of that neighborhood (including Merced). They are all worse than the Tomato.

@SanFranLefty: My cousin was in that hoosegow (near Bakersfield?), and after he did his time, he went to a TX hoosegow. I love my family.

Another prison I used pass was Chino. “Do not pick up hitchhikers!” Okay!

@karen marie has her eyes tight shut: Parfois, je suis ici. Merci de me manquent.

@SanFranLefty: Yes. Dustbowl Escapee Destination Number One: high desert dust bowl + Valley Fever.

Tehachipi and Moro Bay are nice, though. And Sequoia Nat’l Forest. Montana de Oro (camp on the cliffs and be lulled to sleep by the ocean). We got the fuck out of Bakersfield as much as possible — only place my kid experienced serious racism — when he was four years old and at a pricey pre-school.

I like driving though some of those ghost towns as you head west, oil derricks in the background.

So yeah, it’s the Hell-idays, BUT WAIT!

I watched this video and LMAO so hard for real. It’s a bit long and totally NSFW, so insert those earbuds and try to stifle the laughter.

People I Would Fock

@¡Andrew!: OMG! I’m crying! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OMG! And the SHOWS! OMG!

Spoiler Alert:

Pete and Pete? Fuck yeah!

Argh. Hard returns and [less than]p or br[greater than] don’t work.


Ducky from The Land Before Time, and Tom Brady, obviously.

@¡Andrew!: Do you watch Weeds? If so, did you see the scene with Nancy and Zack? Ho ho ho!

Justin, Justin, Justin.

Zombies. Dude. Too awesome.

@JNOV: I watched it right up until SPOILER ALERT that gay DEA agent got his face sawn off. It stopped being a La-La Land fantasy at that point and shit jus’ got too real.

@¡Andrew!: Okay. Good point. The show is evolving, believe it or not. Anyway — watch the Zach episode. It’s the beginning of Nancy getting hers and not always manipulating herself out of the fix she got everyone in. So, yeah. Still kinda real, but the funny came back, too. Roosters coming home to roost, such as. Problem is that you won’t understand why they are where they are, but you will get to see Zack’s lovely ass…

@¡Andrew!: I think he’s on the juice, but I really don’t care, because he looks incredibly hot. Lemme see what I can dig up.

@JNOV has a right to be hostile (it’s a book, okay?): Yeah, did you get my messages? Wasn’t able to leave one last time. You are gone from book of faces? Email me @ lucylovesmittens at the google mail thingy.

@¡Andrew!: TOTALLY NSFW. I have no idea why I enter my real birth date when prompted. And I hate Perez, but this is the scene. Mary-Louise Parker’s ass is looking good, too. (I can’t believe we’re the same age >:/ )

ETA: Nope — she has almost two years on me.

@JNOV: Well if it makes you feel better, Zack Morris and I are the same age, and my azz simply will not look like that no matter how many squats I do at the gym.

@¡Andrew!: Right#8253; (Interrobang don’t fail me now…get down!) I didn’t even recognize Zack at first.

ETA: Phooey!

@¡Andrew!: It’s steroids, man, and you are quite the hotness. LOVE runners!

Sorry I didn’t mention that it’s that str8 business, but beauty is beauty.



‽ , courtesy of Stinque Search Function.

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