Our Forgetful Birthers

Among the many delightful responses to Wednesday’s dramatic reveal of The Birth Certificate of The Preznit of These United States, pride of place must go to WorldNetDaily’s Jerome Corsi, whose upcoming book, Where’s the Birth Certificate?, just suffered the most spectacular Spoiler Alert! in American history.

Because while his life’s work goes down in flames, Jerome Corsi stands defiantly amid the destruction, proclaiming Fiddle dee dee! As God is my witness, they’re not going to lick me!

Or, more prosaically:

A key problem for Obama is that birth certificates issued to twin girls born one day later at Kapi’olani hospital, the Nordykes, are the Rosetta Stone of deciphering both Obama’s previously released short-form Certification of Live Birth and the newly released purported copy of his long-form birth certificate.

Oooooooh, a new plot twist!

For old times’ sake, let’s hear him out. Bundles of Joy Susan and Gretchen Nordyke were born at Kapi’olani the afternoon after Baby Barry. And if you can get past the Hawaii Health Department Palace Guard, you’ll learn that their birth certificates are numbered 151-61-10637 and 151-61-10638.

But Obama’s birth certificate — 151-61-10641 — is numbered later, even though he was born earlier. And the certificate itself was filed with the state three days earlier than the twins’ documents.

We know what you’re thinking — but only the state issued the numbers, not the hospitals. And they used an old printing system to sequentially number the forms.

With those facts in hand, Corsi swoops in for the kill:

The question, therefore, is how was it possible that the Nordyke twins had their birth certificates accepted by the registrar general in Hawaii three days later than the registrar general accepted Obama’s birth certificate, when the twins’ numbers are lower than Obama’s number?

Have we ever mentioned how much we loved Encyclopedia Brown as a kid? Because we have the answer — but darn if somebody else didn’t beat us to it:

One explanation for the out-of-order serial numbers might be that several serialized stacks of birth certificates were made available at different hospitals.

Bingo! The blank forms were already numbered!

And who’s our lucky winner? Why, none other than WorldNetDaily’s Jerome Corsi, writing on July 28, 2009!

In Corsi’s defense, we can’t remember every detail of the 2,500 posts we’ve disgorged over the years, and it would be manifestly unfair of us to catch him in a Google Gotcha.

Which is why we didn’t. Instead, we simply clicked the link to the 2009 story in last night’s post. Much more efficient that way.

And so, in Jerome Corsi’s honor, we present this video of a cute little ducking irritating the shit out of a yappy dog. We think there’s a metaphor in it, but we’re too lazy to draw it out.

[Video via Sully]

chump was on last night with john king, who couldn’t get a word in edgewise, for the donalds outshouting him, he kept saying “EXCUSE ME.” he is an unbearable human being. he is claiming it was he and he alone who got barry to cough something up. i hope you all missed it.
he gives a bad name to all short fingered vulgarians. he doesn’t amuse me like the the other patients who think they’re presidential material, he just makes me hurl.

@baked: Imagine having to do business with him. Imagine being employed by him. Do we think he goes places, steals all the toilet paper then gloats about how much money he saved like David Merrick? His erections look exactly like him.

Speaking of which, the hot tree guy is coming this morning. Let’s hope he brings wood.

Damn. Again? It’s raining again? It’s been weeks. All my bulbs are looking beautiful on the rare occasions they can be seen. But now we’ve got some darkness at noon shit going on. One of the apple trees fell over because the ground is so damn wet. Bugger.

@Benedick HRH KFC:
Another harsh rain this morning. The weather is more fucked up.

Alabama got nailed with some nasty tornadoes (over 120+ dead so far) yesterday but people are tap dancing around the subject of Global Warming. As repeatedly ignored by folks (especially those in the thrall of the oil/gas people) is that there has been a noticeable increase in weather intensity and variability which is what the complex climate models have been predicting.

@ManchuCandidate: When I went on the NYT website a few minutes ago and saw the headline that 200+ people were dead in five southern states from the storms and tornadoes, my first thought was, “I wonder how many of those people thought climate change is a myth?”

And then I felt like a horrible terrible person and clicked over here for a while.

@ManchuCandidate: this is the fourth week in a row hyper-storms have swept through the confederacy and killed many from arkansas, oklahoma, missouri, mississippi, alabama, georgia, the carolinas and last night tennessee. we in rocky top had been spared until now when at least 15 died in tennessee, some close to me in greeneville which looks like ben cartwrights ponderosa only greener of course. yet still the vast majority of folks here ’bouts deny global warming and have no concept of the accelerated weather patterns and the destruction caused by global warming. they laugh at the all too small, lip service attempts by the tennessee valley authority to divest somewhat from coal towards windmills and solar power. tva has not made any technological innovations in hydro power generation since the 1930s. these people still drive the biggest damn pick up trucks and SUVs you’ll ever see. two people here at work drive space shuttles that take up 2 parking spaces. i have to stop at railroad track crossings at least once a day while the coal trains lumber by endlessly. folks had their car air conditioners on in march. office workers turn the heat up to 80 in the winter and down to 60 in the summer while they sit indoors all day, just like they do at home. the kingston steam plant that spilled the coal ash into the emory river spews allegedly scrubbed coal exhaust into the air 24 hours a day still. i have made loans to three guys who work there and they cough like 3 pack a day smokers. all this and more tornadoes, wind damage, and weather related deaths this year to date than any whole single year before and still folks round here deny global warming and its man made causes.

@SanFranLefty: To say nothing of the federal aid they’ll need.

Wow. Fast forward to the 5 minute mark for less screaming and more pointed questions.

Also, too, Republicans being hounded at these town hall meetings all seem to be promising to “do away” with corporations not paying taxes. How long do you think it will take before voters realize they’ve been lied to again? Will the right of the non-propertied classes to vote last long enough for that realization to make a difference?

I’m not surprised. Who hears of tornadoes in April (even happened in Canada City)? Not that I can ever recall.

@karen marie has her eyes tight shut:

Look at the shift on gay marriage. People are slow to figure it out, but as jwmcsame points out, some people are still stuck and will remain so till something catastrophic happens (and in most cases it will be too late.)

@SanFranLefty: i know how you feel. when i present such evidence to many here, their reply is god controls the climate. how do you explain reality to people you have to live and work with daily without insulting the very core of their existence, heart, and soul? yet these folks for the most part are very kind and generous due their religious upbringing and that is something that is misunderstood. the same folks who hold so dear to biblical lessons that fly in the face of science and logic and may seem so intolerant of those who disagree will show up this morning and rebuild those destroyed houses, raise money and find shelter for the displaced regardless of who the victim is. they will stop on the side of the road and fix a complete strangers broken down car. their churches raise money to pay folks delinquent mortgages. the same folks that anger and frustrate me at times will at other times amaze me with their generosity and kindness. i guess that’s what they mean when they say the lord moves in mysterious ways.

Just wait till they discover the cache of fully-matured Obama clones hidden in the headquarters of the Rand Corporation just waiting for their World Domination activation.

John Stossel investigates! You decide!

@jwmcsame: That’s all well and good, but they won’t lift a finger to help prevent the death and destruction in the first place. They get no bonus points from me.

@karen marie has her eyes tight shut: maybe not from climate change, unnecessary wars, corporate dominance, and lack of adequate health insurance but they will lend you a helping hand if you’re ever down here and forlorn.

@Benedick HRH KFC: That’s what pisses me off. They sure do hate the federal government and paying taxes, but they want my blue state tax $$$ to bail them out when the shit hits the fan. Ingrates.

Gail Collins highlights a new birther “but, but, but” line:

Texas State Representative Leo Berman (R) (and sponsor of a birther bill like Arizona’s) “wants to know why the hospital where the president was allegedly born doesn’t have a ‘plaque on the door’ commemorating the event. ”

And she made me LOL at this line about the stubby-fingered vulgarian:

Donald Trump immediately took credit. “Today I am very proud of myself,” he said. This is in contrast to normal days, when Trump is continually walking around in an existential funk, asking himself why he was ever born.

The origin of it for my use was the first South Park episode built around Terence and Phillip (and their love of Kraft Dinner.)

@redmanlaw: My putative father, that is the single most awesome clip your son Limey Nigel has yet seen. I know that all decent people hate Les Franche but the time comes when we must look beyond Camembert to Fin.

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