Enough Already

More shit that needs to go:

1) the Geico gekko – would somebody squash this little fucker already? Most aggravating ad campaign since the Energizer Bunny.

2) Ben Stein selling shit on TV – why does anyone pay this evolution-denying shitbag to sell anything?  Fuck him.

3) Steven Tyler – dude, you are 62 years old, yet you look like a Real Housewife of New Jersey. Retire, and stop spending your money on plastic surgery and hair extensions.

4) Oprah – face it folks, she ain’t that bright.

5) John TeshTBTL tells me he has the most popular evening radio program in the country.  Are you fucking kidding me? Anyone who can write something as awful as this should be summarily executed. I won a summer camp talent contest playing something on the piano that sounded very similar – when I was fucking ELEVEN YEARS OLD.

6) The Sixth Sense – yeah, I carry things around for a long time – suspend disbelief and believe that Bruce Willis has a PhD. M. Night Shyamalan is a douchebag – you cast Jeremy Irons in that role, period.

7) Belgium – been there, lovely country, but get your act together. You have the only fully-lit system of motorways in the world, so you can form a fucking government. Get crackin’.

Stay tuned – I assure you there will be more.

16 comments:

11:05 pm • Wednesday • February 23, 2011

Belgium. Best french fries. Period. For that reason alone Brussels must be EU headquarters. Also delicious cigarettes in packs of 25. I smoked then. But did I mention the fries? With mayonnaise? Also the town of Namur. And the fries.

That Progressive insurance woman. The works of Agatha Christie should be banned from all public media. Maggie Gallagher and her clown posse. Awards shows; talk shows; ‘edgy’ indie comedies that debuted at Sundance.

11:20 pm • Wednesday • February 23, 2011

@Right Reverend Benedick: And the beer in Belgium – so fresh, tastes like champagne. And the Leonidas chocolate? Best. EVAR.

11:35 pm • Wednesday • February 23, 2011

@Right Reverend Benedick: I agree about Agatha Christie. Ugh! Dramatizations of her “mysteries” are more entertaining than the books themselves because the actors create interesting characters, but little can be done about the ludicrous plots, in which motives for murder are more numerous than mosquitoes in summer in the Far North.

12:10 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

Bruno with a PhD is slightly more believable than Denise Richards’ character having a PhD in Nukular Phyziks (The World Is Not Enough, a 007 misadventure.)

Oprah, for sure. Mostly for her Dr Phil abomination and, to my shame, my parents are/were fans who tried to “help” me with his down home bullshit.

Ben Stein? I wish (for a second) that his game show was still on and I could win his damn money and then turn around and tell him that I was donating it to any number of librul or pro skienze organizations just to see the look on his face.

12:12 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@lynnlightfoot: we should make a big list of shit that is overrated. Like Cher. Like Richard Meier. Like Rahm. Can I get an amen?

12:44 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@blogenfreude: The fucking M1911 in .45 auto. C’mon, get over it. I’m sick of both of them. I won’t buy a gun mag if its has a 1911 on the cover. It just pisses me off. Who buys ’em? Old dudes with too much money.

12:46 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@redmanlaw: I do not have a list of guns I am over, but if you’d once and for all tell me a gun I could pack here in Manhattan, I might put it on the list.

1:16 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@blogenfreude: Like Cher.

That’s not even fish in a barrel. More like already roasting on the grill.

1:24 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@blogenfreude: First off, you need a permit, otherwise you end up in the hole with various rappers and NFL stars.

I haven’t researched NY gun laws, but I imagine that anything with 10 + rounds capacity is out. Concealable or non-concealable? My Glock 19 in 9mm is too big to conceal and would need a smaller capacity magazine, but it’s an awesome pistol. My Ruger SP 101 in .357 mag/.38 Special cal. is my carry gun, but it takes a lot of practice to consistently hit targets out to 10 yards. Revolvers are thick and carry only 5 or 6 rounds, so you have to have a reload.

I was looking at a Taurus PT 709 Slim in 9 mm today. It’s pretty small, so it would have more recoil than a larger gun, but it has a 7 round magazine, easy to see three dot sights and a magazine release where it should be, on the left side of the grip by the thumb. I have small hands, so I have to rotate the Glock 45 degrees to drop a magazine. They hold 15 rounds, but they’re really thick in the grip. The Taurus fit the front pocket of my khakis pretty well and would not “print” through the pants with the right kind of pocket holster. The ammo for 9mm is fairly cheap, maybe the least expensive of the major defensive calibers, so you could shoot a lot to practice (I’m up to about 450 rounds total in 9 and 38 this year) although you could expect to see a 5-10 percent increase in May. I paid $10 each for two 50-round boxes of cheap ass practice ammo, and $18 for a box of .357 mag practice/home defense hollow point ammo.

The Taurus Slim goes for $399 at the big box sporting goods retailer. Taurus has a bit of a spotty record as regards quality, but most people are very satisfied with them. I’ve also shot the Taurus Millenium PRO in 9mm, and if it was good enough for my former Army Ranger buddy, it should be ok for anyone. I’m thinking about picking up the Slim this spring as well as laser sights for the Glock. The important thing about a laser is to make sure they’re sighted in right. Mine on the Ruger revolver need adjustment, so I just shoot with the sights until I get around to (re-)sighting in the laser.

Also, read Mossad Ayoob and other writers on defensive handgun use and the legal and psychological implications of the use of firearms, unless you want to get into shooting for sport only, in which case I’d recommend the full size Glock 17 or mid-size/compact 19 in 9 mm.

http://averagejoeshandgunreviews.blogspot.com/2009/07/taurus-pt-709-slim-9mm-i-know-that-i.html

8:11 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@blogenfreude: Amen. Can’t at the moment think of any candidates, but that’s just because it’s morning and I haven’t even had my second cup of coffee. I’ll be thinking about it and awaiting your post on The Overrated.

8:31 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

I think Cher’s a hoot.

But speaking of Cher, drag queens.

9:30 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@Right Reverend Benedick:
Speaking of drag queens, Mitch Daniels. ;)

But seriously, here’s a delightful piece where he’s blissfully unaware of the workings of the modern justice system:

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2011/02/24/daniels-talks-past-drug-use-arrest/

Two SHOEBOXES full of weed, acid and pills and the fucker gets a $350 fine. Somebody should point out to him that if he’d been doing the same thing in Harlem in 1970 he might still be IN jail…

9:43 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@al2o3cr: To be fair, even nine years after Daniels’ encounter, we called the amount of drugs he was caught with “Thursday night”.

ADD: turned on AlJazeera just in time to hear the “click” then a dial tone after Gaddafi’s call in show tonight. Post-call analysis is that (a) he insisted he is “just” a symbolic figure, and (b) he remains, certifiably, nuts.

9:54 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@al2o3cr: daniels said he had an uncertain mooring. well, in 1981 i was certainly moored in a friends dorm room when the campus cops invited themsleves in and confiscated a little bit of some very good red hair sinsemilla that the east tennessee ex-moonshiners had just perfected. the pigs overlooked 2 sheets of acid and a three foot purple bong not knowing what either were. they also believed the triple beam scales stolen from the chemistry dept were for science experiments. i wish the pigs were still that dumb.

9:58 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@Nabisco: speaking of thursday, has anyone seen this movie, Thursday with Thomas Jane, Aaron Eckhart, and many others? It is a riot. I have yet to encounter any one who has seen this rare comedic gem, so please if y’all get a chance, watch it. You will not be disappointed.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thursday_%28film%29

10:56 am • Thursday • February 24, 2011

@al2o3cr: You say that as if the Harlem/Princeton double standard doesn’t exist today…

Two shoeboxes, though? That’s not youthful personal use. That’s called being the go-to guy in the eating club for weed.

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