Christine O’Donnell Can’t Get Laid

She just needs the pestorker. Should Stinque.com mount a campaign to get Christine a good solid fuck?

@FlyingChainSaw:
I would, but I think she’d cast a spell and turn my penis into a newt.

@FlyingChainSaw: Or just send her “The Grind Workout,” which Amazon is suddenly recommending.

Will Delaware really push the apocalyptic No Nasty button?

My god you did it, you bastards, you did it. You blew it up. Damn you, damn you all, damn you all to helllllllllllllllllll…

@ManchuCandidate: Hehehehe. Or into a miniature of her shouting NO FUCKING! JESUS SAYS NO FUCKING, when it gets hard.

Wow, too bad Serling isn’t around to produce Twilight Zone episodes.

It’s all fun and games now, but just wait till Empress C O’D begins sending US Marines door-to-door to measure each man’s ejaculate to ensure that NO ONE is fornicating or simply trying to enjoy a long, satisfying night of spanking it.

Who’ll be laughing then? Who indeed.

@¡Andrew!:
She’d have not so good luck with that considering the US military is what keeps the world sex trade going.

I once asked why there were so many barber shops outside a US military base in ROK. My mom turned red and said its cause they liked getting their haircut short. Turns out, barber poles in ROK have different meaning than they do here. They got trim, but not the hair kind.

What is Eric Nies doing these days anyway? Has he resorted to gay porn yet?

@ManchuCandidate: I would not. I don’t want to touch her, or even be in the same room.

@ManchuCandidate: I’m reading Sebastian Junger’s “War” right now. Suffice it to say that the grunts would not be her best enforcers: they swap details on the best places to get off during a firefight.

@rptrcub:

One can only hope.

@Nabisco: During a firefight? As bullets zing by and take of parts of their ears, they’re pestorking?

I guess it isn’t that far to fetch, but must we now mount a campaign to keep our soldiers focused on safe sex whilst in combat? (Sign me up.)

@FlyingChainSaw: Should Stinque.com mount a campaign to get Christine a good solid fuck?

Yes, if that is a fuck thrown by a very butch lesbian with a truly awesome strap-on, wearing a leather jacket and eau de Motorcycle Grease. Actually, I have a friend in mind. Christine, just call me, I can put you in touch with her.

@PedonatorUSA: Yeah, with a quart of transmission fluid poured over the strap on. Dig it. Can you get a picture of her. We can write up a little proposal.

Psychobutch Offers to Shred Jesufascist’s Cement Fucking Hymen in the Name of Jesus Fucking Christ!

Your buddy can do the deed on the altar of a burning church and we can produce the show on ESPN.

The pay per view revenues will exceed the GDP of a lot of countries. You can count on it.

@FlyingChainSaw: We can write up a little proposal.

Save Delaware! FCS, I know you have an in with the IMF. If I can get these pictures, can you throw the election?

We can impose an austerity program, such as.

I’m trying to figure out how it can benefit us even as I write.

@PedonatorUSA: Pictures? Is your friend the monster dyke already giving Christine the good news?

@FlyingChainSaw: …and if she is, the question is still, where’s the money?

I’ll swap you a bet on credit default from Argentina, say $3B, for $100M of your hold in Greek debt. Offer only good for a microsecond!

@PedonatorUSA: If the good news was up Christine’s ass, she’d know it!

BUY!

@FlyingChainSaw: E-fucking-gad.

You just mentioned “Christine O’Donnell” and “good, solid fuck” in the same sentence and my penis just detached itself, shinnied down my leg and ran screaming from the room.

Thanks. Now I have to sit down to piss, dammit.

@PedonatorUSA and FlyingChainSaw: Somehow I see Christine as the one wearing the strap-on, no doubt pegging some good Xtian Congresscritter.

Your virginity, your old virginity, is like one of our French withered pears; it looks ill, it eats drily.

All’s Well That Ends Well And Such As.

Son-of-a-bitch motherfucker could write!

@Benedick Arnuldsson Manpants: That’s just the teaser, so to speak.

It is not politic in the commonwealth of nature to preserve virginity. Loss of virginity is rational increase, and there was never virgin got till virginity was first lost. That you were made of is metal to make virgins. Virginity by being once lost may be ten times found; by being ever kept is ever lost. ‘Tis too cold a companion. Away with’t! ‘Tis against the rule of nature. To speak on the part of virginity is to accuse your mothers, which is most infallible disobedience. He that hangs himself is a virgin; virginity murders itself, and should be buried in highways out of all sanctified limit, as a desperate offendress against nature. Virginity breeds mites, much like a cheese, consumes itself to the very paring, and so dies with feeding his own stomach. Besides, virginity is peevish, proud, idle, made of self-love, which is the most inhibited sin in the canon. Keep it not; you cannot choose but lose by’t. Out with’t! Within ten year it will make itself ten, which is a goodly increase, and the principal itself not much the worse. Away with’t! ‘Tis a commodity will lose the gloss with lying: the longer kept, the less worth. Off with’t while ’tis vendible; answer the time of request. Virginity, like an old courtier, wears her cap out of fashion, richly suited, but unsuitable, just like the brooch and the toothpick, which wear not now. Your date is better in your pie and your porridge than in your cheek; and your virginity, your old virginity, is like one of our French withered pears: it looks ill, it eats drily. Marry, ’tis a withered pear; it was formerly better; marry, yet ’tis a withered pear! Will you anything with it?