Newt Gingrich Has Never Worked a Day in His Life

Newt Gingrich, launching his campaign to put Dickens back in Christmas, used a curious phrase to express his demand that poor kids clean toilets: They need to learn the “dignity of work”.

Which led us to wonder: Has Newt ever worked?

And by “work”, we mean — well, the metaphorical equivalent of cleaning toilets. You know: A job. Like most people have. And most people hate.

By the standard most folks understand, Newt certainly hasn’t worked since November 1998, when he quit Congress after blowing the midterm election. He’s certainly been scheming, but he hasn’t been working.

For that matter, holding a Congressional seat certainly isn’t a job. If you care to dispute that, ask how many votes congresscritters can skip before getting fired. And ask how many Republicans would claim it as honest work. Never mind dignified.

And since Newt held that seat since 1979, that’s at least three decades that he hasn’t worked.

Let’s knock off the fourth: From 1970-1978, Newt taught at West Georgia College, which he quit after being denied tenure. We’ve been associated with a public university all our life, so we’re intimately familiar with the claim that faculty members work hard. And if our support-staff mother had the same generous vacation terms as the Call-Me-Doctors, we might even be inclined to agree.

But try convincing teabaggers that being a college prof is honest work, and you’ll understand why we’re not counting it.

We’re not counting the Sixties, either: Newt graduated high school in 1961, college in 1965, earned a master’s in 1968, and a doctorate in 1971. (Gee, what else was happening while Newt was prime draft age?)

Which now sets us back a half-century. But surely Newt spent his high school years cleaning toilets to build his character? Nope. France. Army brat.

Our research certainly isn’t exhaustive, but if there’s any evidence that Newt himself enjoyed the character-building toilet cleaning he advises for poor kids, we can’t find it. Which only makes sense. Because when it comes to Newt Gingrich, “dignity” isn’t the word that comes to mind.


Damn Welfare Millionaire sucking at the teat of the hard working* people of US America.

*only used to describe white Conservatives… anyone else, sorry.

He got denied tenure at West Georgia College? How much of a loser do you have to be?

@Mistress Cynica:
I think his “career” and “writings” speaks for themselves.

@Mistress Cynica: Well, Georgia does have a strong state system in the larger scheme and really potent in some disciplines. What’s striking is the time line: ge applied for tenure 7 years after his dissertation was accepted. It tells me about his sense of entitlement more than the school. At that time, he’s still in post-doc land for a lot of disciplines and he throws himself in front of the tenure committee? Why? Because he is so fucking special? Unless he had a monster publishing streak, he was likely advised (if anyone talked to him then) to wait a bit and build that publications record. Tenure decisions are based on record of service to the institution, research publishing record, teaching record and, in some disciplines, level of funding for independent research. Gingrich apparently believes just showing up entitles him to all available forms of exaltation.

@FlyingChainSaw: neutered certainly feels entitled. he is beginning to remind me of another candidate who felt entitled, had a long record of failure, and said stupid shit.

@FlyingChainSaw: I’m actually a little unclear on the tenure timeline. Newt ran for Congress in 1974 and 1976, finally winning in 1978. I don’t know when he applied for tenure, and when he was denied — just that he was denied, and quit in 1978.

But if he’s hired (as an ABD) in 1970 and running for Congress in 1974, well, clearly he doesn’t plan on hanging around.

@nojo: I gave him all that time, just to give Neut the benefit of the doubt and he’s still mememememememepayattentiontomemememememebecauseimmememememememe, I deserve a tenure gig in no time flat because I am Me.

Worth finding out if the tenure decision is public information because it’s a state school. Might have been denied because he was having sex with the janitor’s dog or cannibalism or something god forgave him for so he could be president with a clear conscience.

@FlyingChainSaw: I can’t speak to the situation in the 70s, but these days it’s 7 years (at most) and out if you don’t get tenure, especially in the humanities. I got tenure at a large state university after six years, in my first higher ed position. I know there were a plethora of Ph. D.s in the 70s, since all the teachers at my secondary school had them–and from places like Temple and U of Chicago. But yes, Newtie’s arrogance no doubt did him in–plus I’m sure all his superiors fucking hated him, and that does count when tenure is on the line.

@FlyingChainSaw: neutered fucked one of his high school teachers, but i’ll bet nobody else would or did. so no telling what he fucked or fucked up to piss off west georgia.

@Mistress Cynica: But did you join the state university’s lecturing staff the same year you got your PhD? Six years. Woah. That’s quick compared to sciences.

@FlyingChainSaw: Year before, looking at the dates — hired as an ABD in 1970, probably on condition that he complete his dissertation quickly. Which he did in 1971.

Not unusual, by my understanding — friend of mine had similar timing.

@DElurker: Heartwarming. The Gingrich story is really the story of the top 1% since the Reagan years. Use every last shred of influence and authority to squeeze more and more dollars out of the chumps – and keep it all.

@DElurker: I don’t know what was a funnier line in that article:

“…his family-owned talent agency…”


“He reported no liabilities…”

Oh, I can think of a few.

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