Lighten Up, Francis
It was a semi-serious thought. Everything about the Hammer screamed a single-minded focus on political gain — mostly, through cold, calculating attempts to make the Democratic Party look like a bunch of baby-eating, God-hating, economy-killing monsters. My strong desire was to see verifiable evidence that Tom DeLay had the capacity to do something fun — in the hope that taking time for the finer things in life would make DeLay less of a jerk.
You see a bit of this in the lip-flapping about Stephen Colbert’s performance on Friday before Congress — as further explained post-jump.
Naturally, Steve King (R-Iowa), who is probably the nastiest anti-immigrant advocate north of Arizona, totally missed the joke, saying: “I think it’s an insult to the time, an insult to the intelligence of the American people.”
The key here is “insult to the time.” First of all: “the time” is an inanimate concept — which cannot be insulted, by definition. [Unless you are referring to Morris Day and The Time, in which case you will have to answer to one P.R. Nelson, Esq.]
Growing out of that truth is the fact that what this answer was all about was pure fury. The brain of Steve-O could not process the irrationality of what he was saying (on Fox News, appropriately enough). Objective One: Destroy the man who basically put the lie to the “deport-them-all-and-let-God-sort-them-out” idea that King implicitly fights for day in and day out.
But also: it should be remembered that this came on a Friday before a mad dash back home, to begin campaigning in earnest. Just about anything that Congress manages to accomplish on a Friday is a bonus, barring extraordinary circumstances.
The most telling thing about this, though? There is no time to laugh. How can there be laughter when our society is being rotted from within by people who are willing to work themselves to the bone for scraps?
Of course, the Democratic leadership came to the defense of a guy calling conservatives on their rhetoric, to the benefit of their efforts to appeal to the Hispanic — no, wait:
Comedian Stephen Colbert’s satirical testimony before a House subcommittee last week was “an embarrassment” that should not have happened, the second-ranking House Democrat said Sunday.
“I think his testimony was not appropriate,” House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer (D-Md.) said on ” Fox News Sunday.” “What he had to say was not the way it should have been said.”
And so: a humble request. No matter who has control of the Congress next year, I demand that everybody on Capitol Hill CHILL THE HELL OUT. A loss on a piece of legislation may suck. But it is not the end of the world. A win will not be a cure-all, requiring laser focus on nothing but total victory and the complete destruction of the other side.
We had a damned Civil War — Ken Burns has about twenty hours of montages to prove it. If that didn’t kill off the United States, neither will gay marriage. Or a few million Latin Americans trying to grab the American Dream by any means necessary. Or a little bit of a wait for free health care. Or paying a little bit more in taxes to cover the bills. Or slashing any number of overweight governmental agencies. Or making regulations useful, rather than harmful (however you measure that). Or telling Israel or the Palestinian Authority or Iran or North Korea or Venezuela to shove it.
Everything’s going to be fine. Go to a movie every once in a while. Take a walk in a park. Go to a baseball game and stay for the whole game. Breathe deeply. And, for Christ’s sake — laugh.