Lonesome Dud

Our guest columnist is Texas Ron Paul supporter Robert Morrow, who placed the above ad in the Austin Chronicle, and whose accusations we can neither verify nor resist.

The same man who used a presidential prayer rally (8/6/11) for his personal ambitions and who often spouts Christian buzzwords and Bible talk to advance his political career is a flagrant adulterer, having sex with women who are the approximate age of his daughter Sydney, age 24.

I know this because I am a patron of Austin strip clubs. My friends and excellent contacts in the Austin strip club community tell me that Rick Perry, a la Bill Clinton, has an enabling entourage who gets him “young hotties” to have sex with — both here in Austin and especially when he is on the road. I learned about this before the 2010 Texas primary. I had an attractive stripper tell me about her direct dealings with Rick Perry. She said that she was attempting a Monica Lewinsky-type act upon Gov. Rick Perry (oral sex) but that in her words Perry was “too coked up” to perform sexually! When it came time for the stripper to leave, Perry gave her an outrageous amount of money, so large in fact that it probably means that Perry is taking cash bribes or illegal gifts to fund his extracurricular activities. Perry is not a rich man and I doubt he is spending that much of his own money on the women. (Actually sweetheart real estate deals have made the man unusual money.)

Another young woman, who has had direct dealings with Perry’s enabling entourage, told me that Perry is especially flagrantly adulterous when he goes on the road. She said that Perry has sex with the “young hotties” and that Perry and his entourage are literally having orgies in his hotel room. They are either calling escort services or picking up “young hotties” impressed by an arrogant, entitled governor of Texas .

Recently a local Austin reporter was telling me that they had heard about Rick Perry and the strippers in 2006, but they never could nail it down. Well, consider it confirmed. Additionally, there are many people in Austin who are convinced that the man is a homosexual or has had gay affairs in the past. I have never met a man who has had sex with Rick Perry, but I have met women who have had direct dealings with Adulterer Rick Perry and his enabling entourage. Perry has most definitely been living a double life.

Tea Party Fraud Rick Perry is Political Herpes [Stuffed Suits]

“Have you ever had sex with Rick Perry?” [Salon]


Remember Larry what’shisface who claimed to snorted coke and had sex with Barry in a limo?

Part of me is glad it’s not a librul but a Paultard who decided to play the “Show us on the Ken Doll where Rick Parry touched you?” game.

@ManchuCandidate: No Paultard, no popcorn. If it came from a Demrat, I probably would have ignored it.

@nojo: I’ve seen this before, but without the updated reference to the prayer rally. Other versions include allegations that Deranger ™ was a hypocrite because he was also pushing legislation to levy a $5 tax on peeler bars.

ADD: keep in mind the Chronicle is a free rag. Some good writers and they still charge for adverts, but still…

This is my favorite line: “I know this because I am a patron of Austin strip clubs. “

It’s a plant from the campaign to build up Perry’s Manly Man cred (remember the grenade launcher photo?) in response to the prevert engaging in preversion rumors.

not be outdone by perry, the lt. guv of missouri stalks a penthouse pet/stripper/pantless bartendress with offers of cookies, brownies, and condo cuddling:
when busted, the lt guv fessed up to being a christian and threw stones at the pet’s credibility.

@Mistress Cynica: Nay, the man is clearly an expert in strip club entertainment.

@Dodgerblue: i saw jamaal lewis of baltimore ravens and UT vols fame make it rain on the ladies at Bambi’s Last Chance here in rocky top in 1999. just a few years later one of the ladies claimed to have had his kid. i know this because i was a patron of bambi’s last chance.

I can’t remember if it’s lucre or succour Rick gives to pornographers, but I hear tell he does that too.

Wait wait wait… is that the Star Wars font?

@mellbell: Looks more like a really bad ripoff.

@redmanlaw: Right. They’re trying to make him look like a regular guy in a familiar RNC narrative schema. He’ll admit to pestorking hundreds of women, dozens at the same time, possibly scores, yet he came to JESUS and found a better life through the scripture of deregulation and zero taxes on capital gains. This sets up the prodigal son scenario a la George W.

@jwmcsame: Is that what you give a female stripper to make her like you? Cookies? With boy strippers its cash, XTC, meth, or nuthin’.

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