Ordinary People

I could listen to Minnesotans say “vote” and “about” all.day.long donchaknow? Actually, I’d like to hear Manchu’s accent.

About = a boat

And, yes, my Philly accent is strong.

So, does it look like Methhead Crazy Eyes Bachmann is a shoe-in?

Why the fuck should Michelle Bachmann give a flying fuck about losers who deserve to be homeless and die of preventable diseases when she can hang out with Talibunny and make out with her while listening to Nuremberg rally tapes?

@JNOV: Two words: Terrance, Philip.

@blogenfreude: Ike!

@JNOV:

Don’t kick the baby! :)

And don’t tell the teabaggers, especially the bit about only municipalities under 50k seeing a rise in murder rate. Wouldn’t want to interrupt their “civilization is falling apart cuz a black dude’s president” routine…

@al2o3cr: Hee!

Hey — People are outside setting off fireworks and honking horns and shit. Did we win something in Sport? My guess is the Flyers did something?

Isn’t it a little hot to be playing hockey? WTF?

@JNOV: My understanding is that both the hockey playoffs and the NBA playoffs occupy 13 months out of each year, and the playoffs actually start with more teams than there are in the respective leagues. All playoff matchups are ‘best out of 3,496 games” events, and almost all come down to the 3,496th game.

I know as much about it, and care as much, as I do about Nascar.

@JNOV: I do have to say this about hockey, its the only sport I know of, where it is legal to simply go and slam the motherfucking shit out of an opposing player, simply launch yourself at him, slam him, try to injure him, as long as you don’t use your stick or your skate blades. This is called “checking.” Its legal. The only limitation on your use of this tactic, is the fact that every team has a player officially known as their “goon,” and if you “check” opposing players too much, the other team will send out their “goon,” and the goon will punish your players who ‘check” too aggressively, by attacking them, just flat out beating the shit out of them, biting and gouging and wreaking mayhem, and as punishment for their crime of aggravated assault, the goon will be sentenced to as much as 5 minutes in the “penalty box,” where fans throw drinks on them, while the victim’s team gets to celebrate with a “power play.” The strategies involved are very complicated, similar to the old cold war chess game of “mutually assured destruction.”

Now thats a sport, boy howdy.

Hey y’all, it’s flippin’s birthday!!! And I got to spend it with her and General Homofascist!

@SanFranLefty: I am soooo jealous–but not of the hangover you’ll probably have tomorrow, knowing the Chi crew!

@Mistress Cynica: No, believe it or not, we were good and we attempted to restrain ourselves since we all have to work in the morning. That said, flippin and I did have to make a vodka run in the middle of the evening, luckily HF now lives across the alley from not one but two liquor stores.

And next time you’re there you have to meet HF’s slutty kitty. Like her daddy, she’s an adorable lovebug.

Happy Birthday, Eck!

Yes, happy b-day hangover, Flippin

@JNOV:
re philly accents. though it’s fingernails on a blackboard to most, it’s music to my ears. i have relatives who worked hard at losing it..wussies.

water=wooter
gas=gazz
glass=rhymes with ass
home=hoome
doesn’t =”don’t” exist
come here=c’mere
didn’t=dint
what=wut
where=wier
lastly=ghaastly
chocolate=chawclet
oh no you di-ent.
how=howl
vanila=venilla

i figure it’s wut you say, not howl you say it.
i have no aspirations to be a venilla tv bobblehead.

@SanFranLefty: @Tommmcat Still Gets Carly Confused With Meg: @ManchuCandidate: Thanks, y’all! Much as I looovve getting drunk with fellow Stinquers, this year’s birthday hangover was Sunday, so I wasn’t ready for an encore performance today. But it was really great to see SFL again, and HF was host extraordinaire, as always.

@flippin eck:
my wishes were sent to you via FB, where we discussed how you are older than jesus, etc. that was fun!
great to see lefty and HF AGAIN. damn.
a stellar way to start the year! xo happy happy flip.

@baked: <3

@flippin eck:

Belated happy birthday!

@Promnight: Your understanding of the hockey playoffs parallels mine. Alas, my beloved is devoted to hockey, so every May and what seems like most of June is made hideous for me by wall-to-wall Stanley Cup hoopla.